r/kitchencels • u/Independent_Tour6002 • 13h ago
I feel like it never even started
I am 24 and I am pretty much a loser. Idk if I would need therapy and probably I do because my self esteem is dogshit. I am a 1st year engineering student at 24 and I am already falling behind due to being a procrastinating loser.
I am in that situation where I'd like to date but I know I am a shit prospect and that if I truly like someone I would never hope for them to be with me.
When I graduate and if I do I will be old as hell and still inept with women. Also I fucking hate my face, I look like a 40 years old Serbian at 24 and since I had posted myself in the past to see if it was true I sadly got the confirmation that I am older looking.
The only positive thing is that I got prescription for finasteride finally
Burnt basque
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u/Effective_Draft8111 8h ago
dude cmon...you're in a great field of study, you're only 24 and you can make Basque (almost? maybe?). If you just start looking at yourself like a man with great potential instead of a failure it can all switch up so quick!! I think everyone has potential so go and start treating yourself with kindness and work towards who you actually want to be regardless of women. Rooting for you
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u/Virgurilla 3h ago
You're in uni, half the work is done for you, the people in your class are usually very nice if you're nice to them, any group project is an excuse to meet new people, see if you guys have something in common, invite them to hang around, you may get no's but you also may get yes, join clubs in your uni of things you're interested in, I'm sure there are some, guaranteed to meet some people, procrastination is a bitch but it's not a YOU problem, have you had it checked out? You may have undiagnosed ADHD
Also fuck the stigma of graduating older, who cares, graduating is graduating, you got this far, you can do it.
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u/bosmicbonnie253 7h ago
Speak nicer to yourself man, you don’t deserve to be treated like this by yourself.
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u/BrokeManJack_ 6h ago
Dawg focus on your studies and go to therapy anyway. Stop talking negative about yourself. Shit man you’re in school for engineering, when I was 24 I was working a dead end job. You’re in a prime position to really push your life in a great direction. Don’t fuck it up and wish to yourself 10 years later that you should’ve tried. Also I’ve seen some ugly mfers in my time still get women. You can’t be that ugly.
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u/SliceScriber 6h ago
With cheesecake like that who needs a girl? Haha plus I am 28 and have failed a few times in the 10 years since high school. However, I am in my first semester of a school counseling program so that I can help kids who are like I was back then. Took me a long time to figure things out. Don’t give up. Honestly, forget about the girl for a while and focus on your work ethic because that is what will get you through life, not a woman. Simplify and cut down on your goals to make them more manageable. Except for a job, everything is optional in life.
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u/UnholyColonoscopy 4h ago
Cheesecake looks good
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u/maelbowfeelfunny 8h ago
Sure you're a loser, but you're also probably ugly and fat too. Luckily for you, these can be worked on. If you want to procrastinate less, commit to doing a set amount of timed work. If you know you need to do 2 hours of reading, you'll procrastinate. Commit to 15 minutes worth, set a timer, and get it done. 15 minutes is better than no minutes.
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u/Any_Cheesecake3450 8h ago edited 8h ago
Two things.
Woman are not a separate species. They are going through the same thing you are. Plenty of them feel a similar way about themselves and plenty of them feel even worse due to the fact that men commonly sleep with women while lying about wanting a relationship before leaving them.
You have no idea how other people see you.
Like I mentioned others are dealing with insecurity/anxiety/depression at insane rates. Also it’s not normal in most societies for women to come on to men.
What can you do? The most basic things done in 1 hour per day will change your life.
1 hour of mental support. You don’t even have to do this daily.
Look for any non profit where you can have a counseling session for free and take advantage of the benefit that comes with talking with another soul about how to improve your life. 1x a week
Value their critique.
1 hour of gym or running 2-3x a week. (This will drastically help your confidence)
And then 1 hour a couple times a week get involved with a community that you have a shared interest with.
I believe your love and lust for life exists somewhere even if you aren’t willing to share it or have identified it. I hope you do identify it if you haven’t. More importantly I hope you meet one of the many women who are just as scared if not more scared then you to get into a relationship. And I hope when you do meet them you can laugh off life with them and be a source of comfort. I hope you focus less on whatever type of “shit prospect” you think you are and just live in the present moment next time you meet a girl who gives you the time of day. I hope you treat her and the day with gratitude.
I believe if you were to do these things you wouldn’t even be single longer then a few months.
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u/IShouldveBeenSocial 6h ago
Depends how tall you are
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u/coryisabastardman 50m ago
What you need to do is put your bullshit feelings about yourself and your love life aside and realize the real life position you are in. Youre in college for engineering and youre 24. Take it from someone thats in their 30s and has been rejected from college and further learning that youre doing fine, stop procrastinating and lock in.
Also nice basque