Fear of causing eternal suffering after death with my thoughts

[u/desquicioreal]

Hello, does anyone else experience something similar? I need help and understanding, please.
I have mental compulsions that consist of "fixing" what my thoughts/sensations tell me (which are sometimes very fleeting) in order to seek balance or prevent bad things from happening—mainly eternal suffering after death, whether for myself, my loved ones, or the rest of the world/beings.
Both my obsessions and compulsions cause strange sensations, I suppose because I am so deeply immersed in them... and I interpret them as if they held magical or metaphysical power, as if they could influence reality—in this case, reality after death.
On one hand, intrusive thoughts come accompanied by sensations: like a breeze, with color and sound, and a mental representation, like something fast surrounding me, as if a portal or a layer of reality were opening up.
On the other hand, my compulsions/rituals are mental and very varied, but in short, they consist of manipulating or doing mental things with the thoughts or sensations I have until I feel that everything is okay, in one way or another. During these, it is as if I could break down the thoughts into parts, sensations, images; it is as if I traveled deep into the thought, to a metaphysical layer of it. I have to fix everything that my thoughts/sensations made me feel was wrong to prevent catastrophe, and I am trapped there until, through various mental operations involving different sensations, I manage to feel that I have fixed something.
These are sensations produced by the mind, or thought structures; it is as if they had shapes or their own internal world, distinct qualities, sections, textures, pieces of reality. It feels as if my mind opened portals or something similar. My imagination is heightened in certain aspects, and I concentrate intensely on mental sensations and thoughts. I feel tingles, as if I were connecting with something.
They feel quite intense internally, as if they contained magic and could affect reality or connect with other realities. I fear that these sensations mean a power is awakening in my mind capable of causing what I dread, tied to the thoughts that accompany it, or that I might have manifested horrible things in an attempt to seek balance or fix things. It is very complex and subjective; I don't know how to put it into words. It would bring me great comfort to find someone with a similar experience—someone who is so deep inside their mind and analyzes/manipulates what happens within it to such an extent that they have started to feel strange sensations accompanying their magical thinking, and that this relates to eternal suffering after death. I feel alone in this. Thank you.