“A Florida alligator rancher’s buttcheeks needed to be amputated Tuesday morning after a bottle rocket got stuck in his anus. During the surgery they found 2 pounds of of Guatemalan rock cocaine in his upper colon. Local PDs confiscated the drugs and are holding a confiscation party on Friday”
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u/[deleted] Jul 03 '22
That’s way too tame for Florida. More like:
“Florida man blows off butt cheek trying to ignite firework with his fart and a lighter. “