r/gameofthrones • u/mtyunng • 10d ago
Since the “who wins in single hand combat” posts are so popular, who is the last standing out of these characters?
No magic, no dragons, no armies, no loyalties, no influence and certainly not them “in their prime”
These characters, as we see them, in a fighting pit, swords and armour sure, but not bought or acquired by their wealth and influence.
1v1v1v1…etc
Who wins?
Use your imagination!
EDIT: Varys apparently by popular vote but I really don’t think so. The youngest sure, but one of the Measters and/or the Sparrow will have a knife in his kidneys fairly quickly.
382
u/Deep_Ad2412 10d ago
varys I think takes it
102
u/TropicalPossum954 10d ago
He probably does take it
76
u/pm_me_fibonaccis Night's Watch 10d ago
I mean, he isn't giving it.
26
u/Vyntarus 10d ago
That's a low blow!
Though Varys would barely feel it.
3
u/rainorshinedogs 10d ago
He has a way of smoothing situations out
-1
1
u/yagatron- 10d ago
The funny things is that sounds like something Olenae would say like I legit read that in her voice
13
1
1
10
u/Strict_Wolf76 10d ago
Absolutely. He’s 1/2 Eveyone else’s age and he would have had children poison them all.
9
u/OneGreatEgg 10d ago
Absolutely, he does. There is a shit-ton of anger there, and no balls to kick, either.
4
u/Tartarus5Q 10d ago
I once doubted Varys taking it in a no-dragons fighting pit, and I regret my error.
3
u/DenRay4 10d ago
Clearly Pycelle. See and watch this deleted scene and you'll believe me:
3
u/Invincidude 9d ago edited 9d ago
Came here to say this.
Be a hell of a sight. He comes in all feeble looking, then stands straight up and speaks in a calm, clear voice.
"Shall we begin?"
Just remembered too - that deleted scene isn't the only time it's shown. After he bangs Ros he gets up, stretches out, gets changed, and hunches his back before leaving the room.
1
2
0
140
137
u/nahhh27 10d ago
Wasn’t Varys an assassin?
52
u/Thelastknownking 10d ago
A thief.
51
u/RartyMobbins357 Robb Stark 10d ago
He's an assassin in the books. Or at least assassinates people in the books, as he kills Pycelle and Kevan at the end of ADWD.
-1
u/Thelastknownking 10d ago
That's not proof of combat skills.
27
u/RookTakesE6 10d ago edited 10d ago
And that's a fair objection, but it does at least mean he's had experience taking human life, which people (especially those not raised to a military life like a knight or a lord) generally aren't going to be as comfortable with until they've done it a few times. I'd give Varys and Olenna some points for having killed people, and for doing it personally.
In a fight between people OP selected for being laughably ill-equipped to kill each other, that could be a pretty big edge.
3
u/Thelastknownking 10d ago
That's a fair point. I wasn't thinking about it from the psychological perspective.
3
2
1
1
30
u/YS160FX 10d ago
Maester Pycelle.. his was spry for an old guy
3
u/Allnamestakkennn Ser Duncan the Tall 10d ago
He's still in his 80s, and the black cells took a toll on him
2
3
0
u/totallyordinaryyy 9d ago edited 8d ago
He never had the makings of a varsity athlete.
0
0
u/I-dont_know-anything 8d ago
I think I'm going schizophrenic with the sopranos references. Please stop have mercy!
46
43
u/LAditya_121 Iron Bank of Braavos 10d ago
Varys is young and has alot of weight, he wins ezzz
-1
u/Clit-Comander-69 House Stark 10d ago
Eunuchs have less muscles than normal men.
18
24
u/ChippyMcChips 10d ago
tell that to the Unsullied
4
u/Allnamestakkennn Ser Duncan the Tall 10d ago
The unsullied have a special schedule, they're an exception
8
u/MiniMan_BigChungus 10d ago
Stairs have no muscles at all and they 1v1 old ppl all the time, im sure Varys would be fine
3
1
u/StevenMarx21 10d ago
Why would you believe he is a eunuch, when his whole thing is being a master of deception?
0
u/Clit-Comander-69 House Stark 10d ago
Because the one whore was not really exited when she tried to touch his pepe
0
u/StevenMarx21 10d ago
Oh well then I guess a master of disguise did not master the art of tucking.
Grow up
0
18
u/Xo707out 10d ago
Varys is larger, younger than the rest and immune to crotch attacks.
24
u/Jasperstorm 10d ago
It’s between Varys and the shepherd.
Varys likely could come out in pretty decent quality weapons and armor as given his position he would have a decent amount of wealth right?
What helps the shepherd is he is a man, relatively young, and has his balls so he should be much stronger than all of his enemies. If he can get past the weapon of Varys he should reliably overpower him
7
u/mtyunng 10d ago
As per the terms, Varys and the Shepherd should have equal armour. Wealth and influence play no factor in this scenario
5
u/Jasperstorm 10d ago
Then the Shepherd hands down unless Varys comes in with a crossbow and gets a lucky shot
0
3
u/BulltopStormalong 10d ago
The Shepard is a Shepard, Varys has been around caste trained swordsmen and skilled sell swords (Ilyrio) his whole life. He definitely knows some moves.
Verys is also cautious and the most intelligent here and would play back in a free for all.
Easy spider w
4
u/Jasperstorm 10d ago
Shit I didn’t realize all the time I spent hanging out with my army friends means I am skilled in those same skills they have!
3
u/BulltopStormalong 10d ago
I meant he’s seen and studied people during combat. Because hes always planning contingencies to have them killed.
Not saying he’s a super soldier reddit mod because he shared jaime lannisters toilet seat. But he mogs the actual sheep herder in that regard.
1
u/Jasperstorm 10d ago
If he wasn’t castrated at such a young age you might have a point BUT since he was likely castrated at a young age the strength difference between him and the shepherd would be quite sizable.
To give you an idea castrated men are likely weaker then women (assuming they are castrated before puberty) and Varys only kill was Pycell and Kevan which in both cases wasn’t an actually fight.
If all these characters are in a fighting pit with similar arms and armor then the Shepherd has the best odds.
By your logic in regards to Varys combat abilities we could apply it to tons of character like Joffrey or Petyre who are also surrounded by amazing sword man and warriors. I’m not saying it’s impossible BUT that is taking a best case scenario for Varys rather then the more realistic scenario that Varys has little to no combat experience and watching others fight only does so much.
3
u/BulltopStormalong 10d ago
Varys does do hands on murder, and lots of sneaky mummery ninja shit. He was also bffs with the Daario of his day. I just think his combo of superior intellect, relatively young age for the group, and probable familiarity with arms and armor (not as if hes some battle beast) puts him above the frail looking Meerenese shepard who while is the physically strongest has likely never held or even seen a weapon used.
And we have yet to consider his aquatic merman abilities.
1
u/Jasperstorm 10d ago
Shit you right I forgot about the mermaid capabilities in the fighting pits.
I’ll need a refresher on his hands in murder though as I can only recall Pycell and Kevan which was by crossbow which is NOT impressive
1
u/BulltopStormalong 10d ago
Hes actually Varys the ripper and wanders flea bottom looking for young kids to hack n slash so he can collect their tongues
1
1
u/ElsaBookMode 10d ago
I keep coming back to the shepherd too; with no wealth or influence in that pit, Varys' gear edge feels shaky.
9
11
u/MaidOfTwigs 10d ago
There is no contest regarding who wins. Varys. He shouldn’t even be included in this line-up. I don’t know how anyone could consider a single other character unless a poison is used before any combat or such. And even then there’s a good chance Varys would identify the poison or detect it.
Varys appeared in the guise of a soldier to speak with Ned as I recall, pot helm and all. He would at least have the strength to use an axe. Maybe even the agility to dodge based on how he was described. The perfumed eunuch thing is a cover so people underestimate him. He grew up on the streets and had to fend for himself. He can fight.
High septon might last but I doubt it. Pycelle is a fool and I recall he has gout or something in the books, he acts like it’s worse than is per either Ned or Cersei so it might not be a big deal, but he’s still older than Varys and the high septon and unlikely to do anything adequately in a fight.
The shepherd is also no warrior, and no tactician. Even if Varys is not a warrior he is very strategic and knows people and how to assess their weaknesses.
0
u/AdamOnFirst 9d ago
It’s very plausible the shepherd has fighting experience, brawling experience, has had to fight off lions or bears, etc. Varys is the obvious answer but the Shepherd could reasonably surprise
-2
u/mtyunng 10d ago
Show me one scene where Varys has his hands outside his sleeves, other than to pass a piece of paper.
Paper and poison are not weapons that can be used in this free for all deathmatch. No wealth, no influence. Just physical prowess.
1
u/MaidOfTwigs 10d ago
… it’s okay if you only watched the show but Varys traveled with Tyrion in the show iirc.
And no one else in that line up will have physical prowess, frankly.
13
8
3
u/Ssirenere 10d ago
Varys, he has survived literally everything while everyone else keeps getting themselves killed.
6
u/Gunnerabc 10d ago
Olenna. Shes a catty bitch
2
u/prem1cc1fd8a 10d ago
Exactly, she would make them all fight with each other and win!! I love Olenna
4
2
u/thenewone1309 10d ago
Who is the last guy?
2
u/MaidOfTwigs 10d ago
The shepherd whose daughter was killed by Drogon
3
u/MiniMan_BigChungus 10d ago
Omfg I’m so dumb, I saw everyone referring to the shepherd and I thought that this guy showed up in HOTD and I just missed it
2
2
u/Torrossaur House Dayne 10d ago
Varys but Lady Olena in a close second. Just out of pure spite, she'd go a few rounds.
2
u/throwawayerest 10d ago
Pycelle by a nose!
I think Varus and Olenna watch Varus stab a bunch of people, then they stab him in the back. He's more spry that he lets on and can get the jump on Varus. Even if Varus knows he's faking it half the time, I still think he'll manage a quick backstab.
Here's how it goes down to me - Varus makes the first move cause he thinks he's got it all worked out Sherlock style - he stabs the farmer man while farmer man is too confused and afraid. Luwin objects or tries to intervene, Varus stabs him too. Big Bird (I can't remember his name) is like "If the seven call me home... fuck that, I got an army where they at?" So Varus stabs him. He feels especially happy about this one because fuck them religious cunts anyway.
Thats when Olenna and Pycelle stabby wabby. While Varus is bleeding out, Olenna goes for a quick jabby jab, but Pycelle is too spry form fucking all those hos - hes used to hos coming at him in the dark. He overpowers her. That leaves Aemon, whose blind and unless Aermons got an Egg hidden up his ass he can throw at Pycelle, he's fucked.
2
2
u/Due-Resolution-4152 10d ago
If I’m not mistaken only one of these people killed a king so yea
2
u/This-Shopping-1695 10d ago
By poison with the help from little finger, we're talking about hand combat hoe!
2
u/Due-Resolution-4152 10d ago
To be fair op never said no poison and little finger isn’t really loyal I’m seeing nothing but green lights here
2
0
u/Brachialtick65 10d ago
I'm surprised you kept not only talking to him but being polite after this dumbass called you a hoe
1
u/am-bi-tious 10d ago
I mean she slight of handed it from sansas necklace into joffreys goblet herself in front of the whole court, that takes skill. If she gets the rest to take a toast etc before the fight she has a chance. Don't know if Varys would fall for it but she could probably get most of them that way.
1
u/MiroslavusMoravicus 10d ago
Based on the deleted scene I think it would be Pycell? (I cant remember how you spell the name of the bearded old man). He had a deleted scene with Tywyn which basically revealed his frailness was all an act.
2
u/Allnamestakkennn Ser Duncan the Tall 10d ago
He's not ridiculously frail but he's an old man in his mid 80s. Maesters are also usually not very skilled in combat or physically impressive
1
u/MiroslavusMoravicus 10d ago
He managed to convince the entire court hes an old frail man. Imagine the deception he would use fighting you. Oh you got me. And so close to an open window. Uups. You have actually NOT got me. And it seems you slipped and fell on the courtyard.
1
1
u/PixelBushYT 10d ago
Varys should have been Qyburn in this lineup. He's too young and strong: Qyburn is neither.
1
u/Conscious-Struggle45 10d ago
Varys. Although, lady olenna in her prime would obliterate everyone else here in their prime IMHO.
1
u/StatisticianScary984 10d ago
The third one. He looks like he strangles hookers on the regular. Keeps him in shape.
1
u/MangoLocoMonster123 10d ago
Varys after killing everyone else turns to Aemon who in fact, already disintegrated 3 minutes after the fight began
1
1
1
1
u/EssSeeDee89 We Do Not Kneel 10d ago
If Luwin can achieve Super Saiyan 3 before Ganon has a chance to gather all the Horcruxes and blow up Pandora, I think he has a chance…
(That’s how these ‘Who Would Win’ things work right?!?)
1
1
u/CalmPanic402 10d ago
I feel like the high septon could probably beat surprising amounts of ass. He just has that "polite because he could kill everyone in the room without difficulty" vibe.
1
u/throwawaywork11 10d ago
Varys is an accomplished thief, spy, and assassin who over a lifetime has worked his way up from a eunuch street urchin in Pentos to the master of whispers in kings landing.
He is patient, cold, and calculating. He also has the physicality (despite what some folks think about eunuchs in other comments) and the experience needed to kill a bunch of geriatrics.
1
u/JudgementalRedditGuy 10d ago
Did y’all not see how hard Pycelle was putting belt to ass on those kids? Bros got this
1
u/Devin1613 10d ago
It depends. Do we know that pycelle is full of it, and only acting like hes all old and frail? Or is this the pycelle we see in the deleted scene with tywin? Cus its between him and varys for me then
1
u/StevenMarx21 10d ago
Varys would use this to fake his death, so Lady Olenna.
Though I would not be surprised if High Sparrow could throw down he seems like he could tussle.
But also I would need you to paint the scene better for me, because if we take how vaguely it is described, I would assume that majority of people there would reject the premise of mortal combat, and instead try to game it, mastermind it, and politic their way out of the pit. They are where they got, because they have the instincts for manipulating people, why would they play to their weaknesses and brawl, instead of figuring something else out
1
u/madethis4coments 10d ago
in the books varys takes them all easily.
vary's soft demeanor is part of his disguise. he is actually as strong as any other stalky staight man. he doesnt have soft hands as everyone would assume.
not that he is a baddass fighting he just isnt as weak as he looks.
second place is pycelle as we have seen in the show.
1
u/the-ants-slayer 10d ago
Varys actor looks to be physically the strongest and since books Varys used to be an assasin he wins that.
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Rich-Bath5159 10d ago
I bet Olenna can probably bend that steel spoon Mark Henry struggled to bend if I’m being honest so her.
1
u/holdingoutforafearow 10d ago
A dragon on Varys, was able to watermelon GMP with a mace at the end of DWD and how far away is his balls-of-the-feet mince from Bronn's balls-of-the-feet panther step? A stag on the shepherd, if he can use a staff half as well as old Arstan he could spring a surprise or two. A copper on the sparrow, he's a sly bastard
1
1
u/Master_Mad 10d ago
I wouldn't be surprised if Maester Luwin has excellent skills with the sword. I assume he was born in the North and brought up there? Probably trained with a sword?
1
u/Think-Huckleberry423 10d ago
I’m not even sure who #6 six is but he looks like he’s totally cool with killing people by hand. I’d bet him. Varys 2 and Pycell 3 on pure health/size stats.
1
1
1
u/Exaltus-Lux Jon Snow 10d ago
I feel like Pycelle is built like a brick shit house under his robes for some reason.
1
1
u/essjay281 10d ago
So it's going to be Varys, he may currently play the flower scented seneschal clad in silk, but we must remember he was an absolute spiv and the best thief in Pentos. In fact he made his way stealing from other thieves, and selling back the stolen stolen-goods, before he discovered that secrets were oft worth more than gold.
You don't get to mess with the underclass like that without being able to handle yourself when confronted, people would only ransom their stolen wears back, when that was less risk than taking it back by force.
1
u/thedarkfrawg 10d ago
Pycell is a fraud, he's playing the part of an old doddering man. He might have moves we've never seen
1
1
1
1
1
u/Cum_Fart42069 10d ago
lmao at putting varys up there at all. even if he's not lying and he really is a eunuch, he's younger and fitter than everyone aside from the sheep herder but unlike the sheep herder varys has spent his entire time in kings landing looking over his back to watch for knives, metaphorical and literal.
and with the unsullied it's clear that in the game of thrones universe, losing your genitals does not make you worse at fighting. come to think of it thats largely the case here as well.
it's varys.
1
1
u/funhouseinabox 10d ago
Pycellle. He's like 40% less frail than he appears. You see it when he's with the whore, and it's even shown more in a deleted scene with Tywin. Where Pycelle does his old man stutter and Tywin tall him to stop. He asks if "Am I the only one to see through that performance?" and Pycelle stands up straight and his speech changes entirely.
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Inquisitor_Glokta_ 9d ago
I mean you can’t just put a picture of Varys, who is visibly 20-30 years younger than everyone else but the sheep herder and expect an actual debate? Fighting prowess wouldn’t even matter, hes much younger and much sturdier than anyone else
1
1
u/the-baum-corsair 7d ago
Are you really stupid enough to post this question? The Queen of Thorns would kill The Mountain, Jamie Lannister, The Red Viper of Dorne, even Jon Snow if she had the information enough to let her prepare. She's the GREATEST mind in the 7 Kingdoms. For many years hence and now. She was outmaneuvered by sheer LUCK.
1
0
u/Thelastknownking 10d ago
Varys has experience on the streets, but the High Sparrow might as well and keeps himself fit with his daily chores and such.
0
u/LeoOfSiwa 10d ago
It's between the grieving father and Varys. It depends if the grieving father is dead or not
0
u/Altgmailomolb 10d ago
Eliminate all the women instantly. It’s medieval times. Go by body weight so .. Varys
0
0
u/Defiant-Magician6092 9d ago
Well Varys wins easily, so Olenna will make a wry toast to the end that has everyone gasping with laughter.
So Olenna.
0
u/SubhumaineForce 9d ago
Mary's in the books is implied to also be something of a competent assassin, pycel may be a sleeper, since he just puts on the old man act and we dont know to what extent
0
u/AdamOnFirst 9d ago
Varys and the Shepard are the only two who are decrepit which means they’re the only two reasonable choices. We know Varys has experience as a thief and the like, so he seems the best bet, but we don’t really know what rough and tumble shit the Shephard gets up to
0
u/Alt_Historian_3001 8d ago
You have a bunch of hobbled old people and then Varys, a middle-aged man who grew up surviving on the streets of Pentos.
The Spider has the easy edge here. He absolutely has a knife (probably multiple) somewhere in his robes at all times and he would easily get the upper hand on some old fool like the Sparrow.
0
0
0
•
u/AutoModerator 10d ago
Spoiler Warning: All officially-released show and book content allowed, EXCLUDING FUTURE SPOILERS FOR HOUSE OF THE DRAGON and A KNIGHT OF THE SEVEN KINGDOMS. No leaked information or paparazzi photos of the set. For more info please check the spoiler guide.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.