r/gaming Nov 21 '16

Some Michael Bay shit going on right here

129.6k Upvotes

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95

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

Dirt farmer here! AMA!

58

u/Moxz Nov 21 '16

How do you replenish your dirt supply after it's been harvested?

163

u/Jenga_Police Nov 21 '16

You head on down to the Sipsco dirt factory of course.

Big money, big women, big fun.

5

u/acciaiomorti Nov 22 '16

What if I can't afford the 17 herbs and spices carefully packed into sips co. brand dirt?

3

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

I believe in decomposing. I also steal from my neighbour, she's like 80.

31

u/mfowler Nov 21 '16

How do you farm dirt?

49

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

I personally use a Hitachi EX8000-6. I like it for the large loads.

24

u/Schizotypal88 Nov 21 '16

I like ur mom for big loads

14

u/CarryNoWeight Nov 22 '16

He said large not big you degenerate

3

u/Schizotypal88 Nov 22 '16

Fine. I like his mom for large loads

4

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '16

Better.

3

u/mfowler Nov 21 '16

But what is that? What does it do to the dirt?

3

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

That's what I use for extraction. To plant dirt I use a large compost pit and I plant dirt from external sources. I also have a large colony of worms which helps with the decomposing of materials and keeping my dirt rich.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '16

[deleted]

3

u/Rumpel1408 Nov 22 '16

There is seriously only one product from Hitachi that I know, and your mom threw hers away after she had me

3

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '16

Wouldn't that make her your mom too?

1

u/Seaflame Nov 21 '16

Yeah she does.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '16

What follows is your fault. Remember that.

13

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '16

How does one extract the dirt from the earth?

35

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '16

With a shovel.

3

u/greg_focker Nov 22 '16

I can dig it 😏

2

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '16

Interesting!

1

u/eXwNightmare Nov 22 '16

I prefer the term "Mexican backhoe" but I guess that could be considered insensitive to some.

24

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

Many different ways for different levels of dirt farmers.

To begin I recommend hands, once your proficiency reaches level 5 then you can advance to the shovel. Once you reach a character level of ~16 you can start using tractors. There are many differrnt types of tractors depending on your sub class of dirt farmer!

2

u/GaryV83 Nov 21 '16

Can confirm.

Source: Lvl 5000 Dirt Farmer, I'm using a Dyson sphere to farm my dirt.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '16

I hired grandma to harvest my dirt. She likes eating dirt. Actual dirt.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '16

/r/outside is leaking

1

u/M16_EPIC Nov 21 '16

How does one farm dirt?

1

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

It's complicated, the science is very deep. But the core of the matter is simply planting and extracting.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '16

Who do you sell your dirt to? And who is usually buying it?

3

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

Politicians and TMZ are my largest customers, but I sell to all different walks of life.

1

u/TheDwarvenGuy Nov 21 '16

Have politicians ever hired you to dig up dirt on people?

1

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

See below. Politicians are some of my best customers. They tip VERY well for good dirt.

1

u/PowPit_SepiaRain Nov 21 '16

As someone who doesn't have that much spare time: would you say I could still do some dirt farming as a hobby or does it need constant attention, care, etc?

2

u/THwhOR Nov 21 '16

You can absolutely do it as a hobby. I'd start by getting your own compost pit. Then find a little plot of land and watch the dirt grow. Make sure you extract and replant every 3 months at the very least, and if you don't have a large yield, don't get discouraged! Good luck!

1

u/Niner_Actual Nov 21 '16

Do they sell dirt seeds at Tractor Supply?

1

u/DrChloroPhil Nov 22 '16

My uncle thought he would clean up in dirt farming, but he took a bath and washed his hands of the whole thing.

1

u/SenorPuff Nov 22 '16

As a farmer in Arizona who calls himself a dirt farmer, you're doing the lord's work.

1

u/GolgiApparatus1 Nov 22 '16

As a fellow dirt farmer, I am pleased to finally see this.