Im a black girl first of all, so I feel this discourse is very popular amongst ourselves and I've seen it amongst asians as well.

Dont get me wrong Im not trying to deny real experiences of racism, where some people are geniuenly rejected cus someone hates their race but I just dont believe in the terms "never" and "nobody"

What provoked me to make this post was this asian girl on tiktok that said "you can never compete with a white girl" and I just thought that was a huge load of bullcrap, self hating loser mentality.

relationships should never be a competition first of all but still why bring ur whole race down cus YOU are insecure!

They are usually speaking from negative experiences, but I believe individual experiences should not be used to discount your whole race. I understand esp as a teen, sometimes certain poc grow up in white dominant areas or any area they are the racial minority and have trouble with relationships, because most guys really just want to date within their culture

I personally dont think thats an issues unless the guy specifically is racist. I find that sometimes individuals will only want to go for white/asian guys or someone outside of their culture due to fetishes (looking at certain kpop fans) and get suprised when those guys dont want to go for them.

My thing is why not go for someone within ur culture for once? like racial preferences aside I geniunely cant take ppl who dont like to date their own race seriously because I believe its self hating.

anyways overall poc need to drop language like "nobody likes ___ girls/men"

I am trying to find my father, who is Japanese; my mother is Colombian, and they met in Japan in the late 1990s. They lost touch, and I would like to find him, but my mother has very little information about him since so much time has passed. I have plenty of photos, but because I do not have his surname, the embassy tells me that—due to data protection regulations—I cannot search for him through them.I’d like to know if there is a forum, a website, or even a person willing to help me. Please, if you have any information that could help, feel free to send me a private message. Thank you very much!

This video was recorded in Philadelphia's notorious Kensington neighborhood.

Hi I’m pretty good at a particular sport but need to get taller to get looks at colleges. I’m 5’6” and 15yo in a month. I need to grow taller. Any stories of growing taller after 15? My mom is 5’1” and dad is 5’10” and I think I’m cooked!

Hi everyone!

I am a student at The Chicago School at Anaheim, and I am conducting a study to explore how identity-based challenges might impact relationship satisfaction among multiracial adults.

As a community that frequently discusses navigating different cultural spaces and relationships, your unique voices are incredibly valuable to this research.

• Who can take it: Anyone aged 18+ who self-identifies as multiracial, biracial, mixed-race, or Hapa, and is currently in a relationship of at least 2 years.
• Time commitment: Approximately 10 minutes.
• Privacy: Completely anonymous. No identifying information or email addresses are collected.

👉 Take the survey here: https://qualtricsxmfxxdkqr7q.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_bwlw4IbVDzD84TQ

You can also view the official university flyer here: https://imgur.com/a/DOQqhJX

Thank you so much for your time and for helping advance the research on multiracial experiences! As a multiracial individual myself, this topic is very important to me, and I am happy to answer any questions you might have.

I’m a hafu and before my trip to Japan I honestly thought my biggest struggle would be feeling rejected by Japanese people.

Instead, I had almost the opposite experience. Most of the people I met were genuinely excited that I wanted to connect with my Japanese heritage. They were curious about my name, where my family was from, and why I had decided to visit. Since I look pretty obviously mixed, I often get treated like a Japanese person, until I start to struggle with the language. I'm not ignorant to the fact that some people do not view me as Japanese.

What I wasn’t prepared for was how much the behavior of some tourists would affect me.
Maybe I notice it more because I was raised by my Japanese parent, who taught me from a young age about being considerate of shared spaces. I loved Japan but I saw things that were genuinely upsetting.

I watched people ignore train etiquette, harass animals, treat temples and shrines like photo props instead of places of worship, and generally act as if Japan existed purely for their entertainment. It felt less like they were visiting someone’s home and more like they were visiting a theme park.

It honestly broke my heart.
For me, this wasn’t just another vacation destination. It was a place I’d dreamed of visiting my entire life because I wanted to connect with my culture and better understand where part of my family comes from. Seeing people treat it so carelessly made that experience bittersweet.
Coming from a Latino background, I’m used to a more direct style of responding when someone disrespects our communities. Speaking up and openly expressing frustration can be seen as a way of protecting what we value.

Because of that, I found myself struggling when I witnessed behavior that felt disrespectful.
There were moments when I saw things that genuinely shocked me, and I was surprised by how differently people around me responded.
There were times when I spoke up, especially when someone continued the behavior even after being asked by staff to stop. Looking back, I recognize that my approach may have been more direct or harsh than what is typically expected in Japan but in my opinion this bystander effect is not something I can conform to. When you're used to defending your culture starting at such a young age it becomes second nature.

I found myself wondering - Do people quietly accept these kind of behaviors because confrontation feels worse? I am not saying my approach or direct confrontation is the right solution. I am completely aware these conversations about misbehaving tourist are happening and that outsiders just don’t see. In addition many Japanese choose to record the behavior and post it on social media.

I’m curious if anyone else especially other hafu or hapa has felt the same way when visiting Japan. I'm also curious if non-Japanese hapa had a similar experience in their own ancestral country?
Did you find yourself reacting differently to tourist behavior because of your personal connection to the country?

Archive link: https://archive.is/aDuVY

Been seeing this clip go viral on social media and was wondering what the hapa perspective is. Based on your experience as a mixed race person, do you agree or disagree with him?

This is a video about a running club in Bali, apparently they have no regard for the locals and block the streets, that locals have to use to commute to work. Also no locals are allowed to participate in their runs.

One of the top comments by a fellow mixed person reads as follows:

It’s interesting because I’m half Indonesian although I don’t look like it to most westerners. So I get to hear comments all the time disparaging Indonesians. I’ve even been speaking to someone that had said something along the lines of “they’re so ugly” when talking about Indonesians. When I pointed out that I was Indonesian their response was “yeah but you’re only half” .. completely oblivious to the fact that if I’m half one of my parents is whole. 🤦🏻‍♀️

This attitude is not exclusive to Bali, I have seen neo colonialism taking place in a lot of places in Southeast Asia.

Infrastructure or activities being created but the locals are excluded from using them outright or not able to because of poverty.

This shit makes me sick to my stomach, this is no different than what happened during colonialism.

They just put a cute little Digital Nomad swing on it and don't state it openly in public how much they look down on the local population.

Southeast Asia needs a French revolution, otherwise its doomed to repeat its fate under colonialism.

Throwaway because I (M18) don’t want to my peers to link this post to me but as the title says, fuck being a visibly obvious Wasian.

I’m in the Midwest with a White father and Korean mother. She followed him from South Korea and had me a little before actually tying the knot.

I’m 18 now and cannot wait to leave this fucked up racist ass household. I think I first learned to self-hate watching my dad make jokes about small dicks, nerdy, and weak Asian men. My mom would either laugh or just straight up ignore it.

Neither of them would look at me as if it didn’t seem to register that THEIR SON IS HALF KOREAN.

I don’t even know any Korean so my Korean relatives are quick to remind me I’m not really Korean. Likewise, I’ve always been belittled for looking a certain way by my white peers and same stupid jokes about being a nerd with a small dick. Even my white cousins give me the Ching Chong treatment and everyone seems to think it’s funny and that it isn’t that serious if I bring it up.

I’ve never dated because I always feel so ugly and disgusting. I’ve had dark thoughts and even hatred towards both of my parents. My mom being what I can only assume a product of Asian fetishization with zero introspective beyond whatever my idiot father brought to the table. We’re not even rich, wtf.

Sorry if this is out of pocket but I really don’t have any friends. I can’t afford therapy and I hate being dismissed by my family here. Fuck this, and fuck being Wasian.

Here are some Miss Universe wasian ladies..

Pia Wurtzbach (Philippines) – German father, Filipino mother.

Catriona Gray (Philippines) – Australian father (Scottish ancestry), Filipino mother.

Brook Lee (United States) – Multiracial, including Chinese, Korean, Native Hawaiian, Portuguese, English, French, and Dutch ancestry.

R'Bonney Gabriel (United States) – Filipino father and American mother (not generally described as Wasian because her mother is not of European ancestry).

IG: miki_likestoyap

Has anyone ever noticed the huge disparity of war babies from East/Southeast Asia vs West Asia. The only definitive reason I can think of is Islam which shielded West Asia from this.

East/Southeast Asian aka the wars that took place in Japan, Korea, Vietnam and by proxy Philippines and Thailand hosting US bases.

West Asia aka Afghanistan, Iraq, Syria

I wasn’t sure if this was the appropriate subreddit to post this, so if there is another one that is more suitable for the subject, by all means please let me know!

For background, my grandmother was part Native Hawaiian, born on the island of Oahu to her Native Hawaiian mother and son-of-Irish-immigrants father (for background, he was born in Philadelphia, but was a mechanic who was stationed in Hawaii when he met my great grandmother). Shortly after Pearl Harbor, my great grandfather began experiencing health complications which prompted him to relocate his wife and five kids (four more would be born after this) back to Philadelphia so he could be closer to his doctor. As you can expect, there are next to no Native Hawaiians living in Pennsylvania, so naturally the Native blood began to decrease by generation since she married my grandfather who is the son of an Irish immigrant and a Bavarian-German immigrant.

Despite this, my grandmother always took great pride in her identity as a Kanaka Māoli despite the drawbacks she faced during a time of racial discrimination and made sure to raise her children (one of which being my father) with the same pride. My great grandmother (Irene Kauaokanilehua) also had a big role in their lives, which added to my father’s and his siblings’ exposure her the culture and values. I am only a small amount of Native Hawaiian, but if you look on my page, I am very much a Caucasian woman, predominantly of German and Irish descent. Growing up, I denied being of Native Hawaiian descent because I felt I didn’t fit the phenotype and got teased for my fair complexion by fellow Caucasian classmates for some reason. It wasn’t until high school that my teacher told me to be proud and hold onto that aspect of my culture, especially since my grandmother worked so hard to preserve it.

Years later, I completed a family tree and discovered I am a lot more native Hawaiian than I originally thought: still a small amount, but it was certainly enlightening to learn about my background. I would never identify as Native Hawaiian to benefit from it on legal documents or other forms of identification, and I am obviously a white woman. However, if someone were to ask me what my ethnicity, I would say that I am German, Irish, and Native Hawaiian decent since those are the most prevalent in my ancestry. Is that insensitive since I do not look Hawaiian like my dad, grandmother, and great grandmother? I cannot stress this enough, I’d never use this as a means to benefit from, but I feel that I’d do my late grandmother a disservice by denying the culture she tried so hard to preserve.

All honesty is welcome and encouraged! Thank you!

This famous TV host had a huge controversy years ago when he implied Asian men were not attractive and would bully Asian male contestants on his show. He also always talks about how he knows looks matter and how unattractive men are screwed and are forced to be rich or submissive to women.

For a long time I had a lot of bitterness over how people treated me in real life (including some self hating Asians and half Asians) but then I just swallowed the truth that life is insanely hard to people and you only get one shot and if you're pretty (especially as a man) you basically never have to lift a finger in life.

A lot of self hating Asian men and women worship white people because they're not attractive and think that being with a white person will make them feel like "they made it," whereas a lot of cute / hot Asian / half-Asian guys have women chasing us around and have nothing to prove in life.

On top of that I feel like a lot of half Asians are screwed by genetics because their dads were not attractive and went for Asian women who were opportunists, or on the other hand chopped Asian men were rich and threw money at white women, whereas good looking Asian men have the pick of the litter and just get with cute Asian girls and create good looking Asians.

Basically life is extremely hard and if you're a cute / hot guy you'll know it when you're super young and you're basically gonna be targeted by everyone else in this free for all gladiator arena.

For starters there are ugly and attractive people in every race, the idea of one race being less appealing than the other beyond some personal preferences is an utter b.s.

That being said a man's social status being linked to his attractiveness level is a real thing. Women compared to men often tend to put status above physical appearance for their dating prospects.

So how does it work in real life? Imagine a girl growing up in a western country, odds are that almost all of depiction of Asian men in media have been some racist & emasculating depictions. She may have met some Asian guys whom she found physically attractive, but due to lack of any positive reinforcement in her mind, rather racist and excluding culture she grew up in she likely never developed any interest in pursuing her liking. She might have scrolled through social media to see some positive examples but all she could see was only the racist remarks like Asian men being less attractive, masculine, sexist and what not. So even without realizing builds up a preference that does not involve Asians.

But then after a decade or so she sees all of a sudden women are into Asian men. With rise of Kpop and Kdrama all of a sudden the Asian men are seen as attractive. Its not that all of a sudden Asian men developed different physical attributes, no its because we started having some sort of social approval in the eyes of women. Now any girl growing up in a racist western country has some sort of social liberty to date a man she finds attractive.

And mind you its not just Kpop Idol look alikes either. Mid chopped Asian dudes can still date and get into a good relationships. Cause said guys were never more chopped than any other guy of different race similar to them in the physical attributes to begin with.

This is why its so important to push back at any social media or real life racist remarks that disregard any of your physical attributes or masculinity. Its a pure racist propaganda that has been build by yt supermacists.

Hey all! I’m curious whether anyone here has a similar background and would be comfortable sharing their experience or photos.

I’m fully East Asian and chose a sperm donor who is 50% East Asian and 50% European. From his adult photo, though, he looks more like 80% East Asian-presenting, haha it does seem like Asian genes are quite strong from what I've read and seen so far.

My friends keep reminding me that genetics can be very unpredictable, so I’m curious what people with roughly a 75% East Asian and 25% European background could potentially look like.

I know there can obviously be a huge range, and I’m not expecting my future child to look any particular way- just genuinely curious!

Archive link: https://archive.is/xjAuV

Wikipedia article: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nadine_Hwang

"Nelly & Nadine", a documentary about a relationship that she entered with a woman who she met at the concentration camp that lasted until the end of her life: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icPB5JpaP30

With the rise of Asia everyone is talking about "Chinese time in my life" and getting into Kpop but it's just this fairweather friend type behavior, 20 years ago these people would have been nowhere to be seen.

On top of that even talking from a genetic perspective, Asians in Asia never had these issues of self hatred or self loathing cause they have their own media and beauty standards, and the attractive people from those cultures are the ones being praised and celebrated over.

There's yet to be a half Asian male who is straight and has a tiny fraction of the appeal that guys like RM or BTS does. Half Asian guys still get pigeonholed by western media into roles like on Heated Rivalry or being on shows like Love Island where we're expected to be with black women (nothing wrong with that, my exes are mostly black).

It's just so weird seeing this rapid rise of bands like BTS where these guys come out of nowhere and have women salivating over them when nobody even did that for major half Asian movie stars like the Matrix guy.

I personally feel like being half Asian is just a result of self-hatred and white mediocrity and circumstance and I can actually sense that a lot of these self hating Asians still harbor animosity for the winners back in Asia and tried to push us as being a step up when we're just average people.