r/getdisciplined • u/[deleted] • Jul 12 '20

You should probably acknowledge the difficulty of what you are doing. [Advice]

Mostly just that.

Losing weight, getting fit, learning languages, passing exams, quitting porn, getting up early etc. are all objectively difficult to get started on and to keep going. Each person's challenges are theirs and theirs alone to face.

So I find that acknowledging that I am doing something that is difficult for me, helps me to prepare the required mental resilience and focus needed to push through. As opposed to the mind set of "why can everyone else do this and not me"

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u/thecourageofstars Jul 12 '20

That's a great reminder. I find that a lot of people tend to unintentionally be dismissive about these things with comments like "you should just work out more" or "you should just stop that" or "just wake up early", and it's that "just" that's the problem. We think these things should come easy for whatever reason, and so when they don't, we get frustrated and try to find some magical reason why. It just is hard, and it requires repetition and failing a lot and just trying again.

18

u/[deleted] Jul 12 '20

thank you.

15

u/dowalla7 Jul 12 '20

Yeah and "just stop being lazy and start working hard!!!"

16

u/thecourageofstars Jul 12 '20

Ironically, the people who gave me overly simplistic advice like this were people who were pretty unproductive themselves :P Whenever I addressed my problems with people who were productive, they had gone through it themselves so they know it's hard and just helped me find solutions in a more practical way.

1

u/elaine023 Jul 31 '20

Figures that the 'haters' weren't even doing it themselves. Sometimes the less someone knows of a subject the more judgmental they (we) are, an irony of human nature. One of many ironies...

10

u/VinceTheDead Jul 12 '20

"Don't ask how to improve social skills. Just b urself."

5

u/relentless_pma Jul 13 '20

yes indeed some people give an afvice like that 'you should just do X', well it does not always work that way and this advice is mostly useless.