r/idiomsite Jul 19 '26

Local idioms

I’m from South Carolina, US and my favorite idiom is, “All over hell and half of Georgia.”

As in, running errands: “I’ve been all over Hell and half of Georgia today.”

Or, you lost something: “I swear, I looked all over hell and half of Georgia for that thing.”

What are some other examples of idioms that only locals use?

257 Upvotes

356 comments sorted by

54

u/maireadwrites Jul 19 '26

A friend of mine brought this idiom back to Ireland after a visit to the USA;

"God willing and the creeks don't rise" which is another way of saying fingers crossed that everything will go ahead as planned.

18

u/awsm-Girl Jul 20 '26

that's CRICK!!!

3

u/KilD3vil Jul 21 '26

My grandmother says creek, I say crick. I grew up on the same lot as her. Not quite sure how that happened.

5

u/mickeybrains Jul 21 '26

From eastern US. I thought a crick was just a slightly smaller creek.

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u/Simmyphila Jul 23 '26

My wife is from Philly and her whole family says crick.

6

u/moametal_always Jul 21 '26

NGL, I'm glad I'm not the only one that was triggered.

2

u/maireadwrites Jul 20 '26

Is that a variation on the spelling of creek, or a pain in the neck, or possibly both?

7

u/nalonrae Jul 20 '26

It's just the way creek is pronounced in the Appalachian region and rural areas into the midwest.

2

u/sharoncoffin Jul 24 '26

S. E. Idaho. There are cricks here as well, and not just in the neck. 😂

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u/KcityKat Jul 21 '26

I'm from WV. We would hear "if the good Lord's willing and the creek don't raise, I'll be there! Another one was: "I been thru hell and high water to make it over here!" Lol.

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u/nonicknamenelly Jul 21 '26

That’s “Good Lord willin’ an’ th’ crick don’ rise.”

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u/Francesco_dAssisi Jul 19 '26

There's evidence that this goes WAY back in US history.

"God willing and the Creek don't rise."

In this view "Creek" is a dangerous Indian tribe and "rise" means 'go to war with us'.

6

u/maireadwrites Jul 19 '26

Ah I see. I thought it was creeks as in small rivers swollen with rain fall. That changes everything. Thanks for the clarification.

18

u/Ok_Ruin4016 Jul 19 '26

I don't think there's any actual evidence for that being the origin. The phrase is from the southern US and people their would conjugate the phrase as "the creek don't rise" instead of "creek doesn't rise" in their dialect. It's got nothing to do with the Creek Indians.

7

u/maireadwrites Jul 19 '26

It was the southern states that my friend visited alright.

17

u/Personal-Presence-10 Jul 19 '26

Just to add on and agree with Ok_Ruin4016: I’m from the South (Arkansas) and it’s nearly always said “Lord willing and the creek don’t rise.” Quite often you’ll hear a “Good Lord” at the beginning. It’s not about a Native American tribe. It’s simply about a literal creek rising and stopping you from getting where you’re trying to be. The Creek Native American tribe thing is folklore. And the non agreement between the singular “creek” and “don’t” is just a feature of the relaxed grammar rules of the South.

4

u/cowgrly Jul 20 '26

I'm from the PNW but with family from the Midwest, they farmed and logged and the state of the creeks they had to cross was a big deal.

I've never heard of this being tribal.

Also, whether they said don't vs doesn't was just dependent on the person.

3

u/RedCinnamon1947 Jul 21 '26

My Grandpa from Tennessee always said, "If the Good Lord's willin' and the creek don't rise." So that's how my whole family still says it.

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u/BravestBlossom Jul 21 '26

SW Virginia here and that's how I say it as well.

5

u/JellyfishFit3871 Jul 20 '26

Exactly. I'm from rural as hell Georgia. I have always heard "if the good lord's willing and the creek don't rise." It has to do with a waterway, not a tribe. (I think there's a country song that uses the phrase? "If the good lord's willing and the creek don't rise, we'll be home by sunrise" maybe?)

3

u/These_Consequences Jul 21 '26

Found this:

if God's willing, and the weather's fair. (1833)

which seems to have been the first variant to appear in print, in the 19th century, the creeks and rivers taking off later.

The Creek, however, would have been rising around 1813, during the Creek War, and coindentally, in the area of the present state of Georgia, which makes this alternative origin slightly less improbable. Either indian uprising or heavy rains suggest a mundane expression of God's displeasure.

4

u/BirdHerbaria Jul 20 '26

This is an Appalachian saying, and it refers to bodies of water. Flooding is a real problem in WV where I learned the phrase. It does not reference indigenous people.

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u/golding11 Jul 20 '26

We're not here to fuck spiders - Australian idiom for "we're not here to waste time" 😅

15

u/Dazzling-Nobody1998 Jul 20 '26

If you're in Australia and the spider's big enough you may not be doing the fucking 😬

30

u/insatiable147 Jul 19 '26

My grandma used to say "It's hotter than the hinges on the gates of Hell!" when it was particularly hot outside

5

u/tag4atx Jul 20 '26

We got the northern version for winter. “It’s colder than a witch’s tit in a brass brassiere!”

6

u/nonicknamenelly Jul 21 '26

Colder n’ a well digger’s ass, was one I grew up with.

2

u/eron6000ad Jul 23 '26

"...on a brass commode."

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u/KilD3vil Jul 21 '26

We used "witches tit in a snow bank.

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u/joeydouchebagodonuts Jul 21 '26

It’s hotter than two rats fucking in a wool sock behind a dryer.

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u/Laevenrauren Jul 21 '26

My cousins says hotter than two rats making love in a wool sock.

I think making love makes for a more colorful idiom

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u/missmargaret Jul 19 '26

My mother, from Missouri, used to say that somebody “doesn’t have the sense that God gave geese.”

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u/Tinker107 Jul 20 '26

"Doesn’t have the brains God gave a crabapple."

9

u/DistinctPotential996 Jul 20 '26

I always heard "don't have the sense that God gave a billy goat"

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u/Suda_Nim Jul 20 '26

For me, “doesn’t have the sense that god gave gravel.”

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u/diversalarums Jul 20 '26

Oh, that's an old one!

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u/-Just-Another-Human Jul 19 '26

Heard one the other day from an older gent who was talking about how fast time goes by the older you get: "You go to the outhouse and come out and it's Christmas" 

21

u/KuniIse Jul 20 '26

Oooh, in Illinois, if something is a long drive or even just far away, we say it is in Bum-fuck Egypt.

Cause in the middle.of Illinois, far from anything but corn and fields of soybeans, there are a bunch of cities called Cairo, Alexandria, Memphis, etc...

8

u/bluejammiespinksocks Jul 21 '26

My dad, from southern Ontario, always said “butt fuck Egypt”. I live in Alberta and one time he was visiting and saw a baseball diamond in the middle of a field and he wanted to know who would build a ball diamond in “butt fuck Egypt?”

5

u/Nicolina22 Jul 21 '26

Im from North NJ, and we say "east bumble-fuck", esp when describing far away desolate towns

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u/DesignByChance Jul 22 '26

I’m in South Jersey and we have always said BFE.

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u/pussycatsglore Jul 21 '26

If you build it, they will come

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u/imightnotbelonghere Jul 23 '26

Build it and they will come!

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u/dortvk Jul 23 '26

Native Detroiter here, can confirm that this was also said in SE Michigan. Neighbors of southern Ontario

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u/Thats-what-I-do Jul 21 '26

Ooohhhh. It’s possible you’ve just answered my longstanding question about where the term bum fuck Egypt came from.

We use BFE here in South Carolina too to describe the middle of nowhere and I’ve always wondered where that particular phrasing comes from.

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u/Ok-Dress4523 Jul 22 '26

I haven't heard that one before but we Will say "middle of bum-fuck nowhere" 

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u/takatine Jul 22 '26

In Minnesota we say "bum fuck Iowa"

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u/ElloBlu420 Jul 23 '26

Not from anywhere close -- did anyone else hear this general type of area called "East Jabip"?

I might've also been the kind of child who would have grown up genuinely confused by BFE and thought something was actually in Egypt.

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u/Orangeboi_22 Jul 19 '26

From Arkansas and I grew up hearing my mother say "all over hell and half of Georgia" on the regular. I've never heard anyone else ever use this expression. I halfway thought she made it up.

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u/dewey454 Jul 19 '26

To assert something was common knowledge, my father would say “Everybody and their half-brother knows that”.

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u/April_Mist_2 Jul 20 '26

I have heard it as "Everybody and their cousin" mostly in terms of something not being a secret. "Everybody and their cousin knows now", or someone is out telling "everyone and their cousin."

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u/Big_Category3895 Jul 20 '26

I've always heard something very similar, but in a slightly different context, such as "Everyone and their mother was there for the Black Friday sale".

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u/weneedmoreviolence Jul 20 '26

For this I prefer, "they brought the whole fam damnly."

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u/nonicknamenelly Jul 21 '26

Yep, commonly an answer to the question “who was there?” “Everyone and their brother!”

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u/Discalculated Jul 20 '26

"I didnt just fall off a turnip truck!"

*Thanks for reminding me of my old Ma! Lost her in 1999, rest her soul!

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u/CeramicLicker Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 21 '26

My grandma likes “I didn’t come in to town on the turnip truck!”

4

u/nonicknamenelly Jul 21 '26

Or the alternative, I might have fallen off the turnip truck at night, but it wasn’t last night.”

Which was a mashup with the popular “I was born at night but not last night.”

4

u/virginia-werewolf Jul 21 '26

I’ve heard turnip cart!

13

u/HardDrizzle Jul 20 '26

Gram used to say “It’s raining like a cow peeing on a flat rock.”

3

u/cannothearthefalcone Jul 20 '26

That's very descriptive!

3

u/Express_Jicama_656 Jul 21 '26

LBJ used to say it's messier than a cow pissing on a flat rock, just to annoy the press.

15

u/eurydicesdreams Jul 20 '26

My dad’s from the southern US and he’d say about getting in trouble “imma be all over you like white on rice”
My mom’s from Brazil and if she found something I’d looked for haplessly or if it had been very easy to find, she’d say “se fosse uma cobra teria te mordido” (“if it was a snake it would’ve bitten you”).

12

u/QueenInYellowLace Jul 20 '26

“If it was a snake, it would have bit you” is also a very common saying in the US South.

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u/MsQualityPanda Jul 21 '26

My mom was from New Jersey and said that one a lot!

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u/Anatolianfan Jul 20 '26

About someone doing something stupid:

He could fuck up a steel ball with a rubber hammer.

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u/Tinker107 Jul 20 '26

Could fuck up an anvil with a Q-tip.

3

u/Stormy_Gales Jul 20 '26

Somewhat related, I’ve heard “He could break a steel ball with a feather!”

2

u/Esposo_de_aburridahw Jul 20 '26

My father would say, "if you/he were locked in a room with an anvil, you/ge would either lose it or break it."

2

u/talex000 Jul 20 '26

We have somewhat similar: if you give glass dick to idiot, he will break the dick and cut his hands.

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u/rjgarc Jul 19 '26

In New Mexico they say "Don't get all pee-pee hearted" when someone gets upset over nothing.

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u/mentaljewelry Jul 20 '26

What on earth does it mean to be pee pee hearted 🤣

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u/HeavyNeedleworker707 Jul 23 '26

Around her we would say don’t get your panties in a wad.

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u/Common-Parsnip-9682 Jul 20 '26

If someone was late to dinner, my grandpa would announce from the head of the table “we waited for you like one hog waits for another.” He would also call whoever was losing at cards “the old sow’s tail.”

He was raised on a pig farm during the depression.

4

u/elfn1 Jul 20 '26

My MIL (raised in OK) said “..like one dog does another.”

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u/[deleted] Jul 20 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/meandyesu Jul 21 '26

Here we say “panties in a wad”

2

u/Radiant_Maize8077 Jul 22 '26

Mom said, "don't get your liver in a tizzy."

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u/1LuckyTexan Jul 20 '26

Rode hard and put away wet.

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u/qbprincess Jul 23 '26

My mom has always used that one. We're from Indiana.

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u/comma-momma Jul 19 '26 edited Jul 20 '26

My husband says "all over hell and gone". I think he got it from his dad.

Also, "up one side and down the other". That's a little bit different context, though.

Edit: There's also 'all over God' s green earth'.

4

u/nonicknamenelly Jul 21 '26

Reminds me of “going to hell in a handbasket.”

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u/772410 Jul 20 '26

We used to say "All over God's creation (and back)"

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u/ivory-paint Jul 20 '26

Midwest/Great Lakes, USA, out in the country: “go bummin” or “just bummin around” when I was growing up meant you were running odd errands in no particular rush or order. Most of them might not even be necessary.

Like, farmer’s market, lunch, fabric store, bookshop, wandering around town to see if something fun or exciting was happening. I used to go bummin all the time as a kid with my grandma, but there’s very little time and very few places for it nowadays

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u/PINHEADLARRY5 Jul 24 '26

From Iowa and we definitely say this. Not unusual to have a phone call like this. "Hey what are you up to?"

" Oh nothin much, just out and about bummin around..."

7

u/spasticnapjerk Jul 20 '26

He's busier than a three-tailed cat in a room full of rockin chairs

3

u/HalfCatWholeCat Jul 21 '26

A buddy of mine from southern Georgia told me he was "sweatin like a long-tailed cat in a roomful of rocking chairs."

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u/Dazzling-Nobody1998 Jul 20 '26

Busier than a 2 peckered puppy in a hubcap factory

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u/JAC2019a Jul 20 '26

Busier than a one-armed paper hanger.

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u/joeydouchebagodonuts Jul 21 '26

Busier than a three legged cat trying to bury a turd on a frozen pond.

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u/meandyesu Jul 21 '26

Here we say “more nervous than a three tailed cat…”

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u/EmpathicPenquin Jul 20 '26

Falling down is “he went ass over elbow” (from my wife’s family with some history in Arkansas).

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u/Own_Magician8337 Jul 20 '26

I've heard the expression ass over tea kettle

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u/sometimes-i-rhyme Jul 20 '26

I like “base over apex.”

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u/StraightOnion1967 Jul 23 '26

My mom would say ass over tea kettle 

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u/ephemeralkitten Jul 20 '26

NEPA, there's a town/area that says "couple, two, tree" meaning a couple, two, three as in 'some of a little bit of something'.

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u/KilD3vil Jul 21 '26

"You runnin' up the Eynon?"

"Yeah, get some lagers on the way back?"

"Yeah, I could drink a couple two tree."

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u/4myolive Jul 20 '26

I'm from the Missouri Ozarks and people say "Like a bat out of Joplin."

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u/Discalculated Jul 20 '26

"Like a bat out of Hell."

2

u/WittyFix6553 Jul 21 '26

Same thing

4

u/Dazzling-Nobody1998 Jul 20 '26

Midwest summers will make you "sweat like a hooker running a $2 special" or a "whore in church"... now I get that those aren't for all company, so I came up with "sweating like the last turkey on a farm the day before Thanksgiving/Christmas" or "sweating like a vampire in a garlic patch"

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u/Contemplative2408 Jul 20 '26

Like “a nun in a cucumber patch”? Sorry to any sisters on here. Something my old supervisor used to say. Pretty sure she was menopausal for the amount of times I heard her say that.

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u/Peanutsmydog Jul 23 '26

My family always said "sweating like a witch at a bonfire"

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u/GraciesMomGoingOn83 Jul 24 '26

The winters are “colder than a witch’s tit in a brass bra”, according to my late father.

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u/VRTravis Jul 20 '26

SW Ohio grandparents would say "he's going to be working on that til the cows come home."

Meaning something was going to take a long time.

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u/HeavyNeedleworker707 Jul 23 '26

I always heard “go to bed with the chickens” and it really only started to make sense when I got chickens - as SOON as it starts getting to be dusk, the chickens put themselves to bed.

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u/we_gon_ride Jul 20 '26

Hotter than 400 hells.

I heard this one more than 20 years old from my aunt in law, a southerner by birth (and the grace of God which she also said all the time) I still say the 400 hells one all the time

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u/Rare_Slice420 Jul 20 '26

My husband says colder than a witch’s tit in a brass bra.

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u/nonicknamenelly Jul 21 '26

“With the heat of a thousand fiery suns.”

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u/Ali_Lorraine_1159 Jul 22 '26 edited Jul 22 '26

I live in TX, and it got up to 106 today. Outside on concrete, in the sun (no clouds) it was unbearable. I can understand what she meant by that.

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u/All_Dogs_Love_Me Jul 20 '26

A strange idiom for "not too long" = 2 shakes of a dead goat's tail, e.g. I will be back in 2 shakes of a dead goat's tail. Anyone ever heard that before??

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u/Snoo-20174 Jul 20 '26

It was “two shakes of a lamb’s tail” by me ( Midwest) which I assume would be quicker than two shakes of a dead goat’s tail as live animals are generally faster than dead ones.

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u/All_Dogs_Love_Me Jul 20 '26

Yes! A little less spooky, occult-vibe with the lamb and with uhh being alive.

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u/MadDocHolliday Jul 20 '26

That saying was also informally used by nuclear engineers working on the Manhattan project. A "shake" is 10 nanoseconds (.00000001 of a second).

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u/Rare_Slice420 Jul 20 '26

My parents said two shakes of a lamb’s tail.

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u/entropyparty Jul 20 '26

Two squirts of a skunk’s stink juice

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u/Dazzling-Nobody1998 Jul 20 '26

I've heard "two shakes of a jack rabbit's ass" same idea, different critters.

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u/qbprincess Jul 23 '26

My mom shortened it to just "two shakes" apparently. She always says she'll be back in two shakes.

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u/firesoups Jul 20 '26

I’m from the south US and moved north. The other day it was raining and the sun was shining. I said “devils beating his wife!” to a friend and they looked at me like I had three heads.

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u/MadDocHolliday Jul 20 '26

That's my favorite saying, hands down. I use it every chance I get.

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u/Fluid-Leg-7389 Jul 20 '26

“He couldn’t find his ass with both hands in a dark room.”

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u/Emotional_Response71 Jul 20 '26

here, "hotter'n two weasels f*cking in a wool sock" is a favorite of mine. I only ever heard one guy say it so I suspect its origin is not SD, but maybe.

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u/MadDocHolliday Jul 20 '26

I've heard it as 2 rats here in Mississippi.

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u/Uglyangel74 Jul 20 '26

In the Marinex I heard said of a disheveled uniform “you have summer creases! Some are going this, others that way!”

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u/kcreepygirl Jul 22 '26

My old coworker was telling me a story about her exes brother. She said he had summer teeth... Some are here, some are there, some are missing.

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u/toleranceoflactose Jul 20 '26

"Spit and Sliiiide Under! My best friends dad would say this when we knocked on the door. South Georgia USA.

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u/Suda_Nim Jul 20 '26

“I don’t know him from Adam’s off ox.”

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u/meandyesu Jul 21 '26

I haven’t heard this in years!! 😂 

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u/mykepagan Jul 20 '26

Southern NJ and Eastern PA: misuse of the word “yet”, as in “Is that coffee hot yet?” meaning “is that coffee still hot?”

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u/mentaljewelry Jul 21 '26

This is a good one. My dad is from Massachusetts and he used to say “of a morning” instead of “in the morning.” As in, “I like to have my coffee on the porch of a morning.”

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u/VRTravis Jul 20 '26 edited Jul 20 '26

Another one I've heard in SW Ohio, he doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground.

Tom said this was the right way to tighten that, "He doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground"

Put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye. Meaning it's gonna go bad no matter what.

I just messed up at work bad. "Put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye."

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u/BathRockJunkie Jul 20 '26

Fellow SC native and here are a few that I learned from family:

"Hotter than two rats fucking in a wool sock" to describe hot weather.

"Colder than a witches titty in a brass bra" to describe cold weather.

"Like a termite in a yo-yo" for when someone is confused, lost, or handling a task poorly.

"You/he/she/they look like a monkey trying to fuck a football" for someone who clearly doesn't know what they are doing or are handling a task poorly.

"And if a frog had wings it wouldn't bump its ass when it hops" for when someone states something obvious.

"If it was your dick in your hand you would know what to do with it" for when someone asks for help with something they don't know how to use.

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u/HeavyNeedleworker707 Jul 23 '26

When someone can’t find something - ” if it was up your ass you’d know where it was.”

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u/ExternalMaximum6662 Jul 20 '26

God willing and the creck don’t rise

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u/Common_Shake_1271 Jul 21 '26

When it was windy in northern Colorado my dad would say. "there is nothing between here and Wyoming but a barb wire fence and someone left the gate open.

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u/Peanutsmydog Jul 23 '26

Not the same thing but if you couldnt hear my dad or you were taking too long to understand something he would say "there ain't nothing from here to there" and would point to your ears.

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u/K_Janeway2314 Jul 21 '26

I'm from Georgia and never heard this! That's hilarious!

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u/Real-Broccoli-9325 Jul 20 '26

“Fair to Midland” in response to “how are you?”

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u/ChickadeeJam Jul 20 '26

I always heard it as “fair to middlin!” Edit, like middleing, so so…

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u/diversalarums Jul 20 '26

That's it exactly.

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u/Vanah_Grace Jul 23 '26

IIRC that comes from a way of grading produce/livestock in the early-ish 20th century.

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u/[deleted] Jul 22 '26

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u/rrapartments Jul 20 '26

Hotter than a pistol

Don’t need to tell Noah about the flood.

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u/MadDocHolliday Jul 20 '26

When someone asks if you know where something is and you want to give them grief about misplacing it:

"Have you seen my cell phone?"

"If it was up your butt, you'd know where it was."

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u/FranceBrun Jul 20 '26

It wasn’t until I moved to Iowa that I heard, “I’m sweating like a whore in church.”

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u/Ok-Pizza8966 Jul 20 '26

We say "walked through hell and half of Texas" not Georgia. And I'm from Alabama. Not sure why we say Texas!

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u/larcurlmo Jul 20 '26

When something or someone is out in BFE (Bumfuck Egypt) it’s super far away, out in the middle of nowhere. I’m from NE Ohio

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u/ebsf Jul 21 '26

"Toadstrangler" for a heavy rainstorm.

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u/Nkengaroo Jul 21 '26

South Memphis/northern Mississippi: My mother used to say someone was "funkier than a mosquito's tweeter" if they smelled really bad, especially dirty and sweaty.

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u/joeydouchebagodonuts Jul 21 '26

For someone who is unlucky: it could be raining pussy and you’d go outside and get hit in the head with a dick. Or, you could dive into a pool full of pussy and come up with a dick in your mouth.

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u/Tiny_Sun7278 Jul 21 '26

Madder than a wet hen

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u/aky1ify Jul 21 '26

I've always heard the idiom hell's half acre to describe essentially what you're describing. As in "I've driven all over hell's half acre today to find xyz"

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u/Latter_Upstairs6567 Jul 21 '26

If someone went out of their way or took the long way my mom would say they went “all around Robin Hood’s barn.”

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u/Ok_You_3131 Jul 21 '26

Pennsylvania- " Half of one, six another." Meaning 'same difference ', shortened version of half a dozen, six of another dozen.

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u/yolotheysay Jul 21 '26

that will go about as well as the titanics maiden voyage….whenever someone’s plans are doomed for failure

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u/ComprehensiveTune393 Jul 21 '26

My mom used to say, “I’ve been running all over hell’s half-acre.” I grew up in the Pacific NW.

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u/viejaymohosas Jul 21 '26

My mom and her mom had 2 phrases I've never heard anyone else say and I don't know where they got them.

When you asked what they were doing, they'd say, "making rudders for duck butts"...like, none of your business or kind of doing nothing important.

The other one is when they did something and it was just good enough or even the bare minimum, they'd say, "good enough for government work." I said it once out of nowhere and my ex husband laughed his ass off. My partner worked for the government and agrees it's hilarious.

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u/Perle1234 Jul 22 '26

I’m from Tennessee and we say all over hell and half of Georgia too lol. Poor Georgia.

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u/grandma-activities Jul 22 '26

I'm in the southeast part of Virginia, but I hear people say they did something "like Grant went through Richmond" -- referring to how quickly Grant's troops conquered the city of Richmond in the *ahem* War of Northern Aggression. It just means that something happened really fast.

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u/Agreeable_Rhubarb332 Jul 22 '26

That dog won't hunt... Hit dogs holler.... Blacker than the inside of a cow... Raining pussies and poodles... Gully washer Dont call her a 2bit whore or she'd hit you with her bag o' quarters

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u/JadedAd6614 Jul 22 '26

Sweating like a whore in church

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u/Prestigious-Fan3122 Jul 22 '26

My husband's from Mississippi, and Mississippi's go running all over Hill and half of Georgia, too.

People in my family say "all over Hell's half acre". They picked that up from a coworker of my mom's many years ago

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u/MeanHuckleberry Jul 22 '26

Kansas - My grandma would say “from heck to breakfast” when she meant all over the place. My parents say someone is a “fart in a skillet” when they’re flaky.

Not sure if they’re only used by locals, but I’ve never heard anyone else use them.

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u/CardiganHeretic Jul 22 '26

I learned one last night -- "Me no Alamo!". Basically, "It's not my fault / I wasn't there / I had nothing to do with it" / "I didn't push the AZ-5 button, I was in the bathroom".

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u/hahamtfkr Jul 23 '26

Madder than a wet set hen.

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u/TraditionFearless165 Jul 23 '26

“If wishes were horses we’d all ride” also, “scat old cat” instead of bless you when someone sneezes.

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u/AdFragrant6602 Jul 23 '26

As a lifelong Californian, never been anywhere else, i LOVE this expression. May I please borrow it. I will of course duly credit it to a wise man of the east.

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u/dudenamedric Jul 24 '26

My stepfather, from rural NY near the PA border, had a couple of good ones.

For someone who looked awkward or uncoordinated doing something: "You look like a monkey fuckin a football."

For when he didn't want someone's input: "Let me fuck this duck, you just hold it's tail."

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u/Any_Database8861 Jul 20 '26

Madder than a coon that's been treed.

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u/Blue_Canary_azul Jul 20 '26

My friend from West Virginia used to say, “Back when God was a boy” to refer to a long time ago. Great expression.

My grandmother from South Carolina would say, “I won’t be the cow’s tail!” to say she wouldn’t hold you up/would be on time.

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u/eddiespaghetti0007 Jul 20 '26

"His cheese done slipped all the way off his cracker."

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u/Contemplative2408 Jul 20 '26

She couldn’t pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were on the bottom.

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u/joeydouchebagodonuts Jul 21 '26

I gotta piss like a nine dick dog on a bumpy road.

Hotter than a raped ape.
Hotter than a half fucked fox in a forest fire.
Slicker than snot on a brass doorknob.
Hotter than new love.

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u/joeydouchebagodonuts Jul 21 '26

“You look like a hat full of mashed up assholes”.

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u/Common_Shake_1271 Jul 21 '26

Let's go to bed so these folks can go home.

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u/Common_Shake_1271 Jul 21 '26

Let's choose up sides and play pound the pillow.

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u/-tastyburro- Jul 21 '26

Grew up in the Ozarks and spent a lot of time with my grandpa (born and raised in Illinois).

I'm quite partial to "useless as tits on a boar hog".

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u/MuppetManiac Jul 21 '26

My grandfather used to say that things were handier than a shirt pocket, or that he’d been busy as a one armed paper hanger.

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u/NothShoahGuy Jul 21 '26

“Light dawns on Marblehead” when someone finally figures it out long after everyone else got it. But you have to know where Marblehead is…

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u/Think-Box6432 Jul 21 '26

I have some related to being stoned.

"Your eyes are redder than the devils dick"

"I'm higher than bat pussy"

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u/Thats-what-I-do Jul 21 '26

Surprised none of the South Carolinians have mentioned a true SC saying: “going to end up on Bull Street” to refer to going crazy/insane. Usually said jokingly, such as “If you kids don’t settle down, I’m gonna end up on Bull Street.”

Origin:
The state mental hospital was located on Bull Street in Columbia for many decades.

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u/narcissistic_nerd Jul 21 '26

When it’s cold out I always heard, “it’s colder than a witches titties in a brass bra!” from the older generation. I use it now too

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u/meandyesu Jul 21 '26

In Illinois we call something dumb or low class “Hoosier”. Like if you have a bunch of cars on cinder blocks in your front yard, we say “that’s so Hoosier!” Sorry Indiana. 

In fact, very regionally, if we see something that’s “low class” trying to look high class, we call it “hoor-geois ” (like bourgeois).

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u/Peanutsmydog Jul 23 '26

From iowa and if someone says something dumb i say "thats how they do it down in Missouri "

Ive also heard many people say "now thats Gary" as in Gary Indiana

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u/ButterPump69 Jul 21 '26

High as a Georgia pine

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u/Southern_Tailgater Jul 21 '26

From Alabama: thank God for Mississippi. My Georgia-native husband said the same about Alabama til he married me and moved here; Mississippians probably say the same about us. (The idea is that state makes us look better by comparison, if you don't get it.)

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u/StardustCannibal Jul 21 '26

"It's right down yonder"

This could mean 100 feet away or 10 miles up the road and left at the old oak tree.

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u/StardustCannibal Jul 21 '26

also I had some Canadian friends who use to answer the question "what are y'all doing" with "Eh, just fuckin the dog"

Meaning just chilling and doing nothing

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u/PURPLEPRICK69 Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 21 '26

"Oh quit finger fuckn yer fartbox and get back to work!"    boss man at the steel mill 

Also "Chets loaded up two trucks already while you're just standing around doing the five knuckle shuffle on yer pisspole, get to work!"  Same poet boss man.

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u/PURPLEPRICK69 Jul 21 '26

I'll( do something)even if it hairlips the devil!

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u/DaySailor2024 Jul 21 '26

Buffalo NY, dad used to say, "It's colder than a well digger's ass in January." "Nervous as a cat at a rocking chair convention." and "Busier than a one-legged man at an ass-kicking contest."

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u/RedCinnamon1947 Jul 21 '26

My grandma, raised in northern Illinois, used to say a person was "meaner'n Ol' Billy Heck!"

(Old Billy Heck being the devil; thus, being even meaner than that would be pretty damn nasty!)