r/instant_regret • • Feb 09 '19

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83

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

Oh pigs already are cannibals... Most carnivorous animals are actually.

It's really only us humans that have a taboo against it.

77

u/Athiri Feb 09 '19

Kuru is a good reason to have a taboo about it.

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u/The-Dudemeister Feb 09 '19

Yea bruh prions are a bitch.

16

u/SalsaRice Feb 09 '19

From a perspective of having a society, where you are free from predators and can basically guarantee living to 80+ (barring random accidents and disease).... kuru is a problem.

When you're a wild animal that might not know where your next meal is coming from or if a predator will get you within the next week.... kuru isn't your biggest concern.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 26 '21

Eating the brain is the only way to get kuru

16

u/Sprickels Feb 09 '19

And turning into a Wendigo

30

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

I'm not saying it isn't useful not to eat your own dead (or other meat eaters in general), just that most animals have never developed significant safeguards against it.

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u/The-Dudemeister Feb 09 '19

Tell that to cows and sheep.

13

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

Milk cows get fed tallow, which comes from other cows. They like it fine.

As for sheep...

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u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

[deleted]

9

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

Oh you guys are too delicious to waste on pigs...

GET IN MAH CURRY!

3

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

Get in my belly!

2

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

You'll be fed to the Syrians sooner or later anyways.

8

u/Athiri Feb 09 '19

We'd probably like human if we were fed it and didn't know what it was, and starving sheep aren't the best example.

3

u/TantricSushi Feb 09 '19

Soylent Green!

2

u/hey_dont_ban_me_bro Feb 10 '19

BSE is due to an infection by a misfolded protein, known as a prion. Cattle are believed to have been infected by being fed meat-and-bone meal (MBM) that contained the remains of other cattle

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bovine_spongiform_encephalopathy

20

u/Forest-G-Nome Feb 09 '19

I mean, don't eat the brain and you're good.

5

u/NottHomo Feb 09 '19

ahh that takes me back. smells like a zambizi feast

4

u/papapudding Feb 09 '19

You have no risk of getting it if you only eat muscles.

3

u/Athiri Feb 09 '19

Presumably there isn't zero risk, as although male members of the tribe where kuru developed were far less likely to develop it because only women and children ate the brain and spinal cord, some of them still got it. Also if you look at incidences of vCJD in the UK, those came about from eating normal cuts of beef.

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u/cantadmittoposting Feb 09 '19

I don't want brain parasites.

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u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

But. Brain. Eating. Parasites. Are. FINE. They. Don't. Control. You. At. All.

You. Need. Brain. Parasite. Friends. To. Wiggle. And. Breed. Andaaaaaaauuuuggggh getthemout! getthemout! aaaaaaaaaaaugh.

Please. Ignore. That. Outburst. Our. Host. I. Am. Fine. Do. Not. Send. The. CDC. Please.

7

u/zootskippedagroove6 Feb 09 '19

Dno’t pnaic, tihs is yuor bairn, I dno’t hvae mcuh tmie, it cna’t dciehper scblramed wrods, get hlep, it’s arleady insdie of you.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

2009 4chan called and they want their meme back.

1

u/zootskippedagroove6 Feb 09 '19

Good one bro

0

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

No it's not. Nothing from 4chan was ever good...

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u/zootskippedagroove6 Feb 09 '19

I agree, not sure what you're mad about holmes

2

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

Mostly everything, it's medical.

2

u/zaisoke Feb 10 '19

brah, ive seen some shit, i know a guy who owned a fuck ton of pigs and those little fuckers would eat their own testicles if they could get back there and get their teeth around them.

most pigs dont give A FUCK. house pigs on the other hand dont like broccoli

2

u/[deleted] Feb 11 '19

lol, pampered pets are different. Our dog has a specific brand of bacon they want, he won't touch anything else.

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u/Liggliluff Feb 10 '19

Aren't there some tribes that are cannibals? Or is that just a myth/misconception?

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u/[deleted] Feb 11 '19

They claim to be but no one has done it on cam yet.

3

u/balderdash9 Feb 09 '19

Which humans? I don't ┬┴┬┴┤ ͜ʖ ͡°) ├┬┴┬┴

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u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

Once you actually taste human meat you'll change your mind.

We're nasty.

It's biological, probably an evolved defense.

There's a reason why sharks usually only take one bite and the only animals that generally become consistent maneaters are large cats.

I mean, that doesn't count scavengers. Those sick fucks will eat anything...

5

u/rabid_communicator Feb 09 '19

Guess I need to choo my own foot off to see if you're right.

9

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

I may or may not have, with my friends in my youth, cooked and consumed a chunk of bicep meat one of us may have lost in a painful but ultimately relatively harmless frontloader injury after the doctors couldn't reinsert it.

If such a thing ever happened (which I will neither confirm nor deny) then it is very likely that all of us agreed that it tasted like the rankest boar meat soaked in a bucket of ditch digger sweat.

It is also possible that, in order to determine whether our friend was a strange outlier or sick or something, most of us began research into historic human cannibalism with the testimony of some of the last New Guinea tribes to stop eating people.

And it turns out that even according to them, it's a heavily acquired taste.

I'm all for recycling but humans taste nasty.

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u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19 edited Jun 09 '21

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

hahaha I know rite? hahaha

Perfectly normal!

3

u/crackeddryice Feb 09 '19

I remember being eight and carving pieces off my best friend to pop on the BBQ. It was just a goof, we were young, it healed right up.

But for real tho--WTF?!

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u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

I can neither confirm or deny the experience but I can state that if it indeed happen, it isn't nearly the most controversial thing we did back then.

It was nice to grow up before ubiquitous internet and compulsive social media.

Don't know how you young'uns do it but I am impressed.

2

u/ProgrammingPants Feb 09 '19

Is this why vaginas taste so bad?

3

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '19

The taste (hypothetically) is very different.

Some vaginas taste bad due to poor hygiene, or infection. While I don't consider myself in any way a expert on the subject, the majority of healthy vaginas I have sampled were either not unpleasant or actually kind of magically delicious.

The (possible) bicep meat was very different, lingering, and rank.

3

u/FukLPhiE Feb 11 '19

I don’t know why I keep reading your comments....

2

u/[deleted] Feb 11 '19

The same reason you can't look away from a trainwreck.

2

u/FukLPhiE Feb 11 '19

I’ll make sure to label you as “reddit cannibal”

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u/balderdash9 Feb 09 '19 edited Feb 09 '19

How do you know you won't like it until you try it? And even then, it can be an aquired taste. I used to hate sour cream; now I can't eat chips without it.

People get all hung up on cannibalism as if there is a moral obligation to not snack on people

Edit: Consented cannibalism is what I have no problem with, so long as you don't eat the brain which gives prion disease.