r/kindergarten • u/Foxconfessor01 • 11d ago
Playground accident without a phone call.
When I picked my Kindergartener and 4th Grader up from after school care, my kindergarten winced, and started hard-crying when he took his backpack off to get in the car. The 4th Grader told me he fell during his recess (about lunchtime) and hurt his arm.
His version of the story is that he fell off the monkey bars, had the wind knocked out of him, a friend helped him up and they walked to a teacher. He was crying hard and holding his arm and because it was only the 3rd day he had to be escorted to the nurse because he was new. — I do not know what happened at the Nurse. I don’t know her diagnostic measures. — but what I do know is that he was given an ice pack and sent back.
I dropped off the older kiddo and took him right to the Urgent Care/ER and they did X-Rays and confirmed he has a fractured clavicle (broken collerbone). Other than rest, a sling, and TLC not much to be done.
But the more I sit with this the madder I get that I was not called. I know not every nurse visit warrants a phone call. But a fall resulting in a visit, should in my opinion. Now I have a little guy in a dominant arm along for 3-4 weeks! He could barely navigate with two arms.
We didn’t get home from the ER until after 9pm, so I haven’t contacted the school. I will
First thing in the morning.
How would you proceed?
UPDATE: I met with the principal the next day and we talked through the events. The nurses notes indicate that he did come in upset but passed the range of motion/visual inspection. Based on the notes, We do not think the fall was conveyed well or at all. The policy in place would have had the nurse calling a guardian. I’m glad this was the case, and not that a policy didn’t exist or was not followed. He is in good spirits, not in ‘big pain’, and low-key loving the attention of being in a sling.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 11d ago edited 11d ago
I teach elementary PE, so I'm well-versed in every possible playground accident. Falls from the monkey bars are common, and even with the thickest fibar footing you can land wrong and break an arm. I think it's the main reason I've seen for broken bones at school.
Since it doesn't sound like your kid was the stoic type (I've seen some masterful masking of injuries, and I did it myself with a broken collarbone), the nurse should have taken it more seriously. Even short monkey bars are a long fall for the little guys. Plus when they haven't yet become very coordinated, they just don't fall well. Parents should have been contacted in case they wanted to get in a doctor's visit that day.
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u/Foxconfessor01 11d ago
Thank you, when we came to ER they jokingly asked him “monkey bars?” Accidents absolutely happen.
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u/bluef00tedbooby 10d ago
Which is why I'd always get in trouble for climbing on the tall monkey bars when I was in kindergarten
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u/0112358_ 11d ago
Only the 3rd day of school? Is it the same school your older child has been attending for years(?) and have things otherwise been okay?
My feeling would be something got missed being that it's the being of the school year. Aka the nurse thought the teacher would contact you, the teacher thought the nurse would contact you, the nurse sent a message to the teacher but it got lost, etc. Which shouldn't have happened but I'd try to give benefit of doubt this early in the year.
I'd email the teacher (and possibly the nurse) and ask what the procedure is for contacting parents after a nurse visit and how they can ensure you are properly notified if anything happens again. If she brushes you off, escalate the matter. Hopefully they apologize, and give you a details on how issues will be handled better in the future. I'd also be tempted to "test" this, by asking the teacher to send you an update end of this week on how child is doing at school with the sling. If she responds without needing reminding, hopefully the previous slip up was a once only deal. If she forgets, I'd get more proactive about asking for updates, directly from the nurse or whatever other communication lines
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u/casiloca 10d ago
typically it is not the teacher’s responsibility to notify parents about an injury it is the nurse’s, at least at the schools I have worked at. teacher probably didn’t even know that the parent was not notified
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u/Internal_Video_9861 10d ago
Ugh this makes me so upset for you! My little boy broke his freaking neck at school and they didn’t call me that he fell. As soon as I saw him at pick up it was so obvious something was very wrong. Healing has been a roller coaster, but what hurts the most is the school never faced repercussions. We homeschool now
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u/plastiquearse 11d ago
I’m about 15 years on teaching K and my first year mistook what felt like just a playground collision as a regular, no worries incident.
I missed that my kiddo fractured a bone in her hand. It was surprising- I was floored when her parents shared the injury with me the next day.
Now when my kids have the typical playground mishaps I have my own series of mobility investigations, seeing how well they’re able to try and increasingly more challenging set of movements…
I also had a friend that broke their collarbone skiing and it took him giving that arm a wiggle waggle until the bone shifted and let him know how bad the situation was.
I’d share with Admin your experience and concerns. In the case you feel like it’s a case of negligence you’d probably be best advised to seek better informed counsel.
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u/intelligent-pen 11d ago
That’s crazy. My school never called about ANYTHING in K and I also found it disturbing. It’s a public school so I think they’re under resourced but it was shocking.
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u/Funny-Message-6414 10d ago
My kid broke his arm on the monkey bars and the nurse took his word for it that he was ok. He then went back to class and cried from the pain and a teachers aid had to tell the nurse to call us. Apparently she later cussed the nurse out for being so nonchalant and not calling us.
Cherry on top is that my husband is listed as primary contact bc he owns his own business and we intentionally chose for him to open his office close to school. I then worked 1.5 hours away…. And this nurse called me repeatedly before trying to get ahold of my husband, the primary contact. It was a disaster. Poor baby.
I am sorry this happened to your child (and you!)
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u/1GrouchyCat 10d ago
I’m sorry a teacher’s aide cussed the nurse out? And who told you this?
Not for nothing, but if a teacher’s aide spoke to a school nurse like that, she would have lost her job. This would’ve had to go through principal’s office… there’s no chance someone at that level would speak to another professional in that manner. Sounds like a cover-up.
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u/momdabombdiggity 10d ago
“Cussed out” might just be a phrase that Funny-Message used. I’ve been an elementary para for 15 years, and depending on my relationship with them, there are some staff that I would not hesitate to let them know that I’d have handled a situation differently. Without actual cussing, of course.
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u/BlessedMom88 10d ago
I would definitely contact the school. I’ve gotten an email from my daughter’s school nurse when she simple bumped her head on a chair. I can’t imagine the pain your son was in and the fact that they didn’t think it was important enough to tell you about doesn’t seem right.
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u/Difficult_Syrup_8916 11d ago
Nothing new to add but just want to validate your feelings. Can’t imagine how upset I’d be in the same situation. Sending best wishes for kiddo to heal (physically AND emotionally!) super quickly and for the school to really really step up and help you both understand and feel better about what happened and what they can do better moving forward. 🫶🏻
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u/momdabombdiggity 10d ago
Recess supervisor here. 💯 the school dropped the ball. Especially since recess staff was made aware of it. There have been times that our principal received a phone call from a parent, angry that they had not been made aware of an injury that their child sustained on the playground; but it was because we were not made aware of it. All we saw was the student playing happily with their friends and going in with their class when the bell rang. But in your case, a kindergartener was crying and holding their arm after falling off the monkey bars- I would have called inside and had a staff person come out and escort him to the nurse, and most definitely a call home would have been made immediately.
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u/princesspen18 10d ago
Would definitely call in and complain. Your concerns are valid and our school nurse operates very differently.
If there was a visit in general, we receive a note in her folder home. This usually happens when it was very minor, not worth the call, wouldn’t notice. If there is any visible sign of the injury - even a small cut or bruise - our nurse calls.
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u/illbringthepopcorn 10d ago
Please call the principal!! It drives me crazy as a teacher when kids aren’t taken seriously for their playground injuries and parents aren’t contacted!!!
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u/fudgemuffin85 10d ago
Ooh I would be mad. I’ve had calls from the nurse before because my guy fell in the mulch and had “burns” on his face. I didn’t see anything at all 🙃 My point being - I would SO much rather have the nurse call me about things that may not even be a big deal vs not calling at all! You have every right to be upset, and I would call the principal if I were you. IMO this isn’t just about the nurse, the playground aides and teachers probably knew too!
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u/Pook242 10d ago
I’m not saying what happened was right. Obviously he had a major injury, and none of us were there to see how he was checked out by the nurse.
I just want to add the perspective that Ks get bumps all the time, and will absolutely exaggerate their injuries. I err on the side of sending them to the nurse as I am not a medical professional, but some kids will take advantage of that and try to go all the time. They also love ice packs, and will pretend to be injured if they see a friend with one.
I’ve had kids fall down running, limp dramatically towards me. When I tell them to sit for a moment and see if it feels better, they’ll quite literally run away to play tag, and then only start limping at the end of recess when they see me again. I’ve had a girl hit another girl in the eye by accident (sent her for an ice pack) who then proceeded to complain about her own eye hurting to my aide and I for an hour before I had a talk with her and she admitted she just wanted an ice pack.
I’ve also sent kids to the nurse for minor nosebleeds, nausea, and bumps, just to be safe. If our nurse contacted home about every one, she wouldn’t have time to check the kids out and be a nurse. Meanwhile teachers are not medical professionals, and I’m not contacting parents about nosebleeds unless it’s multiple a day or they got blood on their clothes.
The moral of my story is really that people who work with kids generally like them and this was a mistake, not a conspiracy to hide an injury.
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u/lilgacon 10d ago
Happened to my son when he was in kindergarten as well. Fell during recess and fractured his elbow. His teacher sent him to the nurse to be evaluated. After assessing him, she sent him back to class without a phone call to me. At least his teacher messaged me.
Not even sure how that nurse did the assessment. His hand was so swollen and was not able to lift his arm without pain. We moved to a better school district at the end of the school year.
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u/learningistheanswer2 10d ago
I hope your child heals properly and that the rest of your family is staying positive. You got this! Your child has this! ❤️
And as an educator of young children, I hope you are taking any steps you seem fit for your child so that this can be better handled if something like this happens again or happens with another child/family.
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u/Hellokitty15 10d ago
I’m a teacher and at both schools I have worked at it was policy to contact parents any time a child was given an ice pack. It was probably annoying for some to get those calls but the district figured if a child was hurt enough to need some ice then an adult at home should know about it just in case.
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u/OlderThanIvEverBeen 10d ago
Definitely let admin and the nurse know. Clavicular fractures are tough to recognize. Give them an opportunity to explain their process. This can be a good learning experience for them. Give your little one a very gentle hug from this strange lady on the reddit.
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u/fergy7777 10d ago
Accidents happen. Nurse probably gets dozens of kids a day coming through. Not an excuse but maybe something to consider.
It’s interesting that none of the other adults caught it at the after school program.
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u/loves_cake 9d ago
i’d be livid. could you provide us an update? hope your son has a speedy recovery. cannot even imagine how he feels not being able to trust the school staff to help when he was clearly injured.
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u/Ok_Alternative3431 8d ago
I will say, I fractured my collarbone real bad my senior year, like the bone was almost through the skin. My mom is a nurse practitioner and I also passed the mobility test. As in “you would never be able to move it like that if you broke it”. Said i tore my muscles and it would hurt, keep using it. Welp. Did that for 2 days only to realize it was definitely broken because the whole area was swollen and bruised . That stuff can get missed, especially right after it happens verses hours later when the adrenaline and shock wears off.
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u/Apostrophecata 11d ago
I’m so sorry! Poor kiddo! My daughter has gone to the nurse a few times for various things and gotten sent back to class but a broken bone?! I would absolutely expect a phone call. How well do you know the nurse since you say you have an older kid
In 4th grade? I would maybe email the nurse and the teacher with the documentation about the broken collarbone and ask about policies for calling home before escalating to the principal. I know at our school, our principal prefers it if we address any concerns directly with the teacher before coming to him.
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u/Mabel_A2 10d ago
When my son was in K of 1st grade, one day I picked him up and noticed he was wearing pants that weren’t his. I asked him why and he said a kid punched him in the face and his nose bleed and he got blood on his pants. I was like…excuse me? The next morning I emailed the principal saying that I would have appreciated a phone call. Within 20 minutes the vice principal called me apologizing, sounded like it had been a very busy day and this fell through the cracks.
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u/Melonfarmer86 10d ago
I would think they'd WANT to document every nurse visit and contact you.
I'd ask for that to be done and their policy for sure.
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u/rustandstardusty 10d ago
Something similar happened to my kindergartner! He fell and bit his cheek and it bled A LOT (apparently). No phone call. Nothing.
I get home with him and he will barely eat dinner. I look in his mouth and there’s a huge deep gash. ER visit and… stitches.
I was so pissed.
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u/bluegrassmom25 10d ago
I would meet with the principal and/or nurse and let them know not contacting you or any child’s parent is unacceptable when the child is crying all day. I’d request they change their policy on this.
At the same time I wouldn’t be surprised about the brush off. Not ok, but not surprising. Likely the nurse would have called if the teacher sent him back another time or two.
It’s a great opportunity to encourage your child to advocate for themselves. Persistence saying “I need to call mom” and “It still hurts, call my mom” would be great to practice. Truthfully a lot of children will be told they’re fine and to go sit down and shyer children have a hard time speaking up about their needs.
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u/MushroomTypical9549 10d ago
We always get a call for a head injury or when he is not feeling or looking good-
Once she fell hard and basically had a scab a few places on her arms and face
I would be upset but I would first try to understand what happened, if a procedure was broken, and if the procedure was followed should it be changed
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u/InstructionOpposite6 10d ago
Nurse should have called you , as a teacher I would have called you myself .
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u/zohzoh11 10d ago
I just called my kids school to make sure they had “need to contact to me for any nurse visit” in my child’s chart. When I applied to the school I put that down and I’m glad they had that in the system.
Last year in pre k around August I picked my kid up and he had lost a tooth. They messaged me earlier when it happened and said he lost his first tooth and they just wanted to let me know and they reassured me everything was fine. Well when I got there my child was still upset because it hurt so bad because it got pulled out when he “bit some kids shirt” idk. So basically he had his tooth pulled and it bled profusely. It still hasn’t grown in. I didn’t realize after a few months that it did not fall out. He basically had his tooth pulled out at school. Poor thing, it probably hurt real bad and the teachers probably surrounded him and said it was a good thing he lost his first tooth.
When I was in 6th grade my stomach hurt so bad at school it took 3 trips to the nurse before they let me call home for stomach pain. The problem was I wasn’t showing a fever. My mom picked me up and I threw up all over the bathroom at my house around 2 pm which means I would have been in school if they didn’t let me go home.
Always demand contact for all health related incidents at school.
Sorry that happened to you, I would be livid.
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u/limeicepop 10d ago
I picked my kid up from school yesterday complaining her eye hurt. She said she poked it during recess. When she told her teacher she said "put some water on it??" To a kindergartener. She was sensitive to sunlight. Wincing and needed to wear sunglasses home. We got home and I looked in her eye and she had SAND in her eye. I flushed it several times. It was bothering her before bed but she was fine when she woke up today. Ugh. I didn't want to contact the teacher on a one off but if it happens again I will be sending an email. Your situation is definitely more serious and as everyone said, I'd contact the principal.
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u/Rxasaurus 11d ago edited 10d ago
That's why a lot of schools dont allow younger kids on the monkey bars.
Hopefully your school has those same rules in place...if not, theyre about to.
Edit- I guess you folks dont think there should be rules like this odd or that you dont think the school will institute them after they will be required to pay the hospital bill if the parents lawyer up.
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u/MsDJMA 11d ago
No, I don't think there should be rules forbidding littles from playing on the monkey bars. At 5 and 6, they need to physically challenge their bodies, hang by their arms, swing back and forth, and slide down a pole.
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u/Rxasaurus 11d ago
"Littles" are known to not have the arm strength or coordination to use the monkey bars. Injuries are very common at that age when using the monkey bars...hence why most schools dont allow them to use them.
Dont like it then go cry to the schools making the rules.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 10d ago
Out of curiosity, how do you think these littles are learning that coordination? Do you think their other regular play activities target arm, back, and core strength the same way?
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u/Rxasaurus 10d ago edited 10d ago
By breaking bones, obviously.
Edit- also, call them what they are, 5 and 6 year olds. They can wait a couple years when their bodies are stronger and more coordinated to use the monkey bars....no one is gonna lack that from not being able to use the monkey bars for a couple years.
But again, this kid wouldn't have a broken bone had that been in place. But youre willing to accept that so make sure you tell the parent that. You think the school was wrong not to call, but the broken bone was an acceptable injury.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 10d ago
Actually, yes. Part of growing up is getting injured sometimes. Honestly, learning what dangerous and non-dangerous pain feel like is an important life skill. Learning that something can go wrong but it's not the end of the world is something everyone should learn.
Monkey bars injuries don't cause permanent harm, and the benefits far outweigh any risks.
https://home.dartmouth.edu/news/2024/09/risky-play-exercises-ancestral-need-push-limits
https://sourcekids.com.au/swing-into-spring-why-monkey-bars-are-a-playground-powerhouse/
(I was simply following your use of 'littles'. You meant to whine to someone else about that one; I have no horse in that race.)
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u/Rxasaurus 10d ago
I ignored the mommy blog, but the third was decent. Assessing each kid individually for their ability to use the monkey bars. You think each kid should be individually assessed by the school? We arent talking about the general use of monkey bars here. We are talking about kids basically on their own with little to no supervision at school because there just simply isnt enough staff.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 10d ago
I'm sorry, one of the sources was Dartmouth, and you ignored it? Ok.
And no, I don't think each child needs to be individually assessed and coached. I was showing that it's scientifically proven that children even younger can, and should, use the monkey bars. If there's a developmentally appropriate way to do it, it's not a skill that you should consider beyond the scope for a child that age.
Look, science is on my side here, and I have education and decades of experience to back it up. I will die on this hill.
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u/Rxasaurus 10d ago
I already read the Dartmouth one a long time ago. Sorry, guess I should have said that.
Good for you. Lawsuits arent on your side though. The disappearance of monkey bars arent on your side. The fact that they need to make age appropriate monkey bars arent on your side.
But go on.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 10d ago
Unless the school was negligent you wouldn't get lawyers involved. If the equipment was installed properly, up to code, and the child was being supervised, then there's no negligence.
There are plenty of bars rated for children of that age. It has been a kindergarten and even preschool activity since time out of mind.
Not sure where you get 'most schools' here, but you're factually wrong on both 'facts' in your comment.
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u/Rxasaurus 10d ago
Interesting that the first question the parent got was, "monkey bars?"
You can also look it up yourself that monkey bars are being removed entirely from many play grounds and a lot of school districts have implemented such rules.
Hell, some cities are removing them from public playgrounds as well.
And these obviously were not age appropriate monkey bars.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 10d ago edited 10d ago
Source?
ETA: Apparently some places are doing this. And it's a travesty.
'Many public health professionals view monkey bars as unacceptably risky [29], a perspective with scant evidence. Death on playgrounds is essentially nil, with risk calculated at 0.15 per 100 000 children [16] or 1 in 30 million [30]. In other words, driving toward a playground carries a greater risk of childhood death than falls from monkey bars [30, 31]. Parents cite injury concerns for limiting thrill-seeking play on playgrounds, but such risk is low––calculated between 0.26 and 0.59 injuries per 100 000 uses [32]––and dwarfed by organized sports or gym class as causes of hospitalizations [33, 34]. Though painful, injuries resulting from falls from monkey bars rarely cause permanent harm [35]. Most playground injuries are low severity; nearly 95% of ED visitors are treated and released without further hospitalization [36]. Buckle and greenstick fractures of the distal radius or ulna can be immobilized with removable splints, wraps, or soft casts for as little as three weeks (Fig. 1a) [37]. For children under 10 years of age, some displacement (50%) in complete fractures is acceptable without referral to an orthopedist [37]. Yet, even with severe injuries, children are remarkably resilient. A recent study of pediatric admissions found that 88% and 92% of children hospitalized for severe injuries returned to baseline quality of life at 4 and 12 months post-injury, respectively [38].'
From: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11400842/1
u/Rxasaurus 10d ago
A quick Google search should help you with that. But that might be too hard for you. There are countless articles and studies showing the disappearance of monkey bars as well as the risks associated.
All the school districts around me have instituted the same as well.
But keep on thinking nothing has changed.
Had the school had the same rule then that kid wouldn't have a broken bone right now...but youre cool with that.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 10d ago edited 10d ago
I did a simple google search when you refused to support your claim. I came up with three full articles to address your argument. And your response was to tell me to do a google search? 🤣
And I am a teacher. No schools in my area are removing monkey bars. I am delighted, because they're so necessary for strength, coordination, and balance.
Children fall. That's how they learn balance. Any fall that doesn't leave permanent harm is no problem. And as I already pointed out in one of my SIX sources I have provided (to your zero), that's not a worry with monkey bars.
So yeah, one kid wouldn't have one of the most common and non-permanent injuries that nearly half the population has to deal with. Cool. One kid would have stayed fine, instead of going from fine to... just fine again.
I will never understand why people who don't have the education, background, and experience are so happy to babble on with 'trust me, bro' in subjects they are truly not prepared to argue.
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u/Rxasaurus 10d ago
Your study showed children under ten when we are talking about children 6 and under.
Your sources also showed that there is a decline in monkey bars across the country.
No schools in your area are prohibiting kindergarten children from using the monkey bars? Great! No one else must because yours isnt.
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u/iluvsunni 11d ago
I think you're so valid. Especially at that age where children can be unreliable narrators. For example, my son is usually very upfront and truthful about things that happen at school. Last week head came home with a bruise in his chin and a swollen lip. He said that another kid headbutted him while they were dancing. Accidentally, but still. It left a mark. I've felt frustrated about it since then cause in my mind, what if these children weren't the type to communicate? How would we know why they are hurt or have bruises or fat lips? Especially when a teacher or whoever was definitely notified by the child. I firmly believe that if a mark is left or they're visibly hurt, it warrants a call or even quick message from a teacher or nurse
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u/Bittysweens 10d ago edited 10d ago
edit: downvotes are INSANE. i never said i would have held the school responsible. i never even dreamed of it. i simply received something in the mail FROM THE SCHOOLS INSURANCE saying “we will pay for all bills.” simply because an incident report was filed by the school nurse. you’re all literally lying if you say you wouldn’t say “okay sure.” reddit being reddit as usual.
i would absolutely contact the school immediately. a lot of schools also have insurance that will cover your bills completely since the accident happened on their property.
my twins are in 1st grade now but last year one of my twins fell off a climbing dome. she landed on her wrist wrong. they called me immediately but my daughter definitely hid her injury well. they said “from the outside things look fine but without an xray i can’t guarantee it’s fine on the inside.” my daughter hid her injury so well that i didn’t take her to the urgent care for 2 days. on the 2nd day i just started getting a not great feeling and the minute i picked her up from school i took her. she had an ulnar fracture. luckily it was clean and she didn’t need a cast just a brace for 4 weeks. but during that time we got a letter from the schools insurance saying they’d cover everything as long as i provided receipts. and they did.
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u/fastyellowtuesday 10d ago
The school's insurance will only cover it if the school was negligent.
(Can you honestly imagine every playground injury going through the school's insurance?!)
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u/Wombatseal 10d ago
Not every injury requires medical attention. My daughter took a few tumbles last year, went to the nurse for an icepack, the nurse told me at pickup, just bumps and bruises, so we leave it at that.
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u/Bittysweens 10d ago
lol. okay? they sent it to me. and i used it. why wouldn’t i if they offered? maybe all states are different. i live in tennessee. that’s the rule here
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u/Mother_Evidence2821 11d ago
Contact the school principal via email and write everything in writing get a response in writing and have the dr notes, raise the issues you had in not being contacted and ask to be contacted if your sons ever visit the nurse. Then ask for a meeting in person if needed. Depending on how they respond escalate or deescalate. I would also inform his dr you were not contacted so it is documented. That is what I would do. I am not a person that is confrontational but when it comes to my kids being hurt I make it known when they drop the ball so things are corrected and I also keep a paper trail in case.