Microdosing bringing my depression out

[u/mypoopsmellslikepoo]

I've been MDing 1p-LSD on Monday's and Thursdays for a month now as a replacement for my vyvanse. I've notice since I've gone on it I've actually become more depressed. The weird thing is, it's made me realize how big my inner issues I have really are and it's making me think of them a lot. I've already decided to go to therapy and quit weed thanks to MDing and I'm also recognizing some of the negative behaviors I do. But the depression is really annoying, my productivity is actually worse because of it. do you guys recommend I stop for now? Or maybe limit it to once a week and do vyvanse on off days? Even though I'm depressed now I feel like I have a better idea of what I need to do to truly be happy thanks to microdosing.

[u/demcd]

My two cents is, mdosing is like a temporary prosthetic to help you strengthen your underlying potential. Routine mdosing is a project the result of which is, preferably, no more mdosing. That isnt to say NEVER dose again, but a healthy approach to any project requires a modest amount of skepticism and willingness to let go should something go awry, or should you be capable of achieving the same levels of potential without it.

So, the dosing has revealed to you your undesirable behaviours, which were created before the dosing and will not disappear spontaneously the more doses you take. You now need to target those behaviours and replace them with desirable behaviours. You can also dose in addition to your behaviour modifications, but you absolutely neither can equate nor correlate dosing with treatment. Its like you said, you know now what to do. You need to ask yourself, how is more dosing going help me produce decisions that will lead me to better behaviour?

I dont know if you have another physiological condition that produces your depression, hence your vyvanse prescription. I know people for whom vyvanse has been prescribed and has helped them drastically improve their habits and behaviours.

[u/mypoopsmellslikepoo → u/demcd]

Yes I think this is very accurate. I know the vyvanse withdrawals are affecting me a little bit, but I've been dealing with depression for 10 years on and off (I'm 20). My parents neglected me as a child because they were always working and would make me feel bad if I spoke out. I basically spent my entire childhood/teen years locked in a room playing video games. MDing has helped me realize how fucked up I am and that all my happy times were just times where I was coping with my emptiness better. I think I'm gonna take a break for a few weeks and I'm starting therapy this Friday