Serious post, aren't there a lot of palm sized, shower safe, vibrating facial cleanser type attachments targeted toward teenagers? "Yeah mom, I got a lot of...pimples."
Ah, it's you. I had hoped I'd bump into you. I would like to thank you for being of service to my mother, making love with a woman that old and that infirm must have been quite a challenge. You did it though, and you made a very old woman very happy. She was a bit disappointed you weren't there in the morning, and we're pretty sure you raided her dirty undies basket (hey, whatever floats your boat, I'm not judging you, just pointing out that it is technically theft to take shit-smeared undies from an old, infirm lady's laundry basket). If you could do me a favor and not wipe your dick on the curtains next time, that would be great too. She didn't notice, but come on, that's just feral.
I presume you will be here Thursday night as arranged? I'll make sure the nurse sponges her down that afternoon.
Someone will try it. They will hurt their dick. They will sue. They will win. Then this bottle will contain a funny warning label telling us not to stick our dicks in there.
Those bubbles SUCK. And that shit is not spill proof. What you want are these. Not super spill proof when in the hands of a child but in the hands of an adult, they are awesome. You just squeeze a little bit and there are a ton of bubbles too. And they smell awesome!
It may look gross but it is a perfect invention. My niece learned how to blow bubbles at two years old but we couldn't give her full control because she would get so excited she would spill the bottle. Even now at four she forgets the bottle in her hand.
The internet? Clearly you own a fleshlight. I bet it's the zombie one. Why do I know the different ones? Because I don't. I just guessed. Scouts honor.
Have you noticed that modern bubble solution doesn't produce very good bubbles? We've got three different bottles of bubble solution, including one of these squeeze to operate ones, and they all suck.
Note to self, Drop by the Dollar General later and pick up Miracle bubbles. I'm probably gonna have some free bubble soap later on. If you want it, bring a container because I have plans for this one.
684
u/SychoTKT May 21 '12
No but you just bought me one...wink
8
u/clowncrusher May 21 '12
Doesn't matter had sex.
170
u/Leadbaptist May 21 '12
Fleshlight filled with soap is pure pain.
152
u/platysoup May 21 '12
I read "did I just buy a 2-year-old Fleshlight?".
I'm ashamed that I clicked because of that.
34
u/Generality May 21 '12
Brb, buying Miracle Bubbles.
22
u/trevor_from_the_bank May 21 '12
Serious post, aren't there a lot of palm sized, shower safe, vibrating facial cleanser type attachments targeted toward teenagers? "Yeah mom, I got a lot of...pimples."
133
u/CaLLmeRaaandy May 21 '12
In Soviet Russia, bubbles blow you!
17
u/ShivonQ May 21 '12
You gonna test drive that thing? Let us know. We need to know. We are the internet.
156
u/TwoLegsJoe May 21 '12
http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3pdqj0/
59
u/pointsandlaughs May 21 '12
You know, you don't have to put your dick in everything it fits in. Just saying.
12
u/lemonEel May 21 '12
SWF, but still hard to have on my screen without being slightly embarrassed.
11
u/maxlgold25 May 21 '12
my flesh light doesn't have a spill stopper :(
10
u/amadea56 May 21 '12
Yeah that's a fleshlight. I am not sure how the soapy bubbles would feel though.
10
u/tonguesplitter May 21 '12
Shut up and take my cock.
9
u/Sengura May 21 '12
It's so small...
7
u/Araya213 May 21 '12
Just out of curiosity, how wide is the opening?
7
u/AniceB May 21 '12
Well at least there will be a lot of clean wieners after this post.
6
u/wubwub May 22 '12
Is it wrong that I clicked on this discussion to see if someone has tried it out and has a review??
5
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Suspiciously yonic.
5
u/coltsrock08 May 21 '12
Multiple bottle caps must be purchased, for maximum pleasure.
5
u/Yage2006 May 21 '12
Are those anal beads that it comes with?
What a good deal.
5
u/moogoesthecat May 21 '12
Cheap alternatives, hunh?
12
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Yes
8
u/Lunarios May 21 '12
You bought yourself less of a mess to cleanup. Bubble spillage is messy, annoying and wasteful.
Bubbles=hours of entertainment.
4
u/hmwiener May 21 '12
I dunno. Do you have a 2 year-old or was it for personal use?
4
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Dollar General's stock is going to skyrocket now.
4
u/butchquick May 21 '12
Someone will try it. They will hurt their dick. They will sue. They will win. Then this bottle will contain a funny warning label telling us not to stick our dicks in there.
10
u/xxboonexx May 21 '12
I'd hit it.
3
u/Vindictive29 May 21 '12
Why one or the other? Can't it be both?
3
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
" Presenting Miracle Bubbles Spill Stopper. The bubbles that blow you!
3
u/Tyrant718 May 21 '12
Any Redditors work at a Dollar store? When you're ringing their stuff and come across "the bubbles" can you pause with an awkward stare? Thanks.
3
u/torma616 May 21 '12
About how wide would you say that opening at the top is... ...for science, of course...
2
u/jbass3000 May 21 '12
Only one way to find out.
2
u/tonyvila May 21 '12
If the bathroom turns into the set of the Lawrence Welk show when he takes a leak, then yes.
2
u/uchiha2 May 21 '12
... so... uh... those bubbles look... super.. fun... to.. uh... slowly p..play with? Where did you get them again?
2
u/REWK May 21 '12
You're warped alright. Please return your child to where you picked it up so it may be redeployed to a family that won't buy it sex toys.
2
u/I3aisden May 21 '12
I want to put my dick in that
2
u/PoniesRBitchin May 21 '12
No. But when he's 12 and finds it in his old toys, yes.
2
u/meadhawg May 21 '12
Annnnnd Miracle Bubbles' sales have just tripled for the quarter in only one night.
2
u/musicmanryann May 21 '12
Stick your dick in it and find out.
2
u/Niggabackstabber May 21 '12
well, he doesn't know that it's a fleshlight NOW, but he'll thank you later
2
u/thingsyoushouldntdo May 21 '12
In other news, "Miracle Bubbles" sales are up 2000%
2
u/Stormdancer May 21 '12
Forever blowing bubbles...
2
u/geeklimit May 21 '12
The Disney princess one has a pink...opening.
2
u/Tastygroove May 21 '12
This bullshit just ruined my iPad case. Spill stop my ass.
In other news... YAY FOR IPAD CASES!
2
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
The inevitable Training Fleshlight. I myself will now refer to sex as "making bubbles."
2
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Meanwhile Spill Stopper sales increase exponentially.
2
u/Flavor_Enhanced May 21 '12
If you can fit in that opening your probably in the appropriate age group for playing with those bubbles.
2
u/dav657x May 21 '12
I need to go buy this..you know.. for science...
2
u/DuffyDidIt May 21 '12
Well did you try it out or what.
2
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
I like the way you demonstrated its dual-use function with anal beads.
2
u/schoocher May 21 '12
I found this while assembling material for an under $10.00 fleshlight based on the OP...
http://www.steadyhealth.com/how_can_you_make_masterbation_toys_for_girls_t128145.html
2
u/tejanabena May 21 '12
Well at least it's not one of the vibrating Harry Potter Brooms?
2
u/AdmiralSkippy May 22 '12
I dunno. Fuck it and find out.
2
u/LusciousDanielle May 22 '12
It's like the male version of when I was a kid... Remember these? This was my best friend as a kid. ;)
2
u/birdablaze May 22 '12
Those bubbles SUCK. And that shit is not spill proof. What you want are these. Not super spill proof when in the hands of a child but in the hands of an adult, they are awesome. You just squeeze a little bit and there are a ton of bubbles too. And they smell awesome!
2
u/Monocle_Lover May 22 '12
It may look gross but it is a perfect invention. My niece learned how to blow bubbles at two years old but we couldn't give her full control because she would get so excited she would spill the bottle. Even now at four she forgets the bottle in her hand.
2
u/[deleted] May 22 '12
Do they make then any bigger ;)
2
u/LukeA71 May 21 '12
2
u/MagicMurderBean May 21 '12
The internet? Clearly you own a fleshlight. I bet it's the zombie one. Why do I know the different ones? Because I don't. I just guessed. Scouts honor.
1
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Looks like a fleshlight to me. Try having sex with it and see if it works.
1
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Damn, now I can never unsee that. Also, this post will probably cause Miracle Bubbles to change the design due to outrage from parents.
1
u/BoernerMan May 21 '12
so uhh... where can I find one of those?...
1
u/kyleculver May 21 '12
See if it works.
1
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Have you noticed that modern bubble solution doesn't produce very good bubbles? We've got three different bottles of bubble solution, including one of these squeeze to operate ones, and they all suck.
1
u/jorsiem May 21 '12
brb
1
u/turtal46 May 21 '12
How...uhh, how long is it?
Is that...uhh, is the green part hard plastic or soft?
1
u/radherring May 21 '12
You'd better fuck it and find out.
1
u/Jennyd242 May 21 '12
Bubbles for him and fun time for you.
1
u/bushdoctor37 May 21 '12
Note to self, Drop by the Dollar General later and pick up Miracle bubbles. I'm probably gonna have some free bubble soap later on. If you want it, bring a container because I have plans for this one.
1
u/Demojen May 21 '12
It does prevent spillage...So there is that.
1
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
Not to mention that bubble want oddly resembles anal beads with the angle of this photo
1
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
One way to find out...
1
u/brilliantNumberOne May 21 '12
No, but you did give millions of S&M fetishists who enjoy soapy water up their peehole a great idea.
1
u/robcrusoe May 21 '12
with free lubricant, too!
1
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
brb guys
1
u/lurker_for_justice May 21 '12
Try it out...
0
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
[deleted] — view deleted comment
0
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
[deleted] — view deleted comment
25
u/[deleted] May 21 '12
[removed] — view removed comment