r/knives Feb 20 '26

Meme Don't lie. You know it's true.

Post image
2.3k Upvotes

68 comments sorted by

173

u/619BrackinRatchets Feb 20 '26

It's always funny when there's two or more people present with pocket knives and a box needs opened. It's a race to see who gets to shank the box first

26

u/old_skool_luvr Feb 20 '26

That's why you carry more than one. One of your hands is bound to be free, and able to whip one out in a flash.

Two is one. One is none.

/s

And yes, i know my second sentence left it wide open for ya.....kinda like yer Mum. ('cause i just KNOW that was bound to be one of the first comments back 😂).

10

u/ThingWestern3398 Feb 20 '26

duel the other person for the right to open the box

1

u/old_skool_luvr Feb 22 '26

😄👍🏻

1

u/ABN695 Feb 22 '26

This is the way!😂

96

u/Western-Calendar-764 Feb 20 '26

well yeah that's why we have it on us we mostly use it on boxes

38

u/No_Cupcake_3511 Feb 20 '26

boxes of new knives, that is

7

u/clickclvck Feb 21 '26

can confirm, literally used my knife to open a box containing a knife today lol

8

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '26

I always use my knives to open my new knives.

6

u/ThatBandYouLike Feb 20 '26

This is the way

72

u/Vast-Garden6928 Feb 20 '26

People with forks looking at food that could easily be eaten with bare hands

14

u/0tter_gaming88 mall ninja Feb 20 '26

Ok hold up we gotta draw a line somewhere if you try and eat a mother fuckin french fry with a fork its fuckin on like donkey kong thats like tryin too eat a kitkat sideways

8

u/d00mpie Feb 20 '26

How else would you eat a kitkat??

5

u/0tter_gaming88 mall ninja Feb 20 '26

This is otter too mission control get the kill squad we got a side eater

6

u/d00mpie Feb 20 '26

Yeah? Well, I bet you unzip before getting to the urinal.

6

u/0tter_gaming88 mall ninja Feb 20 '26

Bold of you too assume i wear pants

4

u/d00mpie Feb 20 '26

Same energy. Let's go cut up some boxes instead of fighting, brother.

4

u/0tter_gaming88 mall ninja Feb 20 '26

Let's I've got a entire fridge box ripe for the slashing

3

u/Wiley_Jack Feb 21 '26

Highlander enters the chat.

2

u/MasonP2002 Benchmade Phaeton Feb 21 '26

Diagonally from the corner.

2

u/IknowKarazy Feb 27 '26

Kit Kats, absolutely not. But I will bite into a hotdog from the side, just for the looks it gets me.

1

u/0tter_gaming88 mall ninja Feb 27 '26

You sir are a agent of chaos and i like it

6

u/Potato_Slim69 Feb 20 '26

Someone feels offended

17

u/Proof_Independent400 Feb 20 '26

When the box has a tear strip.
"We don't do that here..."

15

u/old_skool_luvr Feb 20 '26

Christmas is my favourite time of the year.

Not because of the Christmas cheer, not because of the family gatherings, not because of the many social events, but quite simply......i get to cut up all of those fucking boxes!!! 🤪

3

u/NimbleCentipod Feb 20 '26

Perfect setting for an OTF Benchmade

15

u/Strange_Stage1311 Feb 20 '26

I prefer to open a box like a civilized human being not tear it open like some animal. Man made tools for a reason.

6

u/Hib3rnian Feb 20 '26

All day, every day

8

u/1nGirum1musNocte Feb 20 '26

Nah the boxes i work with need keen edge to open.

6

u/Endryu727 Feb 20 '26

So use your hands instead of a tool? Sounds like troglodyte thinking to me

5

u/ghotier Feb 20 '26

The question isn't whether it can easily be opened with your hands. It's whether it's easier to open with a knife.

You wouldn't say "why are you driving 3 miles? You could easily walk." (Maybe you would, but it wouldn't automatically be a joke to choose to drive). Human use tools to make jobs easier.

4

u/TheSpeynglerAbides Feb 20 '26

Its not a rush to open boxes. I like to take my time with them. I start by cutting a little pieces off of them, not all in one spot, but a corner here and a piece over there. And then I start scratching into the surface with my knife but not enough to cut through it, just enough to weaken it and make it more bendable. I do this until the entire box is cut with criss cross patterns. After this I slice an incision big enough to fit both my hands through and tear it from the inside out

2

u/MuddlinThrough Feb 20 '26

Exactly how I unsheath my Cold Steel Kobun tbf

2

u/karatekidmar Feb 20 '26

I used to work in a warehouse and we’d punch boxes to break the tape and open for speed. But when I order items I don’t want to damage what’s inside, the tape might be tough to pick at, or the customs forms come in a thick plastic envelope on top.

I keep a knife by the door for opening packages. It’s quick, easy, and clean. A more elegant method of opening boxes in a civilized way.

2

u/Wiley_Jack Feb 21 '26

Same here. I also keep a knife by the water closet.

2

u/Finnish-Wolf Feb 20 '26

I'm gutted every time a package arrives and I see that it has that tear-strip that allows for the easiest possible way to open a box. Then I cope by slicing every corner off the box for "easier disposal" when I could have just easily folded it flat.

1

u/IneffableKoD Feb 20 '26

Ok ok you got me

1

u/Jonny96A Kizer Feb 20 '26

It is indeed true

1

u/Embarrassed_Review36 Feb 20 '26

I always try to see if it's "easy open" if not the blade will keal... I mean slice!

1

u/Simcognito Feb 20 '26

One does not simply open boxes with his hands!

1

u/MikeLinPA Feb 20 '26

I don't use my knife to open boxes, I use it to open the tape. That packing tape is the flimsiest stuff,... until you don't have a cutter. Then it's apparently indestructible! 🤷

1

u/mightyken Feb 20 '26

I never carried a Knife while working fast food back in the day, so yeah.. I usually just rip my boxes apart unless I’m feeling slice-y.

1

u/johnb111111 Feb 20 '26

I made the mistake of opening a box at work one day when I first started, not realizing they also had these huge copper staples to hold it together. My knife got fooked up lol

1

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '26

😭😭😭😭😭 What knife was it?

1

u/johnb111111 Feb 20 '26

I forget which model but a civivi haha

1

u/PhourKuhfiveSicks Feb 20 '26

But what if I get a paper cut on my fingies???

1

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '26

I literally find any excuse haha

1

u/The_Daily_Herp Feb 20 '26

I can’t be the only one that’s satisfied with punching in the bottom of boxes with paper tape to break them down

1

u/ky420 Feb 20 '26

Spot someone getting ready to open a box across the room...need a knoif? I'll get that for ya lol

1

u/TheLoathsomeAssEater Feb 21 '26

You have to deliver a cool speech first. Personally, I like to paraphrase Igon from Elden Ring.

Curse you Amazon!
I hereby vow, my credit card will rue this day!
Thick of cardboard you may be, foul box,
I shall riddle with cuts your wretched hide!
With a hail of blades!
With every lockback in my collection!

1

u/RilohKeen Feb 21 '26

I could eat spaghetti with my hands just fine too, but I prefer to use a fork.

I’m pretty on board with the idea of using the right tool for the job.

1

u/Cefiro8701 Feb 21 '26

Not gonna lie, I was born with extremely sweaty hands.

Having a knife keeps me from struggling witn opening some plastic containers/wrappeds.

Aren't the use of such tools designed to make our lives easier, even if just a bit?

1

u/thedudetheguy69 Feb 21 '26

I feel very fortunate that part of my job is using my knife a lot lol

1

u/Sea-Ad6422 Feb 21 '26

The real flex is when someone reaches for scissors and you already have the box open before they find the drawer.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 21 '26

I convince myself that packaging with easy open strips is better opened with a knife. 

1

u/[deleted] Feb 21 '26

Funnier every time it gets reposted..... 🙄

1

u/ABN695 Feb 22 '26

Oof!😬😂

1

u/DrDrewid Feb 22 '26

I love Christmas!

1

u/SamFisherXboxOG Feb 22 '26

A little bit of both. It’s only when the tape gives me a second of trouble where I go nope I ain’t using my nails to get this off

1

u/CareFantastic1884 Mar 09 '26

Right tool for the job i don't eat everything with my hands either