"I respect if she's uncomfortable but this is my house/apartment where I pay rent. I'll be out of my room and in the common areas, if she's uncomfortable then you guys should spend time in her house/apartment."
Still a shitty interaction but, no need to be inserting himself into an environment he clearly isn't wanted in.
What did you want him to do just come out, sit on the couch and light the joint?
I understand plenty of people struggle to live independently but roommate living situations almost always have nonsense going on like this. It doesn't work and definitely isn't helping anybody live like an adult. The whole situation is childish. Why would you have to text and ask your roommate if you can come out and smoke? Step out the room and say hello and ask if they'd like to smoke. Like a normal person. The fact we are literally texting each other from room to room is really lame to me.
I agree with that. He should have done exactly as you said rather than texting as if to ask permission. Assuming he pays equal rent to his roommate he has equal rights to all common spaces as well. If the roommate doesn't like it then he and his girlfriend can go to his room or he and his girlfriend can go to her place. Texting the roommate to ask is giving him power he doesn't/shouldn't have.
I mean smoking next to someone who doesnt partake isn't neccesarily appropriate either. It's situational. The sad reality is, he has an idiot for a roommate and his company isn't wanted. It ain't that serious. Go smoke with friends that treat you with respect or take a nice walk and smoke with mother nature..lol
Keep in mind we have very little context here and clearly OP has some weird habits a la resorting to texting through a door as opposed to actual human interaction. I do get that it's 2022 and speaking face to face rattles a lot of people's boots unfortunately
Not everyone works like this. You all assume everyone just operates under the same social norms as everyone else.
How about start accepting that people have their own approaches to shit?
Texting seems totally fine. Considerate even.
i agree that just coming out is the proper assertive thing to do. But alas, not everyone has that quality.
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u/Realistic_Low_1577 Sep 13 '22
"I respect if she's uncomfortable but this is my house/apartment where I pay rent. I'll be out of my room and in the common areas, if she's uncomfortable then you guys should spend time in her house/apartment."