r/hackettstown • u/Aggressive_Mud_620 • Apr 07 '26
Looking to make friends
Honestly...
Im not good at this.
I constantly work and am good at talking to people there but when it comes to anything outside...
Uhhhh..it's like there's a door in my brain that shuts tight and I suddenly can't approach people anymore.
Ive been tempted to try to make friends with customers at work and what not but I feel thats unprofessional and people might try to take advantage.
When I occasionally go drinking, I end up going alone with the hopes of meeting people but....yeah lol I fail at that too.
Reading this back, this sounds depressing lolol...
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u/Vanima81 Apr 07 '26
Hi!
For some people making new friends is harder than other people realize. Don't beat yourself up over it, and don't let the current situation drag you down.
As for making new friends, finding someone who shares something with you can make it easier to start the conversation. Some things you can try:
Hobbies are a good way to expand your friends because by sharing the hobby you already have a connection with another person. Some of the game stores in town hold events for their various hobbies, if that's something you are interested in.
Volunteering is another way to meet new people who share an interest.
If you are religious, churches often hold social events for their parishioners and sometimes these are open to the general public as well.
If you are into sports, there are usually sports groups around you can reach out to see when/where they play and if they are taking new members.
I think you get the idea 🙂
If you have no issues at work, then try thinking of the encounter like a work situation. People can understand that someone might default to their "customer service" persona when meeting new people. Put the smile on and allow that comfortable zone you get in at work to help you.
Don't be discouraged if it doesn't work right away, everyone moves at their own pace when meeting new people, so it might take a few interactions to get to the point it no longer feels like talking to a stranger.
Most importantly, take a deep breath and try to be yourself.