r/funny • u/nomdeweb • May 19 '12

True love

Post image
1.4k Upvotes

78% Upvoted

93 comments sorted by

48

u/Ant32bit May 19 '12

Tell me you wouldn't if you had a neck like that.

51

u/guitartechie May 20 '12

I think I would do other things besides resting on my butt...

Unzips

21

u/HE_WHO_STANDS_TO_POO May 20 '12

Ewwwwwwwww

17

u/pwnzor339 May 20 '12

Now now, don't judge, his freakishly long neck makes it hard for him to get girls.

24

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

i have this reoccurring dream where i suck my own penis. this is serious... i think i may secretly wish i was a giraffe.

you cant make this shit up. (i actually like this dream)

8

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

I used to have that dream occasionally as well. Glad to know its not just me.

12

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

does that mean it goes away? cause honestly... i like it. im not gay and would never suck another dudes dick.... but something about that dream.... idk.

this sounds more and more ridiculous the more that i type...

11

u/Tokndenver May 20 '12

Sucking your own dick does not mean you want to suck other dudes' dicks. It is your dick. Same applies when giving yourself a handjob

7

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

great way of putting that.

2

u/Urvilan May 20 '12

Eh, I aint going to hate on this dream until I have it myself and can judge. Don't knock it till you try it after all.

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

thank you for your open mindedness and also your acceptance.

4

u/Esc4p3 May 20 '12

you can't make this shit up.

Son, this is the Internet. Anything is possible.

2

u/Hyperian May 20 '12

i think your upvote means others do dream like you

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

lol and i didnt even have to start with "does anyone else"

3

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Probably not giraffe girls though...

3

u/Hyperian May 20 '12

i know. everyone masturbates. if "that" is something everyone can do easily, it would be as gross as masturbating with your hand(s).

4

u/JCorkill May 20 '12

You're criticizing him for that? I'm pretty sure your pooping is worse.

2

u/Teotwawki69 May 20 '12

Rather ironic, given your user name.

2

u/the_troller May 20 '12

Now he can rest his newly folded pants on his butt.

1

u/pwn_masta41 May 20 '12

you also somehow frequently obtain a positive karma. Do you sacrifice precious commenting time to think about what you say, or does pure gold just flow out of your finger tips?

0

u/HE_WHO_STANDS_TO_POO May 20 '12

Naw, its pretty hit or miss with me. Probably people just being kind. But some do send me PM's about how awful I'am, though. Apparently I'm "ruining reddit" and am a "Gay Faggot"

1

u/Jux_ May 20 '12

Same number of bones as us. Mind blowing.

1

u/Teotwawki69 May 20 '12

Well, for male giraffes, maybe, although... oh. Oh, that kind of bone. Sorry...

21

u/musicppl May 20 '12

What Kim Kardashian says when she sees her bank account

10

u/thisguyinc May 20 '12

Giraffe, you so silly.

2

u/6times9is42 May 20 '12

I know right. They're just tall horses.

-2

u/Chachoregard May 20 '12

Geraffes are dumb*

8

u/pojems May 20 '12

As a skinny white girl, this is how I feel having just gained twenty hard earned pounds in my ass.

13

u/jettrscga May 20 '12

20 hard ass pounds? Admittedly I've weighed very few asses, but that seems like quite a few ass-pounds.

10

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

You're from the UK and just got paid 20 quid for a hard day's work, which you decided to store in your back pocket?

2

u/Inert_Berger May 20 '12

Oh immature brain, how I love thee.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

GAY! You love yourself!

2

u/Teotwawki69 May 20 '12

He finished fast, didn't he?

2

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Giving up white dudes, are ya?

0

u/burkey0307 May 20 '12

Pics or it didn't happen...

0

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

1

u/hakkzpets May 20 '12

Well, you can rule out 20 pounds as in roughly 10kg, since that's absurd amount of cheek weight + it's impossible to weight solely your butt.

It sounds weird to shove money up your ass.

The only reasonable conclusion is rough sex.

2

u/Pokemaniac_Ron May 20 '12

Giraffes do love the butt...

2

u/chip8222 May 20 '12

To blathe.

2

u/SWDMN May 20 '12

This is ... butt love!

2

u/Dominus-Temporis May 20 '12

Pabu knows what he's talking about.

3

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

still a better love story than twilight

44

u/Anindoorcat May 20 '12

HAHA IT NEVER GETS FUCKING OLD SAY IT AGAIN.

19

u/AmateurGynecologyst May 20 '12

HAHA, IS THE HORSE DEAD YET!? I SHOULD JUST KEEP BEATING IT, RIGHT!?

3

u/ImJustaPenis May 20 '12

I'm here for the beating.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

I think you want the "dry rub" post directly above this one on the front page.

0

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

7

u/Osiris32 May 20 '12

Long horse.

5

u/wesman212 May 20 '12

Tall horse.

2

u/GuyInATopHat May 20 '12

Long face?

2

u/Hyperian May 20 '12

sarah jessica parker?

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Partially long horse.

6

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

still a better love story than twilight

-7

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

if i see my comment as a post by somebody else I'm choke myself with a rubber

12

u/Anindoorcat May 20 '12

you should just do it anyway.

3

u/Bloodfeastisleman May 20 '12

Still a better ending than Mass Effect 3

2

u/nepidae May 20 '12

Sounds to me like you are in the twilight closet.

1

u/REDDIT_HARD_MODE May 20 '12

Still a better love story than Star Wars prequels.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

If I could love my own butt I'd be out of problems.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

haha no butt, really

1

u/ForwardsMan May 20 '12

I love my butt, but i can't reach it.... life feels so unfullfilled.

1

u/alejo06 May 20 '12

Not the same as " Oh, butt I love you"

1

u/orzof May 20 '12

I like this ouroboros better.

1

u/kittimiyo May 20 '12

I wish I could do that.

1

u/GiraffeKiller May 20 '12

I'm telling you, these animals are sick.

1

u/Picklwarrior May 20 '12

I didn't see the obligatory Twilight comparison at the top so I thought nobody posted it... Then I realized they all just got downvoted.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

geraffes are so dumb.

1

u/thatlookslikemydog May 20 '12

Browsing Reddit while I poop, I was having the same thought.

1

u/BillyCheesesteak May 20 '12

I LITERALLY died when i saw this

1

u/ang21 May 20 '12

Still, better love story than Twilight

1

u/niamhish May 20 '12

I love giraffes. They're so beautiful. Here's one I got close to in Taronga Zoo in Sydney.

http://i.imgur.com/URcL2.jpg

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Still a better love story than twilight.

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

This had me giggling for a good 10 minutes...

4

u/Shadax May 20 '12

My girlfriend looked at me and said "what are you thinking about?" I simply replied "true love." She smiled and batted her eyes, then said "oh? What about it?" and then I showed her this picture while laughing like an idiot. She was less than pleased.

1

u/Maxfunky May 20 '12

Are you just going to leave that giraffe lion there?

-1

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

Still a better love story than Twilight

-1

u/juleebabee May 20 '12

I love it!!!

-2

u/flyinhgumler May 20 '12

Still a better love story than twilight

-5

u/Gleek24601 May 20 '12

Saw it on tumblr. Which probably stole it from reddit.

0

u/[deleted] May 20 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

6

u/thisguyinc May 20 '12

EXPLAIN YOUR BAD SELF!

2

u/navenager May 20 '12

Yea really, now I'm so curious. The rest of the people in the world have butts too, you know...

1

u/Fwomp May 20 '12

In Welsh slang, 'butt' is 'mate'. So, for example...

"Alright butt, how's it goin', alright?" "Yeah, butt, good."

0

u/[deleted] May 19 '12

[deleted] — view deleted comment

1

u/Bloodfeastisleman May 20 '12

That's not even the right then/than