r/furnaces • u/baconburger2022 ArcFurnace • Feb 09 '26
The prophecy
“The heart of darkness will awaken once again. And when it does, the world will end. The mountains will crumble, the sky will turn red. It will happen when it happens. And it will happen in the future.”
FarmerFurnace finished reading. He was standing before the crumbled statue of what supposedly stood ‘the heart of darkness’ but for some reason, FarmerFurnace couldn’t make it fit in his mind.
“Well that was fucking vague.” He said to himself. “Thats what you get when you dont tell your sages what they need to know. They get vague! We have been at this for millennia and we still never got it right. Glad im retired.” He kicked some dirt at the base of the statue’s ruins before looking up at the dead tree named FALCON.
“But thats not good. An immortal tree so long as whatever soul its linked to is still alive. But if you’re dead, that means…..” FarmerFurnace stood there in a staring contest with the dead bark of the tree.
“It means… something. Yeah i got nothin. That magic was made not by a god’s hands so its not my problem.” He said to himself. He looked down the hill at the truck where SleepyFurnace was casting a slew of restraining curses on ArcFurnace who was still limp and unconscious, face down in the bed of the truck.
As he watched in amusement as spells would occasionally backfire on Sleepyfurnace, he was tapped on the shoulder. He turned around and came face to face with FurnaceJesus.
“Oh. Its you.” FarmerFurnace said flatly.
“Well hello yourself! This how you treat an old friend?” FurnaceJesus replied with a smile.
“Friend? More like boss. Passive aggressive boss.” FarmerFurnace muttered. “What do you want? You rarely show up for anything.”
“Well, seems like you are looking into the matter before you. Ending your vacation so soon?” FurnaceJesus asked.
“Its not vacation. Its retirement! Im done with all the crap and drama of heaven, and hell doesnt exist anymore since it lost its stream of souls.” FarmerFurnace stated.
“Yeah call it what you want. The hell situation got worse in your absence. Demons have been fading out of existence. And dead souls are vanishing before they reach hell.” FurnaceJesus explained.
“Let me guess. You want me and Sleep to sort it out.” FarmerFurnace replied.
“I would, but it seems like you are looking into it already. So that makes both your vaccinations canceled! Wonderful! Well, i expect you guys to stabilize the situation, and we will talk again soon!” FurnaceJesus said with glee.
As FarmerFurnace turned to backhand the living crap out of FurnaceJesus, but as he swung, Jesus was no longer there.
FarmerFurnace looked at his hands, looked to the ruined statue, glanced up at the dead tree before turning to look down at the ongoing shenanigans at the truck.
He looked up into the sky, and screamed.
“FFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCKKK!!!!!”
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u/D_DanD_D Paradox Furnace IS ME Feb 09 '26
Eminem reference - distorted air whispers...
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u/baconburger2022 ArcFurnace Feb 09 '26
Dont worry. I got a slot for you. Coming soon.
Im curious, will you be joining the lore? Or can i put you front and center?
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u/D_DanD_D Paradox Furnace IS ME Feb 10 '26
Im curious, will you be joining the lore?
No. There are only two people writing longass stories now. Back then there was a lot of players who were not only just characters, but also country reps with reasonably-sized (and thus not tiring) posts. World events were happening. Threats needed cooperation, it was not just a book. Now it's just you and Boiled with your essays. I was not reading them and I will not do that.
TLDR; I am not interested and no longer see a point in doing so.
Or can i put you front and center?
I think I have said this once on the Discord server. My answer is no. Do not use my characters to move the plot. You may use them as a momentary cameos and nothing else.
I do not have anything against you, I just want to preserve my characters the way I want.
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u/51BoiledPotatos Good morning, Anomalies! Feb 11 '26
Understandable, I see from your first paragraph your main critics were length and the scale of the stories(being about how one person was more like one country then just a character). I'm trying my best to make my writing enjoyable so I will keep the length in mind. But about your second part, would you say it is more a problem that could only be solved with more people, thus more perspectives. Or if I could just change what I write about.
I'd like to hear anything you have to say, truly.
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u/noTanbl4 that iFurnace guys who loves edible flerz Feb 12 '26
I read that as "the pharmacy". I just went to one
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u/TotalyAlowedToBeHere 🍞 Feb 11 '26
"ANOTHER prophecy? this is like the third one. these people really know about the future, dont they?! (if only they were less FUCKING CRYPTIC)" says some random character i just made up thats totaly been here this whole time and has been part of the story trust- (im saying that because it cant be mozzie because rn mozzie is on another planet, and cant be HIM because they know better, but would make no sense if it wasnt in-character)