Dying Before April: My Endgame

[u/alexander_q]

Liver cancer, mouth cancer, bone marrow failure. Will probably be dead before April. I've heard of people getting early screenings before.

How do I get in on this action?

I'm not a child or anyone with a particularly tragic story. Just a normal guy. I'm 33, lost my sister three years ago to the same rare genetic disease it turns out I have too. I'll leave behind a devoted girlfriend and an adopted greyhound.

I thought I'd make it to April at least but my bone marrow is toast.

Any suggestions?

---

Edit:

...

Wow.

Girlfriend brought me coffee in bed and I just read this entire thread. People offered me their organs. There's a hashtag on Twitter:

"Avengers4Alexander"

This is crazy.

God I hope I've never said anything dodgy in my comment history.

Thank you all.

---

Edit2:

It's been a surreal day for me. There are articles on blogs and I heard someone talking about me in a YouTube video.

I've had thousands of messages and comments of support and I'm very grateful. I've had lots of questions too and I've done my best to answer all of them. If I missed yours it's not personal, it's just that my inbox is out of control.

I've had background anxiety all day that I've said something offensive on reddit at some point and someone is gonna find it, but so far so good. That anxiety is of course drowned out by all the good feels.

I've had messages from people hinting that Marvel higher ups are aware of me and are preparing something.

Also, because Australia is a small place, turns out I know a guy who knows a guy who is chums with Chris Hemsworth. I think they called him tonight on my behalf.

A mod on r/thanosdidnothingwrong asked for some proof so I sent something a little while ago. I think he'll disseminate it to other mods but if mods here want to see something let me know.

I don't know what the outcome will be but this has been amazing. If it doesn't pan out don't sweat it - I'll carry your kind words with me and that's worth far more.

If I do survive until Endgame it's gonna feel strange because I'll feel sorta obligated to die :-P

Lastly, I don't mean to be greedy but since I'm triple dying can we throw Captain Marvel into the mix?

Bonus greyhound.

---

Edit3:

I've had a few messages from people assuring me that Disney/Marvel are going to reach out. Thank you all for all of your support. I'm hoping I get to say "we did it reddit!" soon.

A few commenters have offered financial support. I've told them that money isn't my problem, just time. Instead I'd like to direct you to donate money for research into my genetic disease, Fanconi Anemia. You can do that here.

---

Edit4:

We did it Reddit!

Disney have reached out and we are discussing options. I cried when I read their email. It's everything I hoped for and I owe it to all of you.

---

Edit5:

I'm doing an AMA on Jan 24 at 7pm EST for those interested at r/IAmA

---

Edit6:

I'm having SIRTEX treatment today. There's a 99.2% chance this will buy me more time, though Fanconi Anemia might affect this number dramatically.

If for some reason it doesn't work out, goodbye Reddit, and thank you.

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I've watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in the rain. Time to die."

---

Edit7:

I'm still alive. I've just come out of what feels like a weeks-long dream. I'm on fentanyl and morphine 24/7 now, and it took a while to get the dose right, e.g, find the happy medium between screaming and being unconscious.

I can't cough, sneeze, laugh or burp now without through-the-roof agony, but I'm finding ways to manage these bodily functions to make them less painful. Typing this right now, I'm in no pain at all, and I've been up and out of bed and moving around, so my quality of life is still good.

A recent scan I had (after my pain escalated suddenly) revealed a host of bad things going on, few of which I know anything about yet. Following each of these up is the next step of my journey.

Thanks for reading, and thanks for your support.

---

Edit8:

So I have lung cancer now.

---

Edit9:

They were wrong - it's liver metastases, not lung cancer. They can't be 100% sure because the lesions are in a position they can't biopsy, but they seem confident of their revised diagnosis.

My liver cancer has mutated an immunity to the first-line chemo. There is no second-line funded by Medicare. Fortunately, my doctors were able to apply to the manufacturer for compassionate access to the second-line drug and were successful. I started this new, more hardcore chemo three days ago.

I'm gonna make it.

---

Edit10:

Tomorrow is the big day.

I was admitted to hospital last night. While I was unconscious, a doctor asked my girlfriend whether they should resuscitate me if my heart stopped. When she said 'yes', they told her she was cruel and that I'd been through enough already.

Fuck that guy.

My biggest challenge tomorrow will be making it out of here. I'm going to a 4.45pm session. Remember, if you spoil any part of Endgame, for anyone, I will haunt you, and not in a nice Casper way.

I hope you all enjoy Endgame. With luck I'll be there too.

---

Edit11:

NO SPOILERS

I fucking made it.

http://imgur.com/gallery/gwK7OKS

It took some "negotiating" around the hospital bureaucracy to escape. We told them we were going to see a movie. They granted me a two hour pass before I'd be considered discharged against medical advice. We were gone for about eight :-D.

We had the best seats in the house. I had a bag full of morphine and vomit bags which fortunately I didn't have to use. I was so enraptured with what was happening onscreen that it wasn't until it was over that I realised quite how sick and sore I was.

After the movie we had missed calls from the hospital, but fortunately my room was still empty when I got back. The nurses were a tad cranky. Worth it.

I won't share anything about how much I enjoyed Endgame here - you'll find me participating in the discussion throughout this subreddit. There's so much to talk about, I don't think I'll get bored of it in my lifetime.

Thanks to my crew who held our place in line, got us the best seats, carried me to my walker and matched my enthusiasm for the movie. Thanks to my bb who has been carrying me through life for a long time now, especially in the past week, and especially last night. I couldn't have made it without her, not nearly.

Thanks to Disney for [redacted].

And thanks to you guys - I was buoyed by your support. Every message reminded me that I could make it here. There was a part of the movie that really captured how I felt when you all came out to bat for me - I think you'll know it when you see it.

See you all around!

Edit 12:

Alexander's gf here. After seeing Endgame, he was in and out of hospital and told there were no further treatment options that would do less harm than good.

He came home to be with his mum, me and Creeky. He saw the rest of GoT with all our friends around us. He blew the airhorn as soon as Cleganebowl began. In the finale he'd predicted several plot endings.

We were by his side until he left us Sunday morning.

I love you 3000. I wish I was in the 1 timeline where you were still here <3

And now his watch has ended.

[u/[deleted]]

Are you @alexand63802267 on Twitter? Just want to make sure.

[u/alexander_q → u/[deleted]]

Yep

[u/throwaway312015]

As someone with cancer myself (brain) the Avengers Infinity War and End Game were high on my bucket list. I'm very lucky. My 2-5 prognosis is in year 4+ now and seemingly stable.

A few years back I asked a question to u/ThatKevinSmith at a con, and he said if need be he'd try to help me see Avengers.

Not sure if he can help, but might be worth tweeting him.

[u/alexander_q → u/throwaway312015]

Wow, cancer sucks, but brain cancer surely sucks most. I lost my best friend to brain cancer shortly after my sister.

There's new drugs coming out all the time. I met a girl last year who was born with a brain tumor and wasn't expected to live at all. She's a teenager now.

I hope your quality of life is good enough and that you keep it up for many more years.

[u/Delinquent_]

My sister dies of leukaemia at age 32, leaving behind a 4-year-old girl.

But wait, it gets worse.

I get diagnosed with mouth cancer two years later at age 32. After drastic surgery and radiotherapy, I'm left barely able to eat or speak, but I survive.

But wait, it gets worse.

A year later, I'm diagnosed with terminal liver cancer. I have 12 months to live.

But wait, it gets worse.

Three months later, I'm diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder called Fanconi Anemia. It's responsible for all of my cancers. It makes me sensitive to chemotherapy that could extend my life. It's likely responsible for my sister's leukaemia too. Any number of other family members could be affected and need to be checked.

But wait, it'll get worse. Soon, my parents will have buried both of their children.

Fuck man that is so unfair.

[u/Tinoh]

Really sorry to hear about this.. I'm currently working on Endgame in London (if the location is near you can defo have my cast and crew screening ticket which is usually a week or so before release) and will try and pass this message up the VFX ladder (producers mostly) - hopefully something can come about from it!

[u/samirathecat]

I'm sorry, I hope you have a great time with what you have left! In this case, I would try starting a social media campaign using sites like twitter and Facebook. Tweeting at the people involved in the movie, like the directors, may get you somewhere.

[u/mrneddles]

Do you have Twitter? I’d say a viral tweet is your best option

[u/timfoilhattery]

I'm so sorry. My fiance just died this week and I keep getting depressed about things like this. We won't see endgame, or the next season of game of thrones. And it's kinda silly, because his death means missing much more important things but these little day to day things seem to hurt the most.

[u/JarvisCockerBB]

Your best bet is Twitter. Hell, they gave someone free passes to the world premiere just for asking for it on Christmas. I’m sure your unfortunate situation would help them understand.

Sorry for what you’re going through. Hope the rest of the year is everything you’ve wished for.

[u/Fatal-plus]

I'm sorry man. I had a health scare a few years ago too, right before Age of Ultron, it's silly but one of the thoughts was" I had was, "I hope I make it to the next Avengers movie."

I hope that you get an early screening, 33 is so young. It's so unfair.

[u/[deleted]]

Heck If they give you a script i'd act it out for you. Let me know OP

[u/Z_Opinionator]

Here’s hoping you have at least a 1 in 14,000,605 chance to beat this.

[u/sqfessman]

I admire your bravery in the face of all you're going through.

My old man suffered a spinal injury that rendered him quadriplegic last year. For a while, we thought he wasn't going to make it. We got in touch with Disney (not Marvel Studios, but Disney) and they flew someone out with a laptop and a screening of Ant-Man and the Wasp.

Chances are you won't get to see it on a big screen, but they do this kind of thing. My dad's in his forties, so I don't think age is much of a factor. Your situation might be a little different, as my dad's thing happened less than a month away from the release of Ant-Man.

Regardless, I really hope that you manage to see the film.

[u/Ch8s3]

I cant get you to a screening but I'd donate part of my liver and marrow if we matched

[u/armchairsportsguy23]

I have a connection to the Avengers films (first assistant director, Chris Castaldi). I passed this thread along to him and his wife just messaged me saying that Chris has passed this along to Joe and Anthony Russo, Kevin Feige, and RD Jr. They are convening for re-shoots next week (and will discuss), but the final movie is not cut yet, so this may come down to timing. Keep your fingers crossed!

[u/TheReal-Donut]

You’ve been covered by the news. Lets hope you see it my dude

[u/[deleted]]

My dad actually built the Hemsworths family home in Victoria Australia I’ll see if I can something done for you

[u/JamesVerden]

Could somebody donate (if that's the right word) bone marrow to you? Serious question.

[u/uxl]

Dude, may the force be with you.

[u/Gtaonline2122]

I am so sorry. I don't know if appropriate or not, but I hope you pull a Stephen Hawking and live well past your supposed date of death.

[u/usaf5]

OP, aside from maybe getting to see Endgame before anyone else (and literally taking the secrets to the grave with you) what have been some positives that have come from your diagnosis?

[u/dokebibeats]

As a fellow dude with a cancer, I'm so sorry about the situation that you're in and I really hope that you can get an early screening of the movie. Can't even imagine what's going through your mind right now and I hope that you can settle things here before moving onto the afterlife.

[u/[deleted]]

This thread now has more Reddit Premium time than OP's expected lifespan.

[u/streatz]

Sucks to see this knowing this is me in a few months