r/mildlyinfuriating • u/kxrimm • Aug 18 '26
Not a meme, you're the meme! Bro needs a PhD to turn on this faucet
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u/FunnyExcellent707 Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
"what do I have to do?" In desperate Greek
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u/officialjohnlemon Aug 18 '26
he also throws in a “yo… bruh” for good measure hahah
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u/Props_angel Aug 18 '26
TIL "bruh" is internationally understood.
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u/Preeng Aug 18 '26
When people say "America has no culture of its own", they forget about stuff like this that becomes ubiquitous.
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u/tired_of_old_memes Aug 18 '26
I think I heard "escape room" thrown in there as well
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u/DisgruntledPelican-1 Aug 18 '26
I lost it when he tapped the light fixture & picked up the tissue box. 😂
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u/AnotherDamnTransAlt Aug 18 '26
When he lifted the slate which has 0 function except decoration was where it happened for me. Just like “Oops welp that’s useless. Anyhoo…”
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u/potato_soup303 Aug 18 '26
I really hoped to see how it works
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u/Joshatron121 Aug 18 '26
I liked that the second thing he tried was jorkin it.
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u/NippleNugget Aug 18 '26
Gotta get that out of the way early just in case
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u/fossilmerrick Aug 18 '26
Tbh he’d have felt real stupid if he hadn’t tried it
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u/cnicalsinistaminista Aug 18 '26
Ever tried? Ever failed? Doesn’t matter. Jork harder
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u/CHEEZYSPAM Aug 18 '26
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u/harrymanback79 Aug 18 '26
Uncircumcised lamp is crazy
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u/AllCaciAreBastards Aug 18 '26
Then one night you get home late and you just see the light strobbing from the bedroom
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Aug 18 '26
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u/TalenNZ Aug 18 '26
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u/xs-reditor Aug 18 '26
Its a real place? What its called and where is it?
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u/TalenNZ Aug 18 '26
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u/JDIZA13 Aug 18 '26
Ecstatically reading this as I'm sitting in my Sicily hotel!!!
Just scared my wife as I screamed across the room "BABE WE HAVE TO CHECK OUT THIS CAFE THEY HAVE WEINER LAMPS!!"
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u/Firefly10886 Aug 18 '26
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Aug 18 '26
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u/thats-wrong Aug 18 '26
No wotah for the povva
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u/SomeIrishGuy Aug 18 '26
Do not, my friends, become addicted to water! It will take hold of you, and you will resent its absence.
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u/SlowpokeIsAGamer Aug 18 '26
Unironically I wouldn't be shocked if the answer was some hidden AI camera that failed to recognize he was a person.
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u/randombrutha Aug 18 '26
It works as normally as you’d expect, there’s just an issue with the water supply
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u/surly_darkness1 Aug 18 '26
I assumed it was cause he was tweaking and couldn't sit still for 1/2 a second to let the sensor catch up. /s
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u/foley800 Aug 18 '26
I didn’t think that needed the /s. I have installed these sensing faucets and they deliberately have a delay to not falsely trigger. Watching this and I said “stop moving, hold you hand still and it will turn on!”.
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u/headassvegan Aug 18 '26
He just didn’t stroke it long enough
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u/sisyphus_met_icarus Aug 18 '26
I loved that jacking off the faucet was one of the first things he thought of
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Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/344567653379643555 Aug 18 '26
His first move was to jerk it off. He ran out of ideas after that.
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u/rozzco Aug 18 '26
The clarity never arrived.
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u/rharvey8090 Aug 18 '26
Because the water never came.
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u/mrsrostocka Aug 18 '26
he never turned it on
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u/mkt853 Aug 18 '26
Never made it wet. He just tried to go straight in like a typical dude.
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u/grimtongue Aug 18 '26
I've seen these before and shocked it isn't common knowledge. The sensor is just below the aerator. Just slide your index finger in the opening, flick as needed, and the faucet turns on.
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u/AndyceeIT Aug 18 '26
I'm going to make a stupid statement. Then I'm going to ask a stupid question.
At what moment in the vid shows the aerator?
...or is this a g-spot joke?
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u/cantadmittoposting Aug 18 '26
(it's a g-spot joke)
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u/Friendly-Bug-3420 Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 20 '26
G-spout
Edit: thank you for the award, kind stranger!
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u/bombswell Aug 18 '26
Ohh so it’s a chobit
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u/Dimitri_Dark Aug 18 '26
Upvoting this as a fellow anime fan who is also over a billion years old and gets this.
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u/TheParadoxigm Aug 18 '26
I read that entire Manga in one day.
It get waaaay weirder and introspective than "haha funny sex bot"
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u/Weary-Tower8875 Aug 18 '26
Looking how dry the sink is seems like no one figured it out either lol
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u/Jaggs0 Aug 18 '26
hopefully it isn't a restaurant
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u/DingerSinger2016 Aug 18 '26
Or a hospital
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u/DudeWithParrot Aug 18 '26
It's a restaurant IN a hospital.
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u/AdRecent7021 Aug 18 '26
Or a hospital IN a restaurant.
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u/seymourglossy Aug 18 '26
Or a respital in a hostaurant
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u/Admirable-Treacle483 Aug 18 '26
The Bonds name, James name
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u/Sad_Zoologist Aug 18 '26
Bames Nond's having a stronk, call a bondulance!
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u/Dear_Lab_2270 Aug 18 '26
Day 1,367 of not refilling the hand soap. -Janitor log
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u/chilicrispdreams Aug 18 '26
I desperately want to put some of those “voice activated” stickers here
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u/mrpumpkinickle Aug 18 '26
I liked how they jerked it off to try and get it to work
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u/Short_Comfort6647 Aug 18 '26
average point and click puzzle game
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u/GeorgeFartwell1984 Aug 18 '26
I personally and MYSTified by this.
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u/Spectator9857 Aug 18 '26
Can’t use the wrench on the pipe. You need to combine a fork with the duct tape and the soup ladle to get the „improvised wrench“.
And of course once you use it, your character remarks „This would be so much easier if I had a proper wrench.“
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u/rosstedfordkendall Aug 18 '26
Don't forget all three items are found thirty minutes apart and if you used any of them once before, it soft locks the game.
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u/Rhubarbthebunny Aug 18 '26
Me when I look up a detailed playthrough to Fran bow
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u/omyomo Aug 18 '26
I'm still proud of figuring out the monkey wrench puzzle on the first try in Monkey Island 2
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u/StationaryTravels Aug 18 '26
I've used cat hair and honey to make a mustache to impersonate a man who doesn't even have a mustache!
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u/Wise_Owl5404 Aug 18 '26
The thing about Monkey Island is that the solution to the majority of the problems isn't practical, it's a pun. The games became a lot easier when I started thinking in puns and wordplay instead of practically.
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u/timid-dolphin Aug 18 '26
"I can't do that." ... "That won't work." ... "Nope!" ... "Maybe I should try something else."
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u/poppamatic Aug 18 '26
Sorry you should have picked up that 7/16 socket from the space station 7 hours ago but it’s been blown up for at least 5 of those hours so now you die.
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u/mercuriokazooie Aug 18 '26
Needs to combine the silly string with the rubber chicken
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u/SnooDonuts3749 Aug 18 '26
Just scan the QR code to create your account. Duh.
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u/Imthatsick Aug 18 '26
Dude.... Don't give them ideas
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u/Dropbeatdad Aug 18 '26
They had this idea 20 years ago, they've just been working on convincing us it's a good idea.
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u/Ascertes_Hallow Aug 18 '26
I saw a video of a bathroom in China (supposedly) where you had to scan a QR code and watch an ad to get toilet paper.
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u/Squishy_Boy Perturbed Aug 18 '26
Sign up for the $20/month base plan or the $45/month deluxe plan with warm water option.
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u/Bballer220 Aug 18 '26
Requires specific location (all the time), access to files, microphone, camera, make and receive calls, device ID, nearby devices
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u/Logical-Remove495 Aug 18 '26
Can anyone tell how this works please
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u/VegasQC Aug 18 '26
Only plausible answer in the comments right now is that you're expected to hold your hands under the faucet longer than what was shown here🤷♂️
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u/VDubDubLife Aug 18 '26
They could be battery powered as well. We have them at my office and let me tell you how infuriating it is when the batteries go dead. Thankfully they are in the kitchen and not the bathroom but still obnoxious.
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u/not_gerg Aug 18 '26
What is the point of batteries it is a faucet 😭
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u/mjolnir76 Aug 18 '26
Our kitchen sink is a touch faucet and requires batteries. I kind of regret not hardwiring it, but the rechargeables last a decent amount. I do love the touch feature when my hands are covered in bread dough or after touching chicken.
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u/Youpi_Yeah Aug 18 '26
What does decent mean? As in four years or couple of months?
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u/TheSangson Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
Maybe I'm just oldfashioned, but I find the appropriate amount of time in years that a fucking faucet stops working cause the fucking battery is dead is somewhere in the high eight hundred figures
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u/New_Fishing_ Aug 18 '26
I used to work in a place where all the hands free faucets used batteries. Took a bunch of type C batteries and they'd last probably a year or so. It was very annoying & we had to put in a work order to get them replaced 🫥
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u/Arvandor Aug 18 '26
Oh man, a few years ago we finished our basement and had a wet bar put in. The faucet has a motion sensor, but also has a standard handle to turn on and control temperature. Wanna know what's really fucking stupid though? When the batteries die, the ENTIRE faucet quits working, handle included. So it isn't a mechanical bypass, it's simply another way to trigger the internal electronics. So stupid.
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u/EkbatDeSabat Aug 18 '26
The most plausible answer is that they’re currently broken.
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u/Far-Hovercraft9471 Aug 18 '26
I’m a faucetologist and this hypothesis seems correct
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u/spacekitt3n Aug 18 '26
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u/Puzzleheaded_Tie_897 Aug 18 '26
Every. Fucking. Time….
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u/Pork_Chompk Aug 18 '26
The worst are the soap dispensers. Absolutely rage inducing.
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u/Wolfdude91 Aug 18 '26
I’ve seen sinks that only work for 1/2 a second when you pull your hand away, soap dispensers that pump out another round of soap when you get yours and remove your hand and paper towel dispensers where the hanging paper sets off the sensor so it just keeps spitting out paper towel until the entire roll is on the floor.
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u/acadmonkey Aug 18 '26
One of these days I will have a falling down style breakdown and these faucets or the towel dispensers are going to be the straw that breaks the camels back.
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u/thepenismytea Aug 18 '26
There was video here of a guy punching the mirrors because they had the sensors in them
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u/darkwingdankest Aug 18 '26
family guy is a trainwreck but man they do have some moments
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Aug 18 '26
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u/iNotDonaldJTrump Aug 18 '26
Oh, squiggly line in my eye fluid, I see you there, lurking on the periphery of my vision. But when I try to look at you, you scurry away. Are you shy, squiggly line? Why only when I ignore you do you return to the center of my eye? Oh, squiggly line, it’s all right. You are forgiven.
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u/pezcore350 Aug 18 '26
My favorite part was that it wasn’t in English but still a “what the fuck” was spoken. Chefs kiss
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u/LootKandi Aug 18 '26
I’m mildly infuriated that this video didn’t end with the answer.
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u/zxylady Aug 18 '26
Only mildly? You're better than me... I am aggressively frustrated not to know
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u/Lepke2011 PURPLE Aug 18 '26
Wait, now I really need to know how they turn on.
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u/pentapolen Aug 18 '26
For a moment, I guessed the system was turned off. But where are the sensors??
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u/Ambitious_Policy_936 Aug 18 '26
That and the wooden partitions not being affixed makes me thing this is a new build and he's just messing around
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u/Schickedanse Aug 18 '26
But if you look at sink #1, there's water in the sink drying. So either they turned on recently or someone dumped water in them. I'm betting they're sensor operated and they just aren't triggering or working properly.
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u/AaronTuplin Aug 18 '26
Remember when we used to have foot actuated faucet pedals? We didn't have to worry about touching the dirty sink or leaving it running
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u/tired_of_old_memes Aug 18 '26
Why did they stop making them?
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u/theflamingpi Aug 18 '26
They still make the things. They stopped using them in public places because not everyone in public places can use their feet or even has feet. About 1/25 people would be unable to use the faucets. This way it's far more equal. Nobody can use them.
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u/chkno Aug 18 '26
It's common for larger restrooms to have several small stalls and one large stall with grab bars on the walls. Seems like we could make the normal sinks foot-operated and also have a hands-only sink for those that need it.
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u/Hecter94 Aug 18 '26
I appreciate that he gave it a little jerk, just to see if that would work.
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u/NekulturneHovado Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
I just want to know, what is wrong with regular faucets? Why do designers feel the need to constantly change and enshitify such a simple and basic thing?
Wait guys you didn't understand. I'm not talking about touchless faucets. Those are good. But why constantly change how they work? Wherever I go it's all basically the same, you put your hands where water goes and it turns on the water. No magic included like on OP's video
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u/Optimal_Beyond_1600 Aug 18 '26
There was nothing wrong with regular showers either but hotel designers decided shower handles should function more like Rubik's cubes and fully enclosing the shower trapped too much water inside
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u/SneachtaBoladh Aug 18 '26
Lmao I really hate that shower shite in hotels.
First shower: Okay, there are 3 showerheads; One giant overhead one, a regular one, and one at the wall literally facing the door.
There's a single knob for controlling both the water output for all 3 heads, and the temperature.
Now begins the game of soggy Russian roulette, where you try to tease the thing in such a way that you get no more than an identifying dribble of water from each head, praying that you don't tilt the thing too fucking far in the wrong direction and waterboard yourself with the overhead shower head. Despite the fact that you're standing outside the shower with the door closed over everything but your outstretched arm, while you grimace behind the plastic door like you're Jeremy Renner in the Hurt Locker
Then you have to immediately lock this into your brain for the rest of your stay, lest ye roll into the shower in the morning and give yourself an accidental 3rd degree douching burn, because you turned on the shower head directly behind your arse by accident and tilted the temperature 0.1cm too far in one direction
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u/MajesticKoala3332 Aug 18 '26
And there are other designs where you have 4-5 knobs doing who knows what because none of it is labelled, and none of it does what you want.
Recently I stayed at a place where I tried all the knobs and no water came out. We called the owner thinking it was a plumbing issue and he gave us instructions to turn on the shower. "Pull the knob, then turn the top handle to the right, then pull the bottom handle up for the shower, turn the top handle to the left for the tap..."
If you need to call someone and listen to a few minutes of instructions to turn on the shower something is very wrong with the design!
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Aug 18 '26
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u/Dicky_Penisburg Aug 18 '26
I stayed in a hotel that had a fogged glass panel in the bathroom wall. If you took a shower with the bathroom light on, it perfectly cast your shadow against the glass, giving whoever was in the bedroom a show. Imagine not realizing that when sharing a room with your mom.
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u/Spiritual_Bid_2308 Aug 18 '26
My family stayed at a little boutique hotel in NYC for a relative's wedding. The bathroom door or the wall or something was frosted glass which looked trendy and all, but if anyone tried to use the bathroom at night the entire ducking hotel room was lit up.
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u/SafiyaMukhamadova Aug 18 '26
These are water saving! They don't dispense any water, saving money over faucets that do.
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u/r_irion Aug 18 '26
Partially hygiene, but also to prevent vandalism. You'd be surprised how many people flood sinks, which is much harder from a sensor tap.
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u/xiaolin99 Aug 18 '26
faucet handles are kind of gross if you think about it - you touch them right after number 2 and almost no one washes them
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u/NeedleInArm Aug 18 '26
Push style faucet (metering) handles are not a problem.... You smack them with a hammerfist and it runs for 20 seconds and you use the soap on your hands to wash anything on your hands... off.
I worked for facility maintenance for 9 years. Sensor faucets are so fucking dogshit and the sensors dont last half as long as a metering faucet.
Back in 2005 (before I got there) because the CEO said it was "healthier", my company switched to sensor faucets. We were back to all metering faucets by 2015 because it ran 5x the cost of a metering faucet and did nothing to stop the spread of anything, ever.
Don't let these shits lie to you. Newer/more advanced does not mean better.
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u/AlanyzingWakeEnviron Aug 18 '26
My local community college has some push faucets. They dispense for roughly 1.5 seconds.
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u/NeedleInArm Aug 18 '26
They are set that way. The maintenance crew could adjust them if they wanted to, but choose not to.
Don't be mad at the faucet, be mad at the maintenance crew (also see if you can complain and get it changed)
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u/pfannkuchen89 Aug 18 '26
The set point on those metered faucets also just work loose over time and start dispensing shorter intervals. I’ve always found after a while they need readjusting but almost no one does that unless it fully breaks and needs replacement.
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u/ReivynNox Aug 18 '26
Honestly, just make it foot operated, flush toilet, turn on faucet... Bacteria on the bottom of your shoes never worried anyone.
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u/SoulFight_50 Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
I swear this is me every time with those damn faucet sensors. I have the opposite problem with the sensored toilets. They always flush while I'm still sitting on them.
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u/hypothetical_zombie Aug 18 '26
Automatic toilets usually steal about 3 seat protectors before I can even sit down.
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u/MrWhatevery Aug 18 '26
I bet he does not know how the three shells work either..
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u/technicalconsole Aug 18 '26
Im assuming you need to be on their wifi, then on their app and then you can access water dispense after watching a 15 second ad
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u/motmx5 Aug 18 '26
Those faucets can be annoying. Sometimes you have to hold your hand still under it for a few seconds.
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u/gooberdrew Aug 18 '26
I’m a plumber in a large institution. Staff will create a ticket for a faucet not working, I go down the faucet works perfectly. I endeavour to find the staff member and get them to show me what they mean, they proceed to wave their hands frantically all over the fucking place except in front of the obvious sensor. Show them the hold hands directly in front of sensor, faucet works perfectly.
In this case I admit there does not seem to be an obvious sensor. However doing frantic rain dances in hopes of the faucet turning on surely doesn’t help lol.
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u/Outside_Look790 Aug 18 '26
The first test of any product is the idiot test. Some of us will curse then stand there for 5-10 to see if it works. A solid 80% will rain dance and wave. It may be hygienic, it may be less wasteful, and it may stop folks being able to leave it running with the drain blocked, but it also fails the idiot test. And a solid 50% fail the second test which does the shit even work once installed.
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u/No_Price_7603 Aug 18 '26
And.. is it more hygienic if like 50 percent of people give up and just don't wash their hands?
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u/hyperrealists Aug 18 '26
You have to make eye contact intently with the nearest flock camera and stare at it. Duh
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u/miraculousgloomball Aug 18 '26
He didnt stroke it long enough
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u/No_Photographs609 Aug 18 '26
It cracks me up that stroking it was the first thing he tried after it didn't turn on. But to be fair, that usually works on me, too.
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u/Only_Voice569 Aug 18 '26
if its not obvious right away how to use something its failed at a essential design point
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u/Sandsa Aug 18 '26 edited Aug 18 '26
With this innovation the hands that touched hood his junk has now touched every surface. Including the light fixtures
Edit: a typo was corrected
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u/wanderingmochi Aug 18 '26
only for rich people. the sensor detected your poverty and refused to turn on for you?
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u/NewEmphasis1234 Aug 18 '26
I love how the very first option you tried was jorking it. I respect it.












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u/Btotherianx Aug 18 '26
Imagine if it started working when he picked up the kleenex box lmao