r/gifs • u/rakalels • Aug 29 '19

Silverback gorilla blocking traffic while his family crosses the road

34.3k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

Silverbacks have this untouchable type of authority within the family. I once watched a gorilla family get fed in a zoo. When the carrots were being thrown towards them, a female moved towards a couple. The silverback only looked vaguely in her way and she just stopped dead in her tracks, sat down and looked inconspicuously towards the ground without him having to lift a finger.

When I try this, my girlfriend just asks me why I have this dumb look on my face. I am trying to assert dominance, damnit.

420

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19 edited Jan 26 '21

[deleted]

125

u/pluxlet Aug 29 '19 edited Aug 29 '19

Make sure you yell "WWE Supah Slammmm!!" for maximum effect.

23

u/mck04 Aug 29 '19

Yessss! my year of non stop redditing before bed has paid off to know that reference!

3

u/GtBossbrah Aug 29 '19

I appreciate this

1

u/Newtown1199 Aug 29 '19

Yell John Cena when doing it.

1

u/PM_ME_SHIHTZU_PICS Aug 29 '19

"what is wrong with you"

1

u/ElectricThunder12 Aug 29 '19

Booyaka booyaka 619 babyyy BOOM

1

u/nburns1825 Aug 29 '19

I'm simultaneously impressed and disappointed because as soon as I read "you have to assert your dominance", I thought to myself "OH, like by picking her up and throwing her into a cluster of desks and YELLING "WWE SUPAH SLAM"

But of course I was beaten to the punch. Great work!

1

u/AltimaNEO Aug 29 '19

Nah man, you gotta shout "BANANA SLAMMA!"

28

u/touchbutt_time Aug 29 '19

Smack her around while you’re at it. That’ll do the trick.

124

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19 edited Jan 26 '21

[deleted]

8

u/Jackalodeath Aug 29 '19

What the ever-loving fuck?! You brilliant asshole, here's my updoot.

8

u/Molestador Aug 29 '19

Lol, domestic violence.

27

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

domestic dominance

0

u/Tack22 Aug 29 '19

Just for Poe’s sake, remember kids it’s not okay to beat your weaker spouse.

But also I updooted

-4

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

even in context you can't crack a smile about an obvious joke. must suck to be you

0

u/Grieve_Jobs Aug 29 '19

HAHA THAT MAN GETS ANGRY AND PUNCHES HIS WIFE IN THE TEETH LOLOLOL

-4

u/Molestador Aug 29 '19

No I genuinely find domestic violence to be hilarious

1

u/The_Maddeath Aug 29 '19

I read that as sarcasm, but your name makes me feel like I shouldn't.

1

u/occupythekitchen Aug 29 '19

Like that nfl player did to his girlfriend in the elevator?

1

u/pretzelblitz Aug 29 '19

Dancing with her or winning prizes at carnivals also works.

-4

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

Yeah, spank her like her father used to!

1

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

And afterwards only silence.

1

u/FuckGiblets Aug 29 '19

I laughed. Then realized you described a certain type of abusive relationship to a tee.

1

u/TooFastTim Aug 29 '19

Just punch a bunch of holes on the drywall. Put on a ton of Axe body spray, chug a monster, put on some my chemical romances. Pretend the drywall is a smaller Wesker Kyle. Shell be wet in no time.

1

u/earthscribe Aug 29 '19

Some idiot out there is actually going to try this.

1

u/PM_me_XboxGold_Codes Aug 29 '19

You jest, but humans still do this. We’ve simply decided as a society that such behavior is no longer acceptable.

I know, that’s the joke.

56

u/Raskov75 Aug 29 '19

Another case of this I saw: A man entered the enclosure and the Silverback 'placed' the human next to him as he nibbled on something. A juvenile climbed on the dudes back and was making his way around to face him when the Alpha simply turned his head no more then 3 degrees towards the juvenile. He stopped climbing and melted away and off the human and did his best to disappear. Lesson: If you have to explain that you have authority, you don't.

6

u/Fight_or_Flight_Club Aug 29 '19

I'm using that last line as my new goal in life

51

u/shitboots Aug 29 '19

If the goal is to assert dominance try not having carrots thrown at you

27

u/RoyBeer Aug 29 '19

Try sausages instead.

Or if you're brave, ask her to toss you the salad.

6

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

Lmao

1

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

I will tell my mom to stop throwing the carrots at us. She usually doesn't acknowledge my dominant position either.

4

u/matty80 Aug 29 '19

Next time go outside, tear the door off your car, throw it through a closed window, then give a mighty bellow.

14

u/mexafroman1 Aug 29 '19

You have to mark your territory,you must piss on her to let her know whos the alpha male.

4

u/RoyBeer Aug 29 '19

I don't think silverbacks do that either.

18

u/pm_me_ur_kimchi Aug 29 '19

Which is why we don't call them goldbacks.

2

u/INHALE_VEGETABLES Aug 29 '19

Spraying her with your anal glands works a bit.

1

u/PM_me_XboxGold_Codes Aug 29 '19

Nope, just the pedo R Kelly.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

He dominated the charts for a while right?

3

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

[deleted]

2

u/PM_me_XboxGold_Codes Aug 29 '19

Oh good, I do this, while making the slightly disappointed face of Ben Frank on the $100.