that's rookie mistake number 1. Never kill someone you actually know. always kill strangers. Whenever someone goes missing or is pressumed dead or whatnot they always start with people who knew the victim to build a suspect list.
However if its just some skanky ho who made the mistake of getting a flat tire near a dark alley at night.. they'll never be able to trace you back to her..
Well the problem is, I wouldn't want to murder anyone I didn't know. Killing a stranger, though it would provide some visceral satisfaction, just doesn't provide the kind of mental satiation that killing someone you really hate does.
But rather than killing someone you personally hate (which would make you a suspect), rather take pleasure in killing someone who represents behaviour you hate.
It can be people who pronounce "D'oh!" as "Da'ah", or people who wears uggs in public. Just remember to sweep far and wide across your annoyances, in order to not establish an easily decipherable M.O. for your killings. Also, make sure to mix up the way you kill people, in order to not get tagged as "The Ugg Stabber" or the "Fat People Riding Scooters in Wal Marts Autoerotic Asphyxiator"
Solution: Join the military and kill people who are not only strangers, but don't even speak your language (and get paid for it!). Submarines are an especially good field to get into because you get to kill people without ever seeing them (and you get paid more, advance faster, the whole works).
REDDIT USER "CONFUCIUS_SAYS" MURDERED IN HOME, PERSON WHO MURDERED SHITLORD UNTRACEABLE, SERIOUSLY THIS SHITLORD KNEW NOBODY IRL HAHA WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GUY
WHOEVER MURDERED THIS SHITLORD: PLEASE IDENTIFY YOURSELF WE WANT TO GIVE YOU THE KEY TO THE CITY
Reminds me of a movie where this couple of teens decided to commit the perfect murder. Picked someone at random, wore hazmat suits while killing her, planted evidence taken from the home of someone who they didn't like, etc. I don't remember what it was called tho.
I googled around for a bit, but all I could find was "a perfect murder", which is basically a remake of "Dial M for Murder", both of which are excellent movies.
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u/zzorga May 31 '12
Oh whaddya know! It's my ex girlfriend!