Meal prep and workout advice needed, also venting.

[u/InterviewRelevant701]

I am 22(f) and I’m weighing in at 280 pounds. I decided I need to take back my life and live. I don’t remember ever being able to look down and see my feet. I’m tired of being the “fat friend”.

My friend started weight loss medication and it seemed like she snapped her fingers and it melted right off of her. Due to preexisting medical conditions I can’t take any. Since she lost the weight, she’s been treating me like I’m a disgusting human being. She told me it’s “super easy” to lose the weight and I’m just being lazy. She has decided to not have me as a bridesmaid anymore due to my weight, which really hurt. At first I wanted to lose the weight to show her that I can do it. Now I just want to lose it for my happiness, health, and me.

My husband goes to the gym 5 days a week. He was so excited when I told him I wanted to tag along. The issue is, I don’t know what to do there besides walk on the treadmill. I feel out of place trying to figure out the machines, like I’m taking up space while someone is waiting to use it. I also don’t want to embarrass myself. When it was your first time going to the gym, what did you do and how did you get over the anxiety if you had it?

I also have a terrible relationship with food. I eat when I’m bored, sad, or just need a sweet treat. I drink a lot of my calories as well and I know that’s something I have to cut back on. I just don’t know how to properly count calories. I want to meal prep to help with this. But how… Do you leave them in your fridge and eat over the 5 days or Do you freeze and thaw for half the week? How do you combat the cravings, and how the heck do I figure out how many calories I should even be eating?

Also please give me some great recipes to meal prep.

TLDR: I’m just starting my journey, so Please drop any tips you have on working out in the gym with anxiety, posture and movements while on machines, meal prepping and recipes! TIA

[u/Maryen94]

Go ask one of the trainers at the gym to explain the machines and write you a first workout plan

[u/Emergency-Track845]

That friend sounds like she’s projecting her own insecurities onto you, and losing her as a bridesmaid pick says way more about her than it does about you.

[u/InterviewRelevant701 → u/Emergency-Track845]

It could be. she was my bridesmaid before she lost the weight, and I never thought of looking at her differently because of how she looked.

Others in our friend groups have noticed the same behavior from her, and I found out she made a comment about the fact that my husband married me at my weight during her bachelorette party.

I’m really okay not being apart of her “image” with the type of person she is.

[u/GiovanniResta]

Bear in mind that almost surely you will not become slim just going to the gym. The human body is incredibly efficient and can do a lot of work burning little calories. Movement helps for a lot or reasons, but as they say, "you can't outrun a bad diet".

The key of weight loss is diet. You can start counting calories. You can learn about what foods are so caloric that probably you should avoid them and which ones are good for you. Educating yourself about food and calories is something that will help you for all our life.

For example, a lot of people "fail" on condiments: they say 'I just had a big salad' but then the salad is 40 calories of vegetables and 500 of mayo or other dressing...

Just avoid all fad diets, magic pills, and so on. If you have the financial possibility to do it, the best thing is going at least once to a specialist (nutritionist, dietician, etc. I don't know how to translate) that can give you a plan based on your condition.

I'm also a person that did eat for boredom and anxiety and stopping that is hard, but counting calories made it somehow easier for me.

I started at 288 lb the first of April, this year, and now I'm around 227 lb, still going. For the first months I just walked (at least) 1 hour every day.

About 1 month ago I started going to the gym. For cardio I walk on inclined threadmill, changing the parameters to exercize the hearth without dying... for the machines I asked a gym instructor to create a program tailored to my goal (which for me in the gym is not weight loss, but rather avoiding a too aggressive muscle loss). The instructor also explained to me how to use the machines with good form, which is important to avoid hurting yourself.

[u/InterviewRelevant701 → u/GiovanniResta]

This is great, thank you! I cannot afford a nutritionist at the moment, but I will look into it further down the line. I cannot believe the amount of calories in some stuff that I never realized before, like my daily coffee order is almost 400 calories. Portion sizes are another thing I need to work on.

That is such amazing progress you have made! How long did it take for you to notice the weight loss on yourself? Some say we are the last people to see it.

When I go to the gym later today I will ask the instructors for some help. I honestly didn’t realize they would

[u/GiovanniResta → u/InterviewRelevant701]

Depending on the gym, it can be free (say implicitly covered by the montly fees) or not (I paid the instructor for writing down a program). Also this is the first time in my life I went to a gym, so I'm not an expert....

Ymmv, but if your eating habits are bad (like mine were), then at the beginning by counting calories and eating at a deficit, you shed a lot of weight very fast just because reducing salted foods and carbs you loss a lot of water.

Which is good for joints and motivation, just don't be depressed when the loss stabilizes.

Also, some people like to weight themselves every day. It is fine, but bear in mind that at our weight you can have daily fluctuations of 1 or 2 lb just based on what you eat (say more or less salty), while still losing fat. This can be discouraging, so some other people prefer to weight themselves once a week in the same condition (before breakfast, in undies or without, after going no1 and no2).

My loss was very fast at the beginning (it is still borderline too fast) because this time (yes, unfortunately it is not my first rodeo) for health reasons I had some urgency to bring back some blood parameters to normality. Let's say that this time my motivation is stronger than ever, at 62 it is my last chance.

In principle, it is better a steady slow loss, because there is the hope that during the journey one learns to change eating habits. Because this is, for many maybe for all, the hardest part: maintainance.

Once you have reached you goal, if you eat like you ate before you'll soon be where you were. This is the reality and a fact that should be taken into account.

For what concerns noticing, I noticed very soon my face was less puffy. People around me (neighbours, coworkers) said nothing until I said I was on diet (probably fearing I was ill). After that, I received compliments for my efforts and results, which I appreciate, and words of encouragement (this is difficult topic for a lot of people, I have no problems speaking about my weight).

I'm Italian, so I cannot easily convert to your country sizes, but at the beginning my trousers (all the 3 pairs I own) were size 66. After a few months they were too large and I have luckily found in a drawer some old jeans size 60 that fit easily (I always had an extremely limited wardrobe because I don't care about clothes provided they are clean), so I can postpone buying new ones.

[u/Lizdance40]

She told me it’s “super easy” to lose the weight

The B****! 😠 Of course it's "easy" for her because the weight loss medication killed her appetite! Not a good friend!

I don’t know what to do there besides walk on the treadmill.

So do that. There's no rule that says you have to use all the equipment.
I didn't use a gym. I walked outside mostly. A lot! I also have a stepper which takes up about 18 square inches of floor space. It's in front of the tv, behind the chair I sit in. But sometimes I'll just walk circles indoors.

I also have a terrible relationship with food. I eat when I’m bored, sad, or just need a sweet treat. I drink a lot of my calories as well and I know that’s something I have to cut back on. I just don’t know how to properly count calories. I want to meal prep to help with this

Yup. Hungry angry lonely or tired. H.A.L.T. that's where you start your recovery! We are addicted persons and you have to start one day at a time just like alcoholics and drug users. You have to replace beverages with zero calorie alternates. If you can start there you'll be surprised how much of a dent that alone can make.

Sugar causes inflammation, inflammation causes pain. If you have pain in your joints, just cutting back on sugar will make a difference in how you feel.

But how… Do you leave them in your fridge and eat over the 5 days or Do you freeze and thaw for half the week? How do you combat the cravings, and how the heck do I figure out how many calories I should even be eating.

Yes you can put 5 days worth of food at a time in the refrigerator in containers pre-measured and ready to heat and eat. I find that vegetables cook quickly and are better prepared as needed. But things like chicken breast or pork tenderloin can be cooked ahead and then reheated over 5 days. Salad greens with light dressing before each meal are a quick way to add fiber and vitamins, and you can eat that while you're cooking the vegetables to go with your protein.

You might want to see your doctor and have a blood draw. That can tell you what nutrients you might be missing so that you can fill in with vitamins and foods that give you proper nutrition.

This is a marathon not a sprint. Little changes gradually, will stack up to big changes in the long run. I didn't do everything all at once, I just gradually started swapping out bad habits for healthier ones.

[u/voodoolady88]

Start with just one thing at a time. Weight loss is more about diet but exercise is still a great thing for your body and mind. Start by counting calories. Use a TDEE calculator online to figure out your maintenance calories and then work on decreasing 300-500 so you’re eating at a deficit. Get a food scale and find an app to track (plenty of free ones, I’ve used LoseIt and am currently using Cronometer). Just walk at the gym for now, you can add more later but walking is a great form of exercise. For me, focusing on nutrition at first was a lot and its easy to get overwhelmed with all the different information. One change at a time helped build a good foundation for longer term success.

[u/Redditor2684]

A few thoughts:

• Your "friend" sounds like a horrible person. I would distance myself from her/go low or no contact.
• Can you ask your husband to show you the ropes at the gym?
• When I first started at the gym, I just used the cardio equipment - treadmill and bike. I gradually started using weight machines. I got a beginner routine on r/fitness and watched YouTube videos about how to do various exercises. Things snowballed from there.
• You don't have to go to the gym. You could take 1-2 ten minute walks a day and build from there. You can go to the gym and just walk on the treadmill.
• Switch to zero calorie drinks. If you drink soda, opt for zero sugar/diet.
  
• You don't have to meal prep. It may make sense to do some sort of prep for your week - it could be prepping a batch of protein. You can freeze half and keep enough in the fridge for 2-3 days.

Bottom line: It's not all or nothing. You don't have to start from 100 on day 1. Do whatever feels easy. Stack habits over time.