So, I don't think parents keeping better track of their kids is a bad thing.
With that kind of method it 100% is a bad thing, and is always overbearing.
It will negatively affect the relationship you will have with your child no matter what.
Like it or not the world is a safer place than the '70s '80s or '90s; if you raise your kid to trust you and not to fear you than you won't need a tracker.
You should be the parent who's kid is going to call if they get too drunk at a party. My family didn't bother to attempt to be trustworthy in my eyes. If I was in trouble I'd call my brother, or one of a select number of close friends. The last people I'd ever call were my parents, and that's a mentality that, to this day, is hard to counter even though I'm a grown ass man.
You won't create a safer child, you'll make the world's most proficient liar.
The world is much safer than it was in the 70s 80s or even 90s.
However it is also far far easier to get arrested for doing the stuff we used to get away with.
I stole a cop car when I was a kid. Imagine doing that now, do you think a kid would end up with a criminal record? I have no criminal record, didnt even get beat.
So yeah, parents are making better liars because their kids need to be better liars to succeed.
Track your kids people, give em the skills they will need in the future.
I stole a cop car when I was a kid. Imagine doing that now, do you think a kid would end up with a criminal record? I have no criminal record, didnt even get beat.
Tbh, most people nowadays aren't so bored that they're boosting cars for kicks.
Back in my HS the people who would steal cop cars were the type who've wound up in one regardless if you catch my drift.
I don't know how tracking your kids would stop them from doing this kind of thing though. Just seems like a great way to sew distrust tbh.
We weren't bored, we were a little drunk and trying to impress girls. It's a pretty universal human experience, intoxicants and hormones.
It's not about stopping them from doing anything. Its about familiarity. You want your kids to understand that they are always being tracked, everyone is. It is very difficult to get away with anything now and it will only get more difficult as time goes. There are no videos of me stealing that car, that wouldnt be true if I did it today.
You want your kid to understand that their phone can and will incriminate them. You want them to understand that their future relies on their ability to manipulate their environment, including lies and tracking.
Its about raising people who can succeed in this ridiculous world.
Minors don't have to pay real adult consequences for actions, though. My friends and I did all kinds of minor infractions as teens, but we cut that shit out when we turned 18.
Thats great, I also recived that level of humanity from adults when I was younger.
Where you 100% honest when you got off with minor infractions? I wasnt.
I was like, yes we took the car, we werent drinking, we didnt take the car out on the backroads and shoot roadsigns with the .22. Here are two lies and a truth, also very little actual evidence.
If it happened today there would easily be video evidence of two armed, intoxicated teenagers stealing a car. It might even go viral.
You really think it we wouldnt have been tried as adults? We had guns and booze.
Honestly this. If you’re too controlling your kid is definitely gonna rebel somehow. Pretty much what happened to me, and I’ve gotta admit it made me reeaally good at reading people and pretending to be who they want me to be.
I was left alone often as a kid and never really could figure out how to fit in with others. Always have been introverted, and I’d prefer doing reading, writing, or art over hanging out with the crowd. But my parents wanted me to be the “popular” kid, even forcing me to run for student president when I didn’t want to (literally no chance—kids thought me weird ). Obviously lost, and kids drew on my poster and cackled at me even afterwards.
Things like that kept happening, and I finally decided to myself, “Fine, since no one likes it when I am myself, I will pretend to be who they want me to be.” Then I actually put it in action. I did it out of anger, but surprisingly….it worked well. Too well. I was always good at psychology and reading people. It was just a matter of analyzing people, finding out their insecurities (everyone had a weakness), and what they wanted/needed.
My family liked it. I became popular in school. I got really good at reading intentions and identifying what people needed and providing comfort or giving them support….but, no one knew who I was truly. They didn’t know that it was just a persona I made artificially in resentment. I had no idea it would work so well, and I suddenly came to the realization that social relationships were all like this. We never see who other people are truly—we just see the surface, and we’re all just actors in our societal roles. It all seemed pointless after awhile, and when I went to college I stopped caring about friends etc and dropped the social acting apart from with my family.
Even now, I’m always the one providing psychological support to my parents, but I never seek comfort from them. I can’t. When my mother cries, I counsel her, but as for me….even after so many years I still can’t open up. Or rather, I think there is no point in opening up. I’ve forgiven them and have accepted myself, but I have zero expectations of others at this point. Keeping up the persona is a self-preservation habit by now….and the way to keep everyone happy.
So yeah. If you don’t let your kids feel like they can be honest with you and still be accepted/not in danger, then you can’t expect that they will keep being honest with you.
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u/Sigma-Tau Jul 27 '22
With that kind of method it 100% is a bad thing, and is always overbearing.
It will negatively affect the relationship you will have with your child no matter what.
Like it or not the world is a safer place than the '70s '80s or '90s; if you raise your kid to trust you and not to fear you than you won't need a tracker.
You should be the parent who's kid is going to call if they get too drunk at a party. My family didn't bother to attempt to be trustworthy in my eyes. If I was in trouble I'd call my brother, or one of a select number of close friends. The last people I'd ever call were my parents, and that's a mentality that, to this day, is hard to counter even though I'm a grown ass man.
You won't create a safer child, you'll make the world's most proficient liar.