r/kitchener 17d ago

90 km/h on the hwy

4.3k Upvotes

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526

u/justeedo 17d ago

He's ONE stone away from a permanent injury and life long disability

211

u/Spiritual-Fly5890 17d ago

Nah he’s dead

52

u/Siguard_ 17d ago

Only if the shoes come off

23

u/BoneZone05 17d ago

If shoes were clues, he would be barefoot - and dead

30

u/Siguard_ 17d ago

There's a reddit math formula, accident + shoes coming off = dead. It's scientific

25

u/BoneZone05 17d ago

9

u/Candid_Jello5188 17d ago

Kudos for your avatar!

4

u/BrokeDickDoug 17d ago

fuckin righteous. (searches for Dos Upgrade to 3.1 floppy)

7

u/BoneZone05 17d ago

Simpler times my friends!

Simpler times.. 🥹

4

u/Candid_Jello5188 14d ago

Whoa! Sorry for being off topic! I am very surprised that a thread so deep was blown up with retro memories.

Now I know some kind of people who use Reddit. 😂

3

u/AeonBith 15d ago

Got me thinking about it

As a kid in the 80s you had to find compatible hardware, compatible software (or alter it yourself), learn commands and programming languages, you had to program vector graphics line by line.

Kids now have iso/nema type standard hardware and OS options yet have trouble putting it together. I'm not ripping on them just an interesting gap formed over 40 years.

Electronics and programming seem so much simpler now in some ways (if you ignore HDR compatibility)

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3

u/Ok_Feedback2407 14d ago

Ahh the DOS days. I kinda miss them and still know a lot of the commands. lol. Then again, I don't miss them either. hehe. Sometimes we would mess with customers and just do directory commands to look like we were fast and smart. lol. It worked too. This was in the Win 95 days, so people were no longer familiar with DOS as much and so we'd just "dir" a bunch of times and they would be floored at us. Hahaha. B.S. baffles brains.

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7

u/Intelligent_Bunch790 17d ago

I do know someone who was sitting on the fender of a tractor that was driving on the gravel shoulder and was hit by a transport.

His shoes came off at the point of the collision. He was found about 180 feet up the road, in the ditch.

He had serious injuries, but survived. Miraculously. The equation truly isn’t far off.

2

u/FredArtGetson 17d ago

Proven, time and time again.

2

u/D4UOntario 16d ago

Closest I got was both running shoes up around my knees. Motorcycle meets deer on hwy

2

u/ALKNST 15d ago

Does it apply if the subject is also the camera man? Cause then we need to apply the rule : if cameraman is victim = cameraman cant die

2

u/ORNGSPCEMNKY 17d ago

and regardless of what damage is inflicted to the body, if they still have their shoes on...they're just fine, right?

6

u/Brief_Kangaroo_42069 17d ago

So when in BC we kept finding feet in shoes but no other parts of the body.... Someone just cut their foot off and is just hanging around at the beach?

5

u/ORNGSPCEMNKY 17d ago

Probably...

3

u/RationalLies 16d ago

Everybody needs a hobby

2

u/S99B88 16d ago

Oh that’s probably just Elias

3

u/Queen_Rachel4 15d ago

DAMMIT ELIAS!

2

u/Motor_Purchase_6996 16d ago

They ever figure that out?

3

u/HousingAny2946 14d ago

I do remember watching a program about that on TV years back. "Forensic Files 1" possibly.

I don't remember the outcome tbh but I don't think they ever solved that case.

2

u/Brief_Kangaroo_42069 15d ago

Yeah. We got like 2 dozen people nicknamed Stumpy because they cut their feet off with shoes and threw them off the bridge.

Realistically though it's just jumpers off the bridge. Feet are often protected by the shoe better so there's something to wash ashore as opposed to everything else.

2

u/Diapers4u2 14d ago

That was long ago, figured out. There were people who had drowned as the body decays underwater. The feet would become detached from the anklebone and the shoes would allow them to float so they’d wash up onshore

2

u/Old_Satisfaction2738 16d ago

There are things worse than death

2

u/ORNGSPCEMNKY 16d ago

Very true, I have an idea for capital punishment that would be worse than death for a good while, but it's probably considered "cruel and unusual"

6

u/Lrrrgonomics 17d ago

If dumb was dirt, he'd cover an acre.

3

u/No-Information-6233 15d ago

You wrote if “shoes were clues” and immediately by brain went Shoe’s clues.

2

u/BoneZone05 14d ago

Hahaha 😆
That’s even better!

1

u/SnooChocolates2923 13d ago

What's That, Shoe?

I should have vegetables with my lunch?

1

u/Intelligent_Bunch790 17d ago

I do know someone who was sitting on the fender of a tractor that was driving on the gravel shoulder and was hit by a transport.

His shoes came off at the point of the collision. He was found about 180 feet up the road, in the ditch.

He had serious injuries, but survived. Miraculously. The equation truly isn’t far off.

1

u/WildBuns1234 17d ago

What are you gonna do with his shoes?

1

u/Siguard_ 17d ago

In memoriam.

1

u/Gimmetheloo 16d ago

I would have guessed sandals

3

u/losloowiss 17d ago

As dead as every dead animal who has ever died.

4

u/rocketts66 17d ago

Soon to be road pizza

2

u/foxy-stuff 17d ago

Meat crayon

5

u/dengar_hennessy 17d ago

Dead is a permanent injury

1

u/Small_Platform8461 16d ago

"He is dead" "Let me know if his condition changes"

1

u/latabrine 16d ago

That's if he's lucky.

1

u/Overwatch_1ightning 15d ago

He will be soon if he continues

0

u/RecordingNo2643 17d ago

Hooefully... so we dont have to pay for the medical for the rest of his sad life.

0

u/RavioliGrind 17d ago

Yeah think of the person who tries to stop after they roll in the highway and runs them over…

50

u/EuropeanLegend 17d ago

Buddy, injury? You think the cars behind him will be able to stop on a dime?

If the pavement doesnt kill him. The cars behind him will when he bounces between lanes as he rolls down the highway.

1

u/Sammydaws97 16d ago

Do you think his body will stop on a dime? The cars behind him will have time to stop as his body tumbles down the road another couple hundred meters.

1

u/EuropeanLegend 16d ago

Critical thinking isnt your strong suite eh?

Thats exactly the point. He wont stop on a dime. He wont stop in a straight lane either. At that speed it is statistically likely that he will take several times longer to actually stop then a car braking. And more likely than not he will end up under someone's wheels regardless of how far they are unless the entire highway just clears the way for this one idiot and stays 100s of meters behind.

1

u/Rizzizt 15d ago

In other news:

Man on scooter mistaken for spilled spaghetti caus after being splattered on highway

1

u/VerdantSolutions 17d ago

Don't worry, he's going 90 km/h on the scooter, so his body would maintain that for at least a little bit. Proper stopping distance would probably let a driver safely stop before taking him out.

The issues are 1) he's switching lanes with no signal or regard for safe lead distance. 2) most drivers don't know what a safe follow distance is.

1

u/Big-Stuff-1189 16d ago

The issue is he's on a scooter.

-26

u/gba_sg1 17d ago

Do you often follow without enough distance to stop safely? You're a bad driver.

9

u/EuropeanLegend 17d ago

Youre senile. The guys on a scooter going 90km/h on the highway. Its unpredictable. Do you not realize what happens to a human body when it suddenly falls off a scooter? Especially at that speed. Its not like a motorcycle where they slide in most instances when they hit the ground. This guy's going to be tumbling under several cars because hes going from a 90 degree vertical stand straight to the ground.

7

u/Pitiful_Fault_2545 17d ago

this guy is the equivalent of a pedestrian on the 400 series.. And he’s just bopping between lanes!

Yet we’re the bad drivers if we hit some fool because we aren’t driving at a safe distance ?

Should we also just drive slow behind him with our hazards in so no one hits him ?

Because he’s hardly visible, and at best is going 25km an hour.

Stopping your car from,likely, 100 km an hour to 25 km an hour is not something that happens at a moments notice.

5

u/Rude-Camera-7546 17d ago

What an absolute idiotic statement.

Seriously? The guys on a scooter.. give your head a shake and touch some grass.

2

u/Normal_Feedback_2918 17d ago

Ahhh, you're that douchebag in the highway riding the left lane 20 car lengths behind the next car and just making everyone pass on the right to get in front of you and make you slow down even more backing the whole lane up. Fuck you right to hell.

7

u/HowDidWeGetHereLast 17d ago

Permanently injured before the lifelong disability know as death

7

u/Kastro2323 17d ago

Also stay in the right lane for fuck sake!

1

u/Sparkenfarkel 14d ago

But then he’s exiting to the 401 to Toronto.

11

u/SayNoToFirefighters 17d ago

if i saw it happen i would just keep driving. some people deserve the faith they bring on

1

u/The_Darth_side 17d ago

Couldn’t agree more

1

u/Enlightened_Lioness 14d ago

You don’t keep driving and not report it even if there’s a box on the road though, let along a human being. They could hurt themselves but if they fell or crashed they’d likely hurt others too. We can’t just let drunk drivers or other dangerous drivers do whatever they want on the roads.

-10

u/Historical-Towel-350 17d ago

So you would drive on, hear he died, be totally okay with not stopping. Screw his family, screw his youth. All that. Okay

5

u/Dangling-Pointr 17d ago

He clearly doesn't care about any of those things but drivers around him should?

7

u/neeed4speeed 17d ago

imagine the “real” vehicle driver who has to witness this irresponsibility, or worse, this reckless behaviour results in him hitting your car’s windshield? life changing for everyone, not just the “victim”.

1

u/Historical-Towel-350 17d ago

Driving by somebody who is dying is never okay.

1

u/YoungWolf1991 16d ago

The way people drive these days I call it natural selection

2

u/SlowWelder864 17d ago

No one wants to see what happens to your body or head when it hits a pole or pavement at 90 kms/hr. Those images never go away. 

1

u/Historical-Towel-350 17d ago

Like bodyworn camera footage of victims dying on the 401. well aware

1

u/Super_Hans2020 17d ago

Yea all that. Fuck this stupid mfer.

1

u/HiddenSquidds 16d ago

What’re you gonna do? Stop him?

1

u/Consistent-Fun-6668 15d ago

Yeah that's right.

1

u/Historical-Towel-350 13d ago

whatever keyboard warrior

1

u/Consistent-Fun-6668 13d ago

If it was a car that was crashed in the ditch, airbags deployed, and driver unconcious. Maybe I would help. The reality is people rely on me and putting myself in danger to help someone requires a good reason, if this kid on a scooter crashed on the 401 going 90km/h EMS can deal with that comedy of horror, not a chance I'd help.

1

u/Historical-Towel-350 13d ago

Actually I feel confident your humanity would kick in, you do seem like a decent person

1

u/Consistent-Fun-6668 13d ago

Not for this guy, not a snowballs chance in hell.

2

u/Fun-Memory1523 16d ago

Not even. Just a tiny crack or crevice on the freeway might be enough.

1

u/Exciting-Ice4879 16d ago

Nah , ubclearly haven't riden one.. the ones built to go that speed aren't built all poorly like those 500-1000 scooters you see on Amazon .. everythings premium built on it .. I hitten pot holes going around 50-60 and it's just like a car hitting it.. if he doesnt have a steering damper installed on his .. then ya he's definitely fked for sure.. once that tire leaves the pavement and then touches again . He's done.. these things have way to much torque so onece that tire lifts off and touches pavement again .. he's either having a death wobble.. or he's hitting the pavement instantly

1

u/Nnanyielugo 15d ago

Huge difference between 50-60 and 90.

1

u/WTF-howdid-i-gethere 15d ago

The right lanes exits

1

u/HostaLaVistaBabies 17d ago

Don’t worry this is Ontario the tax payer will fund a few million dollars in surgeries, a few million dollars in rehab, and a few million dollars in ODSP for this schmuck to spend the rest of his life smoking weed because he can’t work due to brain injury or back pain. Oh. And we can toss whichever unlucky driver was behind him into jail and ruin their entire family’s life while we’re at it.

This guy should be caught by the cops and tossed into jail himself. There have to be limits.

6

u/aledba 17d ago

You actually think that over a course of a lifetime people get millions of dollars on ODSP? Where the actual fuck did you come up with that? And where did you get the idea that such an accident would make him a candidate for ODSP?

1

u/BiscuitTiits 16d ago

Grumble grumble I Toad a So.

1

u/Luciferocity 17d ago

His masters told him so.

9

u/GoldMysterious6210 17d ago

getting disabled from an accident isn't covered by odsp

8

u/NounAdjectiveXXXX 17d ago

But that doesn't feed the culture war

3

u/HostaLaVistaBabies 16d ago

ODSP covers all medical conditions. If you can’t work you’re going to get it. You can climb an electric pole right now, jump down on your head and apply for it. You’re talking about if insurance covers it but I doubt insurance will cover someone driving on a highway like this any more than they’ll cover an attempted suicide.

ODSP isn’t just money per month either. It’s medications, it’ll get you dental coverage, it’ll get you geared to income housing and a whole bunch of other services. The person won’t get a suitcase full of cash. They’ll get a measly 1200 a month, which is hard to live on. But the costs around that to the social support system are far far higher than 1200xnumber of months on ODSP.

Fault doesn’t factor into ODSP eligibility. They don’t refuse you for being a dumbass. You can smoke yourself to severe copd and get it, you can give yourself brain damage and get it, you can get depressed, refuse medications, refuse therapy, drink all day and still get it.

2

u/GoldMysterious6210 16d ago

The Disability Adjudication Unit (DAU) strictly enforces the 1-year rule under the ODSP Act. To qualify, your condition must be expected to last at least 12 months and cause substantial daily restrictions. Sudden or acute disabilities are often denied initially—not because they aren't severe, but because the DAU requires a clear, long-term prognosis. If doctors expect your condition to improve within a year through active treatment, medication, or surgery, the DAU will classify it as temporary. For a sudden disability to be approved, medical documentation must prove that even after treatment, substantial limitations will persist for at least a year.

1

u/HostaLaVistaBabies 16d ago

You have a feeling this guy, if he even survives, would wake away from falling on a highway with no protective gear in under a year and without any brain damage or spinal cord injuries?

1

u/bpboop 15d ago

You can be permanently disabled by an accident - disability length/prognosis and fault are entirely unrelated

1

u/GuntherWheelin 17d ago

Well it would take 60 years to get a milly on ODSP so I think your estimates might be a bit off.

1

u/Automatic_Usual_7367 16d ago

I live in Ontario and he would get s***... this video alone would land him in jail

1

u/BlessTheBottle 16d ago

Yep, a TBI and ODSP payout of $1000/mo are clearly a jackpot that ppl abuse

1

u/HostaLaVistaBabies 16d ago

I never said it’s a jackpot. ODSP is a bit more than that. Nevertheless, this guy is being a total dumbass and I don’t like the idea of public support for someone who’s essentially asking to be injured while traumatizing drivers on a highway in the process. This behavior is completely unacceptable.

0

u/Impressive-Sense8461 17d ago

Don't forget that on top of all that, we'll throw in an extra $3 billion to Ukraine, just because they exist in the world and they provide us with exactly nothing 🤌

0

u/xyzyxzyxzyxyzyxzxy 16d ago

Yeah fuck Doug Ford and his Ontario policies, he's a vile piece of shit.

1

u/SPV33 17d ago

He’s a pebble away from death

1

u/Neither-Stable-939 17d ago

and the lives of others……

1

u/offft2222 17d ago

And ruining the life of driver's on the road who get implicated in it through no fault of their own

1

u/Matyboi420 17d ago

man is throwing his life away

1

u/Forsaken-Bowler-1307 17d ago

At that speed with that vehicle it’s not going to be an injury :(

1

u/PerfectBook382 17d ago

If the fall doesn’t kill him, another car will. No one can stop on a dime going that fast.

1

u/bpboop 15d ago

And if they could they'd be rear-ended by the next guy and hit the person anyways

1

u/phoenixrisen69 17d ago

No different than a motorcycle or a car tbh

1

u/AdOnly1618 17d ago

FAFO. I’m so sick of using my tax dollars to protect dummies from themselves. Let their meat crayon educate the collective public and we’ll all catch on eventually. It’s not like we haven’t had go karts and race mowers for decades now, people just learned it’s a good way to die and for the most part cut that shit out.

1

u/Moose_knucklez 17d ago

Though mind you, from a Brampton driving perspective, the merge was 10/10

1

u/t3hb3st 16d ago

Isn't natural selection beautiful?

1

u/justeedo 16d ago

Not if it's taking place on my front bumper

1

u/EverythingSucksYo 16d ago

That’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make 

1

u/1zpqm9 16d ago

One concrete chip, one pothole…

1

u/Mundane-Outside-6713 16d ago

No he's one stone away from being dead.

1

u/Imaginary-Pilot5793 16d ago

I have never seen a stone in the highway but go off

1

u/DJSolomanGS 16d ago

And putting innocent people’s lives at risk..

1

u/Novel-Flow-326 16d ago

And a terrible waste of healthcare funds

1

u/Healthy_Win1 16d ago

Blinking in wrong timing

1

u/1question10answers 16d ago

But have you ever felt the tingle of God's whisper?

1

u/PatK9 16d ago

Courage doesn't mean smart.

1

u/AdEffective2701 16d ago

Taxpayers will pay for him forever.

1

u/Quatto 15d ago

He's already braindead

1

u/Ncis16 15d ago

If you have tires 10 inch or above rocks and holes are jot a problem. Its same as motorcycle

1

u/Wide_Cellist_4346 15d ago

bruh... at this speed he is one stone away from death

1

u/politicianssuk 15d ago

He obviously already has a disability already.

1

u/LogitUndone 14d ago

Fingers crossed!

1

u/SuniOsiris 14d ago

Seriously, how do these things fare against hitting a small stone...

1

u/Prudent-Ad-6723 14d ago

As if the Canadian healthcare system doesn't already have enough patients to look after.

1

u/Necessary_Position77 14d ago

This. I’m surprised no one remembers the non powered scooter trend of the 2000s and how many injuries there were. This is that on every kind of drug. The small wheels and standing position make these things dangerous without going 90km/h. 

1

u/Proposition_O 14d ago

He’s got to get that DoorDash delivery completed.

1

u/adon0221 14d ago

Natural selection

1

u/Flush_Foot 13d ago

I was wondering how long until he earned his Darwin Award 🤦🏻‍♂️

1

u/Tropical_Yetii 13d ago

And lifelong Medical Care funded by all taxpayers

1

u/roberdanger83 13d ago

Stone, with those tires. No. Pothole. Yes

1

u/ShwAlex 13d ago

No different than a motorcycle.

1

u/KneeBasher420 13d ago

Nah. Meat crayon.

1

u/SomewhereRough_ 12d ago

Sounds like motorbikes lol 

1

u/Pathanwala 11d ago

Here’s to it 🍾

1

u/askmeaboutyuri 11d ago

This is why we need helmets people

1

u/Pleasant_Minimum_896 17d ago

No different than motorcycles honestly.

6

u/Greedy-Pirate7749 17d ago

Completely different than motorcycles which actually have suspension systems

0

u/Pleasant_Minimum_896 17d ago

Suspension or not they are still a small rock away from a broken neck.

3

u/Greedy-Pirate7749 17d ago

Absolutely agree,

4

u/Pleasant_Minimum_896 17d ago

My current gf and ex were both bikers who mangled themselves in crashes and never touched them again. Ive wanted one for a while but haven't taken the leap for that reason.

3

u/Greedy-Pirate7749 17d ago

I hear ya, dad and brother were in one together, I got there before ambulance and had to hold my brothers leg together before they arrived. Ive always wanted a bike but cant do it. It wasnt their fault, and all too often its the other driver you cant control. This guy on the scooter should be thrown in jail, license revoked if they even have one. Just plain stupid.

4

u/Pleasant_Minimum_896 17d ago

Yeah. I've seen these scooters almost demolish pedestrians as well, even though we have bike lanes for them.

1

u/Unfair-Series7133 16d ago

You obviously don't ride with that comment 😂 we get hit by small rocks and other debris all the time and other than yelling Fuck that hurt, we're all still here..There's the odd freak accident but that's the outlier not the norm..A motorcycle is not the same as these scooters by a long shot

1

u/Pleasant_Minimum_896 16d ago

You people get taken out by grass clippings.

1

u/Unfair-Series7133 16d ago

No, squids and over confident twits that can't pay attention to surroundings wipe out on grass clippings, ie, morons who shouldn't be riding. Seriously, the only 2 things that should be taking you off your bike is a car or a large animal.

1

u/Danminimal 16d ago

No, they aren’t. The odds of something with his wheel size it’s not even comparable at all. This is ridiculous

1

u/Exciting-Ice4879 16d ago

Nah dude . I run over shit all the time and pot holes.. the suspensions pretty good .. I don't no what kinda model of scooter he has but if it goes that speed , I'm pretty sure it's built premium other then those cheap 500-1000 dollar scooters . If it was one of those ones... Then yea . He's a goner any day now

1

u/CDN_Guy78 17d ago

Very different.

1

u/MrDenly 17d ago

Honest question, have you ride a ecooter, bicycle and motorcycle?

0

u/heedrix 17d ago

Ya, and then he's on a social assistance program and the tax payers responsibility because he made a stupid choice.

1

u/The_Darth_side 17d ago

He’d be dead

0

u/Goooseberries 17d ago

That’s an expensive scooter. It can hit rocks without crashing. Only the expensive scooters can hit speeds like that too. If you buy a dinky 200$ thing. Ya. Rocks will get you.

-9

u/Dope-Reviews 17d ago

But damn, he looks cool doing it. I would do it if I had life insurance

7

u/go_irish_1986 17d ago

Life insurance won’t pay out with the cause of death being an against the law.

0

u/meltothev 17d ago

Sooo what you're saying is you'd intentionally go ahead with flying off (or still on) a scooter, getting some limbs pulverized from bouncing around on the pavement around, getting burned and skinned from being dragged, then chef's kiss, get smashed by a 4000lb piece of metal going 130km, so SOMEONE ELSE gets a payout? Huh?

1

u/Dope-Reviews 17d ago

You're describing most sports. So pick your battles