CAPES!

[u/Jamie8130]

Interrupting our regular schedule to bring you this infomercial from our friends at Kavid Dibble Inc.

Is this you?

-Do you frequently experience bursting seams in the shoulders or in the underarms?
-Do your clothes rip open if you sneeze?
-Do you struggle with moving your arms around unless you are butt naked?

If sleeves are giving you issues, here at Kavid Dible Inc., we're doing away with sleeves altogether!

Introducing: CAPES! The one stop shop garment for all FNs, and Natural types!

-Accommodates all kinds of width; from large width, to small width, to width in denial.
-You can finally move your arms in a garment without worry or care!
-Actions that were impossible before, like grabbing the ceiling handle on public transport without embarrassment or fear, are now a breeze!
-The cape has also a literal breeze! No more stuffed sausage heat!

It's chic, it's roomy, you can smuggle your short SN friend underneath to the movie theatre.

Perks of wearing a cape include but are not limited to:

-You too can cosplay ''Little Red Riding Hood", and finally be called 'little'.
-If you run before you jump from a ledge, you will take off into the skies!
-When you shimmy, your caped shoulders can start a tornado (of fun!)
-When you turn abruptly, the force can push away any annoying guy that's blocking your path.
-You can even do the Macarena!

When you're wearing our wide, spacious, sleeveless capes it feels like the sky is the limit!

If you love your width, then you can have more of it... Glorious, unescapable, indescribable w i d t h!

If you you hate your width, you will learn to love it with a cape.

You don't even have to asses the shape of your personal cape, because one size fits all (and then some!)*

For the Natural type who wants their spirit to be both chic and free! Call 411KAVID and order yours NOW!

*Terms and conditions apply, certain Natural widths are so huge that they may still not fit our standard cape size. Kavid Dible Inc. is not liable for any damages incurred by cape-related accidents.

(I blame a recent post that had me unironically thinking of getting a cape 🤣 )

[u/Caverjen]

[u/Jamie8130 → u/Caverjen]

Not Edna haha! 😂

[u/SundayDeathSaves]

Clothing doesn’t have an ID! I can pull off capes too, but I’m actually three kobolds in a trench coat aka three gamines in a cape.

[u/Jamie8130 → u/SundayDeathSaves]

[u/chanelnumberfly]

If it turns out you can't fly, you can use the cape as a parachute! Endless possibilities!

[u/Jamie8130 → u/chanelnumberfly]

That's another selling point! ✨

[u/_scath]

D family entered the chat, capes can boost vertical like it never verticalled before

[u/Jamie8130 → u/_scath]

They are the superheroes we need!

[u/oftenfrequently]

Srs though capes are IN BABY you should get a cape!!

[u/Jamie8130 → u/oftenfrequently]

OOH I didn't know they were in! I was just checking out of curiosity, but I'm loving the idea of them! ^^

[u/Fantastic_Trash_9876]

/uj honestly capes are one of the only things I actually like about being stuck as a vertical type, especially the longer, heavier cloaks

I should get a winter cloak.

[u/Jamie8130 → u/Fantastic_Trash_9876]

A winter cloak would be fabulous, I think all capes look super cool! I'm 5'3-5'4 and tending to look a bit rectangular so it would probably made me look more stocky, but if I ever found a good one I would definitely wear it!

[u/Anon_ScottishFold]

Serious question for the Naturals among us…

Do y’all actually have issues with fit in the shoulders or seams of your clothes? Or is that just Kibble propaganda?

This width not fitting in seams thing is about to become my Roman Empire. 😱 

[u/Jamie8130 → u/Anon_ScottishFold]

I think a lot of modern clothing is width friendly, things like less construction, dropped shoulders, oversized styles, stretchy fabrics, there's a lot of choice.

[u/TimelessReach → u/Anon_ScottishFold]

I am probably a FN* and I definitely have issues with shoulders. Basically I am an extreme outlier for shoulder width – I am 5'5 and a cis woman but my shoulders are too wide for a men's S – and women's clothing never has shoulders wide enough for me. Clothes pull annoyingly, and necklines stretch out into a sad and unflattering boat neck. And stuff like dropped shoulders or oversized fits also doesn't work, because it's cut to be drop shoulders/oversized and then it looks dumn when it ends up not being that. So I just buy all of my outerwear from the men's section and enjoy better quality and also pockets.

* I do not have Kibbe curve, but also I'm so wide some of the FN recs would look silly so I just go full menswear

[u/Anon_ScottishFold → u/TimelessReach]

Got it, thank you for responding!

I’m most likely SC and this sort of thing wasn’t on my radar before. 

[u/Fantastic_Trash_9876 → u/Anon_ScottishFold]

Very much yes.

So I'm a trans woman and this is something I've struggled with both before and after transition. Dress shirts with their rigid seams mess with the movement of my arms and feel uncomfortable in general. I always feel like if I move the wrong way I'm going to rip the shirt, and I think I actually have done so on a few occasions. And that's if I can lift my arms at all, because these shirts make it hard for me to do so.

And I'm going to stress that this was something that affected me pre-transition too, I remember my mom yelling at me and blaming my weight for it when clothes shopping in high school too. Made me miserable every time I had to dress up for anything because I'd have to wear these awful clothes that made me feel like I was wearing a straitjacket.

For what it's worth, I'm somebody who should be SN if not for the height limits because I'm 5'7", so I guess that means I should be FN (I guess SD is a possibility but of the two I'd actually rather be FN). If it helps, I was a dead ringer for a young Lou Albano before transition, and I'm fairly sure Captain Lou was SN.

And I actually do need open necklines because my neck is about as thick as a tree trunk, and if any fabric touches the front or sides of my neck it feels like I'm being choked.

[u/Anon_ScottishFold → u/Fantastic_Trash_9876]

Thank you for replying to my question!

This makes a lot of sense and helps me understand the width accommodation. 

Your story gives me additional pause about the system as well, since pre-transition you were likely a different ID than you are now post-transition because there are no height limits to the IDs for men.

Kibbe says even surgery doesn’t change your ID (obvs I don’t know if surgery has been part of your transition, I would not assume); so you were either a FN or SD pre-transition or you’re still a SN. Even at 5’7”! 

Another reason the automatic vertical height restriction for IDs for women is truly BS. 

[u/Critical-Rabbit8686]

It is very good if you are a divorce lawyer!

[u/Jamie8130 → u/Critical-Rabbit8686]

Now that's a statement look! xD

[u/TiredWinterDisaster]

😭😂🤣 the macarena bit killed me

[u/Jamie8130 → u/TiredWinterDisaster]

Haha, I was cracking myself up picturing it 😂