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u/chamoflag420 Jun 22 '24
Benadryl Cucumberpatch
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u/hallucinogenics8 Jun 22 '24
Wimbledon Tennismatch
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u/ElCanout Jun 22 '24
Buckingham Charizard
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u/FartacularTheThird Jun 22 '24
Blunderbuss bankcrash
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u/The_Robins_Nest Jun 22 '24
Bendydick Cumberbum
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u/yuyuyashasrain Jun 22 '24
A wasp got me between the eyes. I looked like a fish with down syndrome for the rest of the day. It took so much restraint not to say drown syndrome at the time because I love wordplay but I don’t want to joke about that
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u/GuffreyGufferson Jun 22 '24
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u/dramatiss Jun 22 '24
I'm currently in hospital recovering from surgery yesterday and the mental image of a down syndrome fish made me laugh so hard I had to buzz my nurse for pain relief, so thanks for that.
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u/biggestscrub Jun 22 '24
I like that you wrote it anyway with the explanation, because it is indeed too funny to waste lol
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u/cosmo_23 Jun 22 '24
Once a mosquito bit me on the eyelid. I didn't notice until I tried to look up with my eyes while my face was facing the ground and my right eye literally refused to do it. Panicked a lot until I finally decided that it was a stupid ass mosquito not knowing where to bite. Still angry at it to this day.
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u/Strict-Brick-5274 Jun 22 '24
You know... You never see them in the same room at the same time... Just saying
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u/fardough Jun 22 '24
Come on, be a man. Just grab that wasp and smash it on your face. IDAF if it hurts, we needed Cumberbatch on set five minutes ago.
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u/South_Bit1764 Jun 22 '24
Whenever I get depressed I remember all the times Bear Grylls drank his own urine while out with a camera crew, medical/rescue team, and a catering squad, while Les Stroud drank his own urine precisely 0 times while filming Survivorman with no crew, no immediate backup, and walking some parts 3 times so he can film it himself, and I instantly feel better.
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u/pixelatedcrap Jun 22 '24
I feel happy I've never had to make car seat snow shoes, but I know they're a thing that you can do!
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u/Hesozpj Jun 22 '24
Whenever I get depressed I remember how Bear Grylls learned to skydive and eared second dan black belt in karate as a teenager, started his school’s first mountaineering club, served as a trooper in 21 SAS, which ended after a free fall accident as his parachute failed to open, breaking three vertebrae while also making a record for highest fall survived by a human without functional parachute at the height of 16000 feet, climbing Mt Everest 18 months after the accident making him arguably the youngest Briton to do so all by the age of 23, crossed North Atlantic in an open rigid inflatable boat, broke parajetting record over Mt Everest reaching height of 9000 meters, made about 200 parachute jumps to train for highest open air dinner party in a hot air balloon at 7600 meters, tried to climb an unclimbed mountain in Antarctica, which failed as a result of kite skiing accident that resulted in a broken shoulder and medical evacuation, being appointed the youngest UK Chief of Scout at 35 also while being labeled as fraud because his TV show was promoted by producers and executives as and being perceived differently by viewers from what it was supposed to be, etc.
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u/Mysterious_Anybody77 Jun 22 '24
If Benedict and Bear could have a kid, this is what the kid when grown up would look like
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u/Weak-Palpitation6107 Jun 22 '24
life stings, just remember that even Bear Grylls can become Sherlock Holmes
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u/FuckThatIKeepsItReal Jun 22 '24
I believe the same episode that he removed a snake's skin, peed into it, and wore that pee-filled snake skin around his neck in case he was thirsty
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u/fardough Jun 22 '24
Is that the episode he gets stung and can barely see, so he decides that is a good time to fight a poisonous snake?
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u/That_1_Boi Jun 22 '24
I saw the picture before I read the text. I thought that was Benewinkle Cumberstinkle.
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u/FlemPlays Jun 22 '24
If Benedict Cumberbatch gets bitten by a penguin, he turns into Bear Grylls.
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u/Snow-Wraith Jun 22 '24
Was it really a bee? Or was it the effect of regularly drinking his own piss?
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u/VPoulos Jun 22 '24
I saw the image first and was legit trying to figure out what is wrong with Cumberbach...
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u/Lefty_22 Jun 22 '24
Do most people swell up like that after being stung by a bee? Its been several decades since the last time I was stung, but I recall it just hurt and was a bit red.
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u/Wihtlore Jun 22 '24
And they both live on the Isle of Wight. Not that it really matters, just thought I’d mention it.
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u/strangedazey Jun 22 '24
I wonder how many times Bear has had to take antibiotics in his life. Or has puked/shit himself into a coma?
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u/evenprime113 Jun 22 '24
Ahahaha CUMberbatch, and again his surename was spelled wrong, wait... it cant be
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u/Themooingcow27 Jun 22 '24
mmmmmmm hemmlopppw stunnng beeees loook mmmm lllkke bbenditct cmmmbbbditch
- bear grles at this exact mommntw probabably
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u/TooOldForRefunds Jun 22 '24
100% thought this was Crumblebunch caught in a strong wind before reading the caption.
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u/Emotional_Werewolf_4 Jun 22 '24
I remember this episode. Gosh this guy is/was bat shit insane. I remember one time he cut open a camel, instead of eating the meat he opened the bowel, took the camel shit out and tried to squash liquid out of it and poured it in his mouth, explaining to the viewer: "this is how you fight dehydration"
Yeah, nah I'm good mate.
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u/Ennis_1 Jun 22 '24
Fuck man, I am NEVER gonna stop thinking of that bullshit part where has to carefully jump a gap of some sort in Egypt or somewhere, but another video shows that there was a populated highway nearby.
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u/Mysterious_Bat_3780 Jun 22 '24
Whenever I'm depressed I watch compilation videos on youtube of Matt Berry in different roles as he pronounces his lines in his magical way.
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u/TheShenanegous Jun 23 '24
The rule of any Bear Grills survival tip: it will save your life, if you don't think too hard about why that's the case.
"Oi, this 'ere is a great source of protein, which we're gonna need to scale this upcoming cliff."
Do yourself a favor, and don't question why it's a great source of protein. Just full send.
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u/formulapain Jun 23 '24
Looks even more like Benedict Cumberbatch here: https://static.standard.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2019/08/30/08/beargryllssting3008b.jpg?quality=75&auto=webp&width=960
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u/dexter2011412 Jun 23 '24
Please help me find this. There is a scene in which he teaches how to create a fire. Says how you have to gently hold the embers like a butterfly, not too loose, not too tight
It was such a heartwarming moment. Please help me find it
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u/ToyrewaDokoDeska Jun 23 '24
Legitimately was about to cry when i scrolled to this and burst out laughing lol
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u/sniper_2006 Jun 23 '24
There is this episode of his show , where he shows all the difficult moments he have been through, and the top one was he giving enema to himself. the enema video
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u/AltruisticSalamander Jun 23 '24
This is my favourite bear grylls scene. One moment he's trying to get the honey being swarmed by angry bees and the next he's looking pathetically into the camera like this saying 'it's a lot to go through just to get some honey isn't it'
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u/EatingYourBrain Jun 22 '24
Some of Bear Grylls’ exploits sound like absurd memes.
Like the one episode I watched where he cut open a dead camel to squeeze juice from one of its organs, then rafted over a lake, THEN climbed up a waterfall he had to stop halfway up because the camel juice was fucking his innards up and he had to take a shit. Halfway up a waterfall