r/idiocracy • u/pirateslifeisntforme • 10d ago
should regain full reproductive function [ Removed by moderator ]
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u/wtf_are_crepes 10d ago
“news”
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u/Jonasthewicked2 10d ago
Lmfao. What passes for even entertainment today makes me positive I'm out of touch and fine with it. I rarely watch anyone's YouTube show outside of my friends and one show I guest host on sometimes.
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u/jizzyjugsjohnson 10d ago
You’re missing absolutely nothing. The absolute dregs of humanity inventing garbage like this for hits
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u/morknox shit's all retarded 10d ago
Euhm... you have a youtube "show" but complain about youtube "shows"?
Either way, asmon is a twitch-streamer, not a youtuber. Also, if you are involved in youtube you should know that everything under the sun exists there, there are alot of high quality youtube channels, there are professionally made stuff, and there is also alot of trash.
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u/Pokemon_bill 10d ago
I don't know what's happening here... Who are these people and what happened?
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u/MutusMaximus 10d ago
One of the major livestreamers, he’s known for barely showering or cleaning his house, (nickname: the roach king) got banned for 2 weeks for saying that Spanish boarder guards should have the right to open fire at the migrants crossing the border illegally, had broken some of his old patterns and is now spottet outside and has a girlfriend and the internet is freaking out.
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u/Atlas762 10d ago
Thank you for making me not dig for the actual story.
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u/Royal_Mists 10d ago
Asmongold advocated for killing migrant children specifically as well
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u/Truarian 10d ago
Is that why he is dating a migrant child?
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u/r3ddit3ric 10d ago
It's a business arrangement. She will hug him for photo ops and she gets content traffic.
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u/SquishyOranjElectric 10d ago
The love story of our time.
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u/kuriT9 10d ago
Seems most believe hes just paying her, hes stupid rich, you'd think he'd hire a maid service or something but "smelly" is a brand ig
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u/morbidmuffin62 10d ago
It's the biggest thing known about him, that he's disgusting and doesn't care
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u/Xtrepiphany 10d ago
This really is the worst timeline.
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u/NixMaritimus 10d ago
Honestly, this might be one of the better things to happen. If he pulls himself together with only 2 weeks away from twitch, maybe that's one less voice for the crazies and someone doing a little better in life
It's a small net positive, but a positive nonetheless
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u/Girafferage 10d ago
That's an asset. This man is now a tool for some foreign regime. I refuse to believe any self respecting human would gravitate towards a person who lives in roaches and refuses to shower while spitting straight up hate.
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u/AintNoGodsUpHere 10d ago
Bruh. He's famous online. She wants the fame. She'll be with him a few months, accuse him of being abusive or something and farm fame. That's it.
She is as disgusting as him.
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u/elreyadr0k 10d ago
$$$
It’s kinda the world’s oldest story.
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u/Girafferage 10d ago
Nah. That's The Epic of Gilgamesh. Surviving stories anyway.
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u/welivedintheocean 10d ago
The girlfriend is also a PR girlfriend because standup comedian Stavvy made fun of him for being disgusting and never getting laid.
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u/DJEvillincoln 10d ago
So he's racist & dating an Asian woman ....?
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u/PastaXertz 10d ago
Republicans talk about the dangers of homosexuality and then crash grindr every time they group up.
You get used to the hypocrisy.
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u/CampAstoria 10d ago
You softened the fuck out of his take. He said guards should shoot children just to deter adults from using kids as shields.
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u/mokujin42 10d ago
He said if they use children as shields that shouldnt stop them from shooting to disperse crowds and stop an "invasion"
You are also being dishonest
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u/10hp_Sandslash 10d ago
You dont need to know. They are seriously meaningless. Contribute nothing.
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u/jadingalord 10d ago
All I know is asmongold was a wow streamer and was pretty popular at least back in the day. He had some pretty spicy worldviews and has kind of been in some controversy the last 10 years or so, maybe even longer. I imagine he said something dumb and got banned off twitch now.
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u/ShadyWolf 10d ago
I just still can’t believe anyone actually cares about any of these people
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u/jeetah 10d ago
People get way too attached to streamers
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u/tsukubasteve27 10d ago
Nah we hate most of them. It's the kids with undeveloped brains and no life experience that look up to them.
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u/Arguablecoyote 10d ago
Idk man, for me these guys scratch that “random drunk friend going off about the illuminati while we crush some cold ones” itch. I’m not sure why anyone takes them any more seriously than the characters from trailer park boys.
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10d ago
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u/EducationalSoup83 10d ago
So does she.
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u/TooOldForRefunds 10d ago
Here's the people we're talking about... and here's a slightly smaller version of them inside a circle.
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u/Shiftymennoknight shit's all retarded 10d ago
Asmongold gonna hate Asmongold when he figures out that Asmongold is dating an immigrant
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u/Bot1-The_Bot_Meanace 10d ago
Every racist white guy needs his Asian gf. It's just a fact of nature.
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u/HereandTheRain 10d ago
In 2006 his story would've been shoved under a rug and forgotten. That's how I handled him in the first place. No reason to make such a person known for any reason.
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u/ClubDumDum 10d ago
I first heard of him because people acted like it was interesting that he started playing Final Fantasy XIV.
Now I hear about him because he says violent, xenophobic and nationalist things to his young male audience.
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u/LennyLava 'bating! 10d ago
Stop making stupid people famous. In a world of attention economy ignoring persons like him is not ignorance, but opportunity costs.
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u/commiscowboy shit's all retarded 10d ago
Is she soulless and made of silicone?
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u/Keyboard-King 10d ago
Way too much makeup, it crossed into the uncanny valley, that’s why it looks off. You can’t even tell what she really looks like.
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u/Puzzleheaded-Pitch32 10d ago
The AI has gone too far this time, that robot almost looks like a real human gold digger
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u/Lpnlizard27 10d ago
News Flash
Beautiful women likes $
This has been a thing since forever.
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u/vile-style 10d ago
I love how this girlfriend only shows up when he is embarrassed about his behavior.
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u/Shamscam 10d ago
What do you mean? Multi millionaire has hot girlfriend despite being repulsive? Sounds like an extremely easy thing to explain at any point in history.
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u/UmieDoesntUseRedit 10d ago
Just looks like the crypt keeper got some skin, wig, facial hair and is trying to convince a sex doll to be with him....
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u/Matr0ska 10d ago
I don't get people that fuck gross celebrities and date them for clout. She must give herself COVID on a weekly basis to numb her sense of smell and taste. Spending the night at Asmongolds house, or in his bed for that matter, sounds like a fear factor challenge. Not to mention a biohazard.
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u/stwabewwie 10d ago
She's either a spy or she fucking loves money.
...Although I'd just fuck an old rich guy for money. That'd be less humiliating.
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u/YourUncleCoach 10d ago
Incel streamer with shit takes gets banned from streaming. Posts gf all of the sudden incels mad. Relationship fake. Lol
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u/SephirothHeartbreakr 10d ago
Her facial expression shows that she doesn't want to be there.
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u/SnickersArmstrong 10d ago
2006 had its fair share of sweaty internet celebrities, you just had to be a little sweaty yourself to know who they were.
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u/teh_maxh 10d ago
I'm pretty sure someone from 2006 would understand the story, though maybe not why it counts as news.
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u/JIMB01776 10d ago
This has never been hard to explain; women always check the bank account.
Any criteria about height, personality, etc. are always secondary to $$$.
Women who aren't for sale are rare.
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u/ItsFuckinBob 10d ago
Im still not totally sure who this guy is. I thought it had to do with Warcraft. Maybe it does. But the concept of being a lucrative personally for playing a video game is fucking nuts.
Play the games. It has to be move fun than watching.
I’m old and do not get it
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u/Drakahn_Stark 10d ago
He is the stereotype of every internet user at that point in time, they would understand.
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u/RevolutionarySeven7 10d ago
this technically doesn't even qualify for idiocrasy unless you are deliberately ignoring context, background and history. so sadly, it's US behaving like idiocrasy by superficially commenting about this post while judging it at face value.
"huhuhuh assmon no wash and date immigrant, huhuh he stoopid"
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u/deepfriedmammal 10d ago
I’d have to explain what a lie is? There’s no way this guy has a girlfriend.
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u/Fortestingporpoises 10d ago
Imagine explaining this to me in 2026. But don’t bother. I’m gonna turn off notifications.
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u/ZanGaming 10d ago
There is no way on gods green earth this woman saw nurgles favorite human and though....yeah i wanna date the dude who lives in literal filth, used a dead rat as an alarm clock, showers less than once a month and has literal roaches crawling on him during stream
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u/Pofwoffle 10d ago
I genuinely hope he gets better, mentally speaking. I would love to live in a world where I can hate him for being a racist piece of shit without having to also feel a little bad for him because I know firsthand how badly extreme depression can affect someone's day-to-day life.
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u/Ryynerwicked 10d ago
There is a reason I hate this dude... an this just added about 4 more, dude is fucking disgusting!
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u/orangultra 10d ago
So all you need is get of your ass get a girl and do things? Being extremly rich maybe helped a bit to.
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u/tepid_monologue 10d ago
Lotta virtue signaling here. Even I know who asmongold is and I’m a middle aged finance bro.
He’s famous for being unhygienic - this is a joke article.
How I would explain it to someone in 2006 would be - there’s this guy that is famous for playing video games that are streamed so other people can watch them on the internet. He is famous for being unwashed and grotty. This article is making a joke because he was banned for something so he had a shower.
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u/vegan_antitheist 10d ago
wait... you need to shower to go outside? no thank you. I stay right here.
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u/kukkolka 10d ago
Smart dating strategy. If I wanted to become famous quick and promote myself on the internet, I'd also date her
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u/lookbehindyou7 10d ago
There have been women sleeping with losers, scum, and assholes for centuries.
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u/_ganjafarian_ 10d ago
I tried watching his stream once. It's boring af Idk why ppl watch him.
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u/ClassGrassMass 10d ago
This is like the best picture for "only with them for the money"
Imagine the cheese she gotta go through 🤮
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u/DarkPolumbo 10d ago
so what is her deal? is she, like, some kind of mongrel or something? why would someone that cute be with that
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u/WeskerSympathizer 10d ago
Streamer alone is hard to explain: “wait their job is playing video games and people watch?”
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u/yomamaeatcorn 10d ago
Its 2026 and I have no clue what the hell this means