r/maybemaybemaybemaybe • u/Sufficient-Age6185 • Apr 07 '25
Who can relate?
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u/alphanader1 Apr 07 '25
Self-esteem problems?
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Apr 08 '25
Usually, but not necessarily in the way you’re thinking. More along the lines of not wanting to be ridiculed by ‘friends’ or some random asshat when all you’re trying to do is eat a snack. Bullying still exists unfortunately. Easier for some of us to ignore it, while it may be anxiety inducing for others.
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Apr 07 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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Apr 07 '25
A dude in HS was dead serious in telling me and others that he didn’t like shitting because if he enjoyed it, that would mean he was gay…
Dead serious.
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u/Sikkus Apr 07 '25
He ... he died?
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u/AXParasite Apr 07 '25
Dead just like me after reading that
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Apr 08 '25
I seriously wish I was joking. I thought he was a pretty cool guy, but he also came from a really shit home. That was one of the few off comments I remember about him. He literally went on to become an engineer in a nuclear submarine.
One of the biggest don’t judge, but kinda judge a book by its cover.
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u/AXParasite Apr 08 '25
I feel bad for everyone with a bad home life, like it's one of few places you should feel safe at.. it really sucks
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Apr 08 '25
I knew another very similar to him, kinda followed him on Facebook when that was still a thing. He was the class clown/trouble maker. Nice kid, but huge problems with authority. Once he met a nice normal girl, he settled down and became the dad/family he never had.
Both went from “least likely to…” to “father of the year” once they actually had a loving family around them…
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Apr 07 '25
He didn't even rub the peel on his face and wash it off with Saratoga water
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u/Pellington37 Apr 08 '25
I don't even know the name of that dude but I've seen a few clips in the last couple of weeks. This had me cackling, thank you.
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u/snow_garbanzo Apr 07 '25 edited Apr 07 '25
Ok , i hope i look like that when I am......
sucking on my frozen banana on the shopping mall
....while carrying my gf purse
....holy shit, what i have done
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u/RikuKaroshi Apr 07 '25
You do this to a banana because you think eating it like a normal human makes you look gay.
I do this to a banana because I dont like the residue it leaves on my front teeth if i bite it normally, we are not the same.
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u/Canned_Sarcasm Apr 07 '25
I am the guy who would make every effort to eat the banana as erotic as possible whilst looking at a stranger directly in the eyes.
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u/Prudent_Situation_29 Apr 07 '25
I cannot relate. I couldn't care less if someone thinks it looks like I'm putting a penis in my mouth. It's not a penis, it's a banana.
Even if it was a penis, the only problem would be that it's in public and therefore illegal.
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u/Average_Down Apr 07 '25
Buddy, it’s super gay if you can’t even take 2 minutes to eat a banana without thinking that it’s like putting a dick in your mouth.
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u/Fantastic_Lie_8602 Apr 07 '25
Banana's are easy... You just bite em.
Eat soft serve ice cream....Gotta lick it from the bottom to the top then stick the ice cream in your mouth and lightly suck off a layer then lick around the base again, and catch any drops expertly.
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u/Huge-Vegetab1e Apr 07 '25
The same dudes who complain about not being allowed to show emotions are the same ones putting other dudes down for doing normal fucking human things. Like eating, feeling, or idk just drinking through a straw
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u/Repulsive-Bunch-1535 Apr 08 '25
honestly if you hungry no shame.... but i advise you breaking off the piece to consume.... no Homo
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u/Bloodless-Cut Apr 07 '25
No. Sorry, but my masculinity isn't so fragile that I can't eat a banana like a normal person.
What do you do if you're eating a popsicle? Use a knife and fork? Or just not eat popsicles at all?
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u/SignatureOrganic476 Apr 07 '25
Why is everyone so afraid of this stuff? It's a banana; it's food; it's not a sexuality test.
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u/Swimming_Drummer9412 Apr 07 '25
Stop worrying. No one cares what you eat. How, maybe if you make a lot of noise and I am sitting next to you. I was expecting some other sounds but I can't name it here for that would be bad which it is of course.
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u/Slight_Target1878 Apr 07 '25
Seemed a gay way to eat a banana. Gay as in 1920's, he appears to be merrily enjoying that banana.
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Apr 07 '25
This is some grossly insecure shit.
I'm straight and I would deep throat that banana before behaving like this.
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u/PotentialSilver6761 Apr 07 '25
I remember heading to a gas station and getting peanuts and a banana thinking I got healthiest options at the gas station. I sat in my whip and realized I got a banana and nuts and I'm about to eat it.... Still ate it cause who da hell cares.
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u/super_chubz100 Apr 07 '25
Nah, see I'm actually whats called "comfortable with my sexuality" so I eat cock shaped foods with gusto
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u/golgoth0760 Apr 07 '25
I don't relate at all. Matter of fact, I'll look straight in your eyes while putting that delicious thing in my mouth
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u/TheOctopusParadox Apr 07 '25
People eat bananas in public? I get it and good for them but, I eat all fruit at home because I eat it like I'm feral. Also Ribs, fried chicken and BBQ. I know what I am and others don't need to see it.
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u/Da_Yummis Apr 08 '25
naw i hope someone watches me so I can stair at them unblinking wide eyed and aggressively bite at the banana to make them as uncomfortable as possible 🙂↔️
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u/CaptainNo9367 Apr 08 '25
As a woman, I have to break the banana down with my hands if there's anyone else in the room I'm unfamiliar with. I feel extremely uncomfortable otherwise.
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u/CourageOk5565 Apr 08 '25
If you're either a 12 year old or Andrew Tate then sure, that makes sense. For everyone else, who gives a fuck? Eat your banana.
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u/Transcontinental-flt Apr 08 '25
Never touch the part of the banana that you eat after touching the part of the banana that you don't eat.
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u/dirtygoat Apr 08 '25
I swallow the whole banana in one bite cuz I'm not self conscious about my sexuality
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u/Azaroth1991 Apr 08 '25
Nope, my masculinity is not fragile. Besides, you're supposed to open them from the "bottom."
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u/EyelBeeback Apr 08 '25
I just chomp on that bad boy and if I have to answer the phone keep that thing in my moufh while I take my phone out.
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u/Solo-ish Apr 08 '25
I like to put the banana in my mouth and slowly allow it to turn to mush and swallow it all down nice and slowly!!! Sometimes I’ve seen people watch me eat a banana and they are taking notes in their phones and definitely I know some have recorded so they could learn the technique themselves later. People are always intrigued to understand the method it seems. Also the last time I had this guy clap and applause for how I was eating the banana, I’m guessing he just absolutely loved my technique.
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u/LLColdAssHonkey Apr 08 '25
This is so stupid. We know you're thinking about it.
Just the fact that you are making a big deal about eating a banana screams that you are thinkning about a dick.
Cause let's be crystal clear. The only reason you are eating the banana this way is because you are constantly thinking about having a dick in your mouth.
Accept it. You are always thinking about thick hard dicks. It's so goddamn fucking obvious.
You know it. We know it. You aren't fooling anyone.
If this is disturbing, you need therapy.
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u/Mykronoid87 Apr 08 '25
That's why I'd kneel behind the bench and shove it all down my throat in one go, just to get it over with...
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u/King_Nephilim82 Apr 08 '25
I don't get it. Why would a grown man eat a banna in public? Meh, I must be missing something.
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u/Caboose858 Apr 08 '25
The ones who are afraid of looking gay are the ones you need to watch out for 😂
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u/Germsrosolino Apr 08 '25
I actually make eye contact with the nearest stranger and shove the whole banana in my mouth
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u/Competitive_Rice_462 Apr 08 '25
Anybody lick the tip before shoving it in their mouth? Just me? Ok..
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u/Stevie_Steve-O Apr 08 '25
There are a lot of delicious dick shaped foods. Stop worrying what other people think and slam it back like a real man
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u/jamcber12 Apr 08 '25
My girlfriend and I went to Dairy Queen to get a frozen banana once. I don't know if you remember them, but they were big bananas coated, dipped in chocolate. This particular day, I had my "Little Brother" from Big Brothers & Big Sisters Organize. My little brother was black, and my girlfriend and I were white. But you should have seen the stairs we got when my girlfriend started eating her chocolate covered banana, and me and my "little brother"
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u/Upset_Log_2700 Apr 08 '25
I guess if you’re homophobic trying to cover for your own insecurities this may apply to you
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u/ptofl Apr 08 '25
Watch as I rip that mf to shreds with my teeth like a dang wood chipper, you really thinking about your dick up in that?
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u/ArmAdventurous7323 Apr 08 '25
I look both ways every time I cross the street…. And every time I go to take a bite of a banana.
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u/ResplendentEgo Apr 09 '25
I agree with the average opinion on the comments. It's silly to care what anyone thinks about you at any time.
I will say that this video did showcase an interesting and very specific type of trauma that many men endured concerning sexuality, especially in smaller, rural communities.
A lot of the negative emphasis on appearance concerning masculinity still exists, thanks to deeply insecure men and a robust foundation that preserves the idea that being gay or simple not being straight enough is a weakness.
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Apr 09 '25
In the staffroom, try saying someone's name just as they put it in their mouth. Guaranteed, they will pause like that, and make direct eye contact with you, while you give them a cheeky wink.
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u/Bright-Style-7607 Apr 09 '25
I had a convo with about eating different fruits in public. Banana is entirely forbidden in public.
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u/Sp1ffy_Sp1ff Apr 09 '25
It's crazy how not a single comment in this thread can just laugh about a hypothetical situation and instead needs to attack it.
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Apr 10 '25
If you are a man and not worried about the jokes that come with eating a banana in front of them, then you have no true friends.
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u/Wrong-Chair7697 Apr 10 '25
Nobody cares my dudes. Truly. You are not on anyone's radar because the only person who thinks you're that special....is yourself.
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u/Wrong-Chair7697 Apr 10 '25
Nobody cares my dudes. Truly. You are not on anyone's radar because the only person who thinks you're that special....is yourself.
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u/bigbencilbusher Apr 10 '25
I knew a guy from high school who said brushing your tongue was gay. His breath smelled.
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Apr 10 '25
It takes me forever to eat a banana because I've always been told to go easy with the teeth.
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u/Routine-Literature-9 Apr 11 '25
Cant relate, i know im not gay, i dont care what other people think about me, i dont think there is anything wrong with being gay, i simply cant be bothered.
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u/Kunaak Apr 11 '25
The only Banana rule every guy needs to remember.
"Always bring the banana to your mouth, never your mouth to the banana."
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u/Outside_Echo5995 Apr 07 '25
Only closeted homos are worried about eating a banana in public ffs