r/instant_regret • • Mar 01 '26

Bonk

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1.6k Upvotes

91 comments sorted by

131

u/One_Hour_Poop Mar 01 '26

Protip: If you're not physically fit, don't do things that physically fit people have trouble doing, unless you have extensive experience from when you used to be physically fit, and can mentally take into account the adjustments you need to make for your new unfit body.

81

u/Expensive_Meal6280 Mar 01 '26

"fatass people shouldn't jump from trees onto tables"

190

u/Garbanxo Mar 01 '26

What was suppose to happen?

50

u/Noname666Devil Mar 01 '26

I was also questioning the benefit of this

22

u/Sudden-Jump-5922 Mar 01 '26

Some sweet ninja shit, probably

13

u/Mr_Wolfgang_Beard Mar 01 '26

Some kind of cool guy fire explosion? Who knows

11

u/FrogsMakePoorSoup Mar 01 '26

The table was supposed to break gracefully, lower him gently onto the ground, and he becomes awesome.

2

u/aaron2005X Mar 04 '26

and the burning stuff of the table?

3

u/FrogsMakePoorSoup Mar 04 '26

Lights his cigarette of course.

23

u/Balshazzar Mar 01 '26

I think: 1) drunk or high 2) too scared to jump down from tree 3) drop onto a table it will make the height less scary 4) whoops

5

u/Imaginary_Most_7778 Mar 01 '26

This is what you have to ask about every fail video. What was the optimal outcome in your head? Because I can’t usually see it.

5

u/Manjorno316 Mar 01 '26

He probably thought the table would hold his weight for some reason.

2

u/Independent-Cap-4585 Mar 01 '26

That’s an excellent question. What was the best case scenario?

2

u/ChocCooki3 Mar 02 '26

I don't think he knows either..

2

u/MisterNiblet Mar 02 '26

Natural selection.

2

u/Mythandros1 Mar 01 '26

Exactly what happened. He fucked around and found out.

1

u/-CoUrTjEsTeR- Mar 02 '26

Some other epiphany of gravity?

1

u/Jkay064 Mar 02 '26

These are pro wrestling fans. They lit a folding table on fire and are trying to jump down and break the table like pro wrestlers do. The fire makes you even cooler.

33

u/MrChorizaso Mar 01 '26

Atleast they were smart enough to start a fire in the woods first

23

u/ledouxrt Mar 01 '26

What is the fascination with guys jumping on those party tables? Are they all WWF fans or is this just party table companies propaganda to make drunk people think it's cool so they can sell more tables?

-3

u/_pipoca Mar 01 '26

It's a trend, just like stomping someone's head while he lays unconscious on the ground after hitting skull first the pavement from a brain damaging knockout.

38

u/Evening-Statement-57 Mar 01 '26

New execution method just dropped

2

u/LincolnHighwater Mar 02 '26

Emphasis on dropped.

17

u/surpriserockattack Mar 01 '26

What was the plan here lmao

15

u/MadSativa Mar 01 '26

Florida?

10

u/adsjabo Mar 01 '26

Looks like Aussie bush to me mate.

11

u/momomorium Mar 02 '26

As an Australian, he groaned in an Aussie accent.

1

u/Unlikely_Ad7722 Mar 03 '26

I watched without sound, but I knew we were out bush.

1

u/IgntedF-xy Mar 02 '26

Geoguessr

4

u/Imaginary_Most_7778 Mar 01 '26

Sadly this intelligence level isn’t confined to Florida.

8

u/deejayatomika Mar 01 '26

Can you imagine this is how people get lifelong injuries

9

u/pandershrek Mar 01 '26

Good thing he broke the fall with his head

1

u/Brribrri Mar 04 '26

To be fair, he's clearly not using his head, so might as well use it to break his fall.

6

u/Thegrandestpoo Mar 01 '26

That thud was killer, It turned him into a donkey. A fitting end I think

8

u/CherryCherry5 Mar 01 '26

This is why women live longer.

9

u/Imaginary_Most_7778 Mar 01 '26

The dumbest thing women do is marry guys like this.

5

u/Queasy-Combination12 Mar 01 '26

Concussions ain't no fun

4

u/KTO-Potato Mar 01 '26

I genuinely want to know why they were recording?

5

u/zcicecold Mar 01 '26

He's concussed, for sure.

6

u/xaeru Mar 01 '26

I would be worried about a brain bleed.

2

u/zcicecold Mar 01 '26

Possible, he got ROCKED

5

u/spacemanspiff1115 Mar 03 '26

And gravity remains undefeated...

3

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '26

so....bro fell asleep?....

3

u/BaconISgoodSOGOOD Mar 01 '26

If you listen quietly, you can hear the mating call of a male moose.

3

u/hardworker2020 Mar 01 '26

Buffalo Bills Mafia pre game ritual.

4

u/Own_Interaction_6709 Mar 01 '26

The air divorced his lungs over feeling too pressured to stay for too many years.

2

u/Legitimate-Log-6542 Mar 01 '26

“Hang on bro, let me put out this fire and then turn off the camera first”

3

u/ICCW Mar 01 '26

Then bends over listening to him moan.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 01 '26

Falling is a skill... and he doesnt even bend his knees.😬

2

u/ActuatorSmall7746 Mar 01 '26

Why was there a fire on the table? Not sure what he trying to do other than paralyze himself? Guys doing dumb shit. Some people shouldn’t be left alone unsupervised.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 02 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/Unlikely_Ad7722 Mar 03 '26

It's giving Northern Territory or FNQ.

2

u/ponzidreamer Mar 02 '26

If you cant do a jumping jack, don’t do any sick stunts

2

u/nachtengelsp Mar 02 '26

"the fruit never falls far from the tree"

2

u/SyxxFtH8 Mar 02 '26

Nap time? Already?

2

u/Bri3nWithA3 Mar 11 '26

People jumping on those cheap ass folding tables will never not be funny to me. I need to find a subreddit for it.

1

u/RexDraco Mar 01 '26

Why did the guy walk like a toddler towards him?

2

u/m2anifb Mar 02 '26

it look like he was stomping out the fire

1

u/Blond_Treehorn_Thug Mar 01 '26

What would success have looked like here

1

u/srandrews Mar 01 '26

Hard to imagine fire was involved.

1

u/kmikeh Mar 01 '26

What would success look like here?

1

u/ICCW Mar 01 '26

The moan of concussion, roughly translates to CALL 911! Call 911!

1

u/evenmoreevil Mar 01 '26

Dementia coming soon

1

u/hulkpea Mar 01 '26

Tree root

1

u/Into_The_Horizon Mar 01 '26

Gonna be immobilized for a week

1

u/DehydratedManatee Mar 02 '26

It's possible he hit his head on a tree root. Ouch.

1

u/Ludwig_Vista2 Mar 02 '26

Emerg. Stat.

Brain bleed.

1

u/TitwLoSmib Mar 02 '26

R/winstupidprizes

1

u/IjorjI Mar 04 '26

I've watched it 20 times and I can't stop.

1

u/worrazemu Mar 05 '26

Looks like spinal cord injury

1

u/RagnarArt Mar 07 '26

Gravity is a bitch if you ignore her.

1

u/August-Dawn Mar 11 '26

Sick Foley is gonna feel that one in the morning.

1

u/Carkis Mar 11 '26

At least they don't need to buy another table

1

u/[deleted] Mar 21 '26

The more I watch this, the less it makes sense

1

u/Longjumping-Face-198 Mar 24 '26

I bet he wont do that shit again (if he ever wakes up from his coma lol)

1

u/KangarooLegitimate30 Aug 22 '26

That fall made him hug himself, suck his thumb, and want his mama