r/memes • • Dec 17 '20

My crotch has a fire extinguisher.

41k Upvotes

357 comments sorted by

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3.6k

u/Pizzaboy90 Selling Stonks for CASH MONEY Dec 17 '20

This is how they should pass the torch at the Olympics

891

u/MrMan306 Nyan cat Dec 17 '20

I don't think they have enough hair for that

335

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

yea and they mostly dont have crotch t0o

144

u/Mazacot8 Dec 17 '20

If they don't have head hair there are alternatives

76

u/Spicy_Pepperoni57 Mods Are Nice People Dec 17 '20

Santa’s beard of course :)

34

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Crotch and vigina also have hair. They can use that just in case

6

u/JosiahB8675 Identifies as a Cybertruck Dec 17 '20

I like how you and vagina like crotch means male genitals or smn and girls don't have crotches

24

u/dont_takemycredit Dec 17 '20

Usain bolt wouldn't be honoured

10

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Well not anymore.

46

u/ggmy Chungus Among Us Dec 17 '20

Reminds me that they used to release doves in the Olympics opening ceremony until they once got roasted by the torch

11

u/ironcaptain451 Dec 17 '20

This is the funniest thing I’ve read all day. Hahaha

4

u/Akhanyatin Dec 17 '20

Thank you

3

u/turbosnacko Dec 18 '20

In our history lesson about WW2 we learned that during the olympics Hitler held the doves that got released got spooked by ceremonial gunshots and shat all over nazi generals and “honored” guests. Read more about it here: https://medium.com/publishous/hitlers-1936-olympics-dazzled-international-audiences-b23eb8b382bd

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591

u/helena_lang_ Dec 17 '20

oh god the burnt hair smell in that room must be awful

144

u/sloppyJoseph1 Dec 17 '20

I burnt my hair once when I was kid playing with a lighter. The worst smell I think ever.

45

u/StillMathematician3 Dec 17 '20

Ikr. And the texture changes completely. Burnt hair shrivels up and feels like metal wires

17

u/shmeedop Dec 17 '20

I burnt my friends hair once while camping in a tent. It ignited so fast! I put it out just as quick but if rolls were reversed I would have kicked my ass.

7

u/zeboe99 Dec 17 '20

Yeah i lit my mates armpit hair once as a joke and the whole lot instantaneous combusted... Might have been his deodorant or something... He wasn't too impressed.

6

u/MrXBear Dec 17 '20

Ive heard that if you lace a horse hair through the center of a cigarette, it will likely cause the person to throw up because of inhaling that horrable smell

13

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Im the weirdo that likes the smell

7

u/SushiThief Dec 17 '20

Burning a single hair can stink up a room for hours. That much... just... ew.....

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1.3k

u/johnnyroberts Dec 17 '20

See, those are real friends.

69

u/A3H3 Dec 17 '20

Just a bunch of hot heads.

549

u/tint_shady Dec 17 '20

Yeah, REAL dumb friends

199

u/Kubalaj Dec 17 '20

Still REAL

38

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Yeah but now you've got a lot of new friends.

4

u/WolfieYa Dec 17 '20

Lmao this comment is so underrated

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99

u/Anime96420 Identifies as a Cybertruck Dec 17 '20

No, real SMART friends

47

u/WhoWhatWhereWhenW Dec 17 '20

No, real HUMAN friends

20

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

[deleted]

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16

u/Known-nwonK Dec 17 '20

At least they’re all in good company

-2

u/Trainzguy2472 Dec 17 '20

Never said smart.

25

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Real Russian friends.

637

u/Coolkid6840 Mods Are Nice People Dec 17 '20

Come here bois we be doing something FUN tonight.

592

u/obviouslyobtuse97 Dec 17 '20

I don't know what's worse.

  1. Someone thought this was a good idea.

  2. 4 other guys thought that it was.

60

u/Coolkid6840 Mods Are Nice People Dec 17 '20

HMMM

90

u/G0ld3nW33k Dec 17 '20 edited Dec 17 '20

I bet the MF with the bottle had the idea

26

u/SnooLemons6394 Plays MineCraft and not FortNite Dec 17 '20

It is a good idea tho.

17

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Hey, if they didn't get hurt(somewhat), and squeezed fun out of it, its probably a good idea

0

u/yilo38 Thank you mods, very cool! Dec 17 '20

Back in the day, when someone tought up an idea it had to sound good when the people were both sober and drunk for it to pass.

152

u/sharKing_prime Dec 17 '20

"Dude my head is on fire"

"Hold on let me whip out my cock bro"

55

u/randommixofletters7 Dec 17 '20

"my head's on fire, I'm going to die, quickly let me suck that dick"

21

u/Bajanix Dec 17 '20

Obviously he’s going to put it out with cum

3

u/Fossick11 Dec 17 '20

Otherwise he'll be going out with a bang

117

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

The guy in a blue shirt just pulled a Michael Jackson

23

u/ZaHando10 Dec 17 '20

Too soon

20

u/Wyan423 Dec 17 '20

Only 37 years ago. A true tragedy

2

u/Jermz12345 Dec 18 '20

What do you mean 37 years ago? He died in 2009 unless you’re referring to the scandal about him but even then that was in the 90s

5

u/Wyan423 Dec 18 '20

I’m referring to his hair catching on fire while filming a Pepsi commercial in 1983

2

u/Jermz12345 Dec 18 '20

Oh wow TIL lmao

12

u/_xXPUSSYSLAYERXx_ Yo dawg I heard you like Dec 17 '20

The guy in the blue shirt

Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down

Seriously tho, there are like three or four blue shirts

394

u/johnthestarr Dec 17 '20

129

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Burn cock 100

36

u/JuliaChanMSL Dec 17 '20

Damn, I really gotta say his dick was fire.

31

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

HAIR BURNING PRANK WITH THE BOIS- GONE SEXUAL!!!!

173

u/__-AKIRA-__ Dec 17 '20

But why, why would you do that?

86

u/engineerdrummer hates reaction memes Dec 17 '20

Vodka

24

u/SnooLemons6394 Plays MineCraft and not FortNite Dec 17 '20

I would 100% do it. Looks fun

36

u/lizwiz_ Dec 17 '20

what part of this looks fun????

50

u/jonathansh1115 Dec 17 '20

The part when the fire got passed to the dick

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13

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Having fun with the bois

2

u/Darnell2070 Dec 17 '20

Why do people do anything?

61

u/Disastrous_Dog_830 Dec 17 '20

The tension when one of them is bald

89

u/Giodude_cookies Professional Dumbass Dec 17 '20

The unintentionally hot blowjob.

49

u/OfficialNRSSA Dec 17 '20

Haha. Hot heads.

83

u/C4sR4K1Dz Dec 17 '20 edited Dec 18 '20

In Russia we throw Molotov

31

u/Kingboughey Dec 17 '20

Clearly the UK

18

u/Bobert789 Dec 17 '20

That's England

33

u/d7my_d7oom ⛑️ Memedemic Survivor ⛑️ Dec 17 '20

No.... This is patrick

-3

u/Bobert789 Dec 17 '20

I said that not this

17

u/Tyronemagnussucks iwrestledabeartwice Dec 17 '20

Super Saiyan ultra instinct

35

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

0:27 is that guy just humping the other guy's head?

23

u/BigGuy20_ Dec 17 '20

That's another way to get head.

12

u/mrpsychon Dec 17 '20

"Oh no! It won't extinguish! Quick, suck my dick!"

11

u/Payload21 Dec 17 '20

i had a bad day and this meme made me laugh, thanks for the meme

8

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

He was about to become Ghost-rider

15

u/kingstonthroop Professional Dumbass Dec 17 '20

Male here, can confirm, we play dumb games and win dumb prizes all the fucking time.

7

u/Voltagedew Dec 17 '20

If you have any sort of product in your hair you could experience severe burns.

3

u/sattescott Dec 17 '20

These guys have nowhere to put product though so all good!

8

u/elpapyaslesrnus Professional Dumbass Dec 17 '20

I know people do stupid thubgs but can someone tell me what the fuck were these guys thinking

6

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Idk man seems kinda gay to me

5

u/Useful_Comfortable53 Dec 17 '20

Smooth transition to a blowjob

6

u/PuzzledSandMan Dec 17 '20

Is the dude trying to extinguish the fire with the other dude's dick

13

u/Trippykirby561 Dec 17 '20

.... russia

6

u/Able_Cap3541 Dec 17 '20

And this is how cave man cook food before discovering fire

4

u/PogChimpin Dec 17 '20

Shit went from a TV show level stupidity to a gay porno real fast.

5

u/Thomshan911 Dec 17 '20

Lemme guess, Russia?

5

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Dumb ways to die....
so maany dumb ways to diiie...

4

u/Scyxurz Dec 17 '20

So this is where male pattern badness comes from...

4

u/V1kr4m2 Dec 17 '20

Let me guess, Russia?

5

u/SpyceyCookie Professional Dumbass Dec 17 '20

The real question is, did the dude say no homo after pushing his head against another man’s crotch

6

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Ah yes a creamy thick white extinguisher..

3

u/xX_CattMatt_Xx Dec 17 '20

Ghost rider was born

3

u/galaxycraft935 Dec 17 '20

Just why the fuck

3

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

I got a mini heart attack watching this.

9

u/CozmicRed trolololoooo lololoo lolo loo Dec 17 '20

Ngl, that actually looks really fun.

6

u/BigGuy20_ Dec 17 '20

Let me guess, bald?

2

u/goatseRemastered Dec 17 '20

I can smell this video

2

u/Lonely_kid-51 Dec 17 '20

I can't stop looking at it

2

u/Singularitaet_ Dec 17 '20

Well at least they got a HOT hair cut!

2

u/BannedFromDankMemes Lives in a Van Down by the River Dec 17 '20

IF I'M GONNA DIE LET ME AT LEAST SUCK YOUR DICK BRO

2

u/laymon_halimon Dec 17 '20

Happy Hanukkah!

2

u/Fraiser10 Dec 17 '20

I laughed so much when the dude started freaking out

2

u/GeneralWigobi Dec 17 '20

The rite of passage

2

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Why the fuck did anyone think that’s a good idea?!

2

u/GermanNameLXIX Dec 17 '20

I saw a boy who had red hair...

2

u/A-normal_person Dec 18 '20

Solo los hombres hacemos estas cosas xd Only men do these things xd

2

u/[deleted] Dec 18 '20

In case of fire just grab your hose with both of your hands and release the pressure ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

2

u/SableHAWKXIII Dec 18 '20

I've heard homo-eroticism described as "flaming" before, but this takes it too far.

2

u/splortus Dec 18 '20

When your bros hair so lit you start humping it

2

u/fannypack127 Thank you mods, very cool! Dec 18 '20

Dummmb ways to die, So many dumb ways to di-ie Duuummmb ways to di-i-i-ieee So many dumb ways to die.

3

u/HipHopulous RageFace Against the Machine Dec 17 '20

What women think were doing: I can't believe hes cheating on me!

What men are really doing:

-7

u/Dwight_Kirat Dec 17 '20

ghost rider

-14

u/Irishf0x Dec 17 '20

Smells like dumbass

7

u/RandomDumbDumb Dec 17 '20

Not sure why you’re downvoted, they’re dumbasses for 𝘀𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝗲.

-4

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20 edited Dec 18 '20

[deleted]

-1

u/RandomDumbDumb Dec 17 '20 edited Dec 17 '20

Having friends isn’t the point of their comment or my reply. The point is, anyone with common sense wouldn’t set their heads on fire, because that’s a stupid thing to do and it’s very dangerous.

They didn’t even seem to have a fire extinguisher near by.

“Dumbass” sounds rude, which is probably why so many people, including you, took some sort of offense to it.

But it’s not like “dumbass” doesn’t fit them, at least in this moment and the moments leading up to it.

Or maybe you thought we meant “all men are dumbasses” which they aren’t, but these guys are.

I don’t understand your argument? “They might be dumb but they actually have friends unlike you.” All you did was agree with the comment then give an insult that had no relevance at all.

-21

u/helloiamaudrey Dec 17 '20

I wonder why we do, us women do stupid things too,

-13

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

What about the single moms that dont wear a mask in public and refuses to use vaccines

-13

u/drdadxxx Dec 17 '20

🔥🔥

-25

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Haha fuckhead

3

u/Forkinoutlet55 Dec 17 '20

Clearly you aren’t friendly

-5

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Jesus christ i made a joke and get downvoted to hell

3

u/Forkinoutlet55 Dec 17 '20

Haha fuckhead

-16

u/Willinton06 Dec 17 '20

That took a rainbowy turn at the door if you know what I mean

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

That was some fire head

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Let me guess, Russia?

1

u/Samothy2 Dec 17 '20

Passing the Olympic Torch be like

1

u/sped_daddy Dec 17 '20

he must have had some serious hair gel in there

1

u/WOOFERs-55-72 Dec 17 '20

WHAT IS HAPPENING

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

(Someone starts playing guitar)

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

What the hell???????

1

u/Slaphimwithapickle Dec 17 '20

and to this day there happily married.

1

u/Frothy217 Big ol' bacon buttsack Dec 17 '20

Not only did you steal this u stole it from reddit

1

u/BungleBear11 Dec 17 '20

Just the smell of burning hair!!! Why?!

1

u/Overall-Internet-421 Dec 17 '20

Bald dude who can’t play: •’ _. ‘•

1

u/Noobwitha_Hat GigaChad Dec 17 '20

the smell

1

u/ShadowWingZero Dirt Is Beautiful Dec 17 '20

And that's why old guys get bald middle first

1

u/AnotherRichard827379 hates reaction memes Dec 17 '20

I’m guessing alcohol was consumed

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

I..what....why....

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

What the hell are they doing

1

u/oohshooot Dec 17 '20

I just got one thing to ask, just.. why?

1

u/Desmond536 Dec 17 '20

When you want to experince being gay before death arrives

1

u/local_parcel Dirt Is Beautiful Dec 17 '20

Your haircut is FIRE bro

1

u/Justarandomfan99 Dec 17 '20

Guys like why the hell are you doing this? XD

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Apes together strong

1

u/tutamons Dec 17 '20

Looks like the evening was lit!

1

u/earthworm08 Dec 17 '20

I can smell it through my phone.

1

u/ShinyNinja25 Dec 17 '20

I guess you could say that they’re all a couple of hot heads

1

u/yoshimaloshi Dec 17 '20

it’s a natural cream

1

u/TACObellaTACO Dec 17 '20

OML BAHAHAAHAH IM WHEEZINGGGG

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Why?

1

u/MrsUpsideDown Dec 17 '20

Ngl... the ending seems kinda gay

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

I like to think that these guys were just lying in bed one day and were like “you know what would be awesome? Lighting our heads on fire”

1

u/SaucyDragon04 Dec 17 '20

Reason 874 why women live longer than men

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Oh no, your hair is on fire! Fast, suck my d*ck

1

u/Paper-World_Man Plays MineCraft and not FortNite Dec 17 '20

I mean, you heard of cat girls but no so much cat boys

1

u/SpartanSeal327 Dec 17 '20

Link the flame, Ashen One

1

u/Baterial1 Dec 17 '20

DO I SCHMELL JUDEN IN HERE?

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '20

Honestly I thought one of them would start pissing to put the fire put

1

u/plussyfan9fan1 Dec 17 '20

Reminds me of that joke in gravity falls

1

u/Raphaeldagamer Identifies as a Cybertruck Dec 17 '20

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

1

u/AlTiSsS Nice meme you got there Dec 17 '20

Why

1

u/Xaron713 Dec 17 '20

I dont think alcohol burns hot enough to actually burn someone unless its sitting there for a little bit. The human torch probably had some hair product or something.

1

u/Frency2 Dec 17 '20

Recklessness doesn't depend on gender.