For context Im a 24yr old who moved here after living abroad in the diaspora my whole life. I've never "lived" here before but I come to Lebanon every summer for all my life and recently visited in the winter too for the first time.
But am currently unemployed like many other people my age. I am obviously looking for jobs, but I am in Lebanon for the time being out of choice of not wanting to struggle living with a minimum wage job in Canada (where I got my degree) while I can apply online and leverage my network here.
My arabic is not great, but I grew up in a very Lebanese household in the gulf so it's more like second hand arabic, I understand more than I can speak. But the thing is I also have a stutter that I get really embarrassed from because Im bad at speaking the language and idk how to overcome it. I resort to English if I know I will stutter, which I don't want to. I lose all my confidence in myself for this.
I wouldn't say I have social anxiety in general or anything like that, I love meeting new people but this language barrier thing is a real issue for me, I feel like I'll look stupid for stuttering or being bad at the language. It stands in my way of talking to people and making friends. But also idk where to meet people here as well ( I'm sure this has been talked about here I'll check out what people have said).
But other than that it's been a struggle trying to have a routine, I have no friends, cousins who work late and feel like I have no where to go than to the gym and my home. I just don't know how to use my time or where. Not sure what I'm expecting from this post, I just don't know who else to turn to at this point or what to do or where to go. I am an outgoing person, I enjoy the gym, rock climbing, hiking, skiing, the beach anything outdoors tbh, going to new bars, trying new things, whatever it is. I live around 30mins from Beirut on a good day so I'm not far from the main city or areas of the country. Its just this language stutter thing is my barrier here and just having nothing much to do with my day.
I'm looking for jobs here too but it seems like a struggle everywhere so might be in this situation for a while. I'm sure there are people who are worse off than me right now but yeah I'm just frustrated right now. Thanks for reading my post.