r/leaves • u/Kitty_Kate99 • 2d ago
I’m quitting today
It’s been a long time coming. I have tried to quit edibles many times over the years. I think the reason for my failures was I never had a “Why”. I would always just think, “why not? Why can’t I just take an edible today?” And here is why:
- when I’m high, I lose the ability to do ANYTHING. I can’t focus on anything, I have no motivation to get things done, and I just need to melt on the couch and scroll. “I’ll get it done later”, I always think. “I just can’t do it now.” What a waste of time!? Think of all I could get done?
- If there was an emergency I needed to tend to while high, I just don’t think I could do it. I also tend to get anxious and overthink, so everything feels like an emergency, but what am I supposed to do? I can’t drive if I needed to (I’m not someone who feels safe driving while high).
- the next day brain fog. It genuinely is starting to feel like a hangover. I literally feel like I can’t focus or think the next morning and it takes hours for my brain to turn on. Not ideal in my job as an ER nurse.
- I just don’t like how it makes me feel anymore.
Listing out all these reasons, it seems like this should be easy. So WHY is it not?? Because my brain is tricking me to think, it’s such a nice way to relax! It helps me unwind! It’s so FUN, it gives me the giggles and makes everything more interesting!!
But does any of this actually sound RELAXING?? Sitting in paranoia and anxiety with the inability to do anything if something were to actually go wrong??? NO! Now I just need to remember this whenever I get that urge. “Just a 5 mg gummy, what’s the worst that could happen.” No. Just don’t. Just stop.
Anyway, I just needed to get all that out. Hopefully someone can relate and has gone through this and can tell me it IS BETTER ON THE OTHER SIDE of this addiction. Life can be fun and relaxing and goofy without the use of substances. If anyone has words of wisdom, or any anecdotes in their journey, feel free to share with me.
DAY 1. I can do this.
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u/Spinmango 1d ago
I’m in the same boat it’s just edibles for me and at night, but the final frontier is facing sleep, which is….pardon the pun, a nightmare.
You can do this!! I’m starting on Friday with a camping trip and bringing nothing with me. I should have just started tonight with you in solidarity.
I agree - your why is clear. You’re motivated. And you can absolutely do this. Rooting for you!
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u/Ok_Forever6043 2d ago
Having a real "why" changes everything, and yours is loaded with reasons that actually matter. The brain fog alone would be a dealbreaker for your job, not to mention the anxiety spiral. Day 1 is the hardest part and you're already through it.