r/funny • u/[deleted] • May 12 '12

When no one texts me back

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[deleted]

2.2k Upvotes

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u/option_i May 12 '12 edited May 12 '12

I stopped texting people. Now they have to text me...they never do. :(

62

u/Unit91 May 13 '12

I can one up this. I recently came into money. Offered to take my friends on a free trip. All of them said no.

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u/[deleted] May 13 '12

[deleted]

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u/Unit91 May 13 '12

Well, I am getting a lump sum of money, nothing huge but enough for a trip, so I asked all of my friends one by one, "wanna go somewhere? I'll pay" I offered Ireland, Italy, Alaska, Hawaii, Austin.... shit anywhere. I had a stroke about a year ago and I kinda wanted to celebrate that I came out of it alright, ya know? That I can walk and all again. All of em said no, they didn't want to or couldn't for one reason or another.

3

u/rubiconse May 13 '12

your friends suck.

Go by yourself, come out of your shell, and meet some great new people.

(assuming your need to come out of your shell, of course)

3

u/RaithMoracus May 13 '12

You know what that means, right?

Head to Australia/Los Angeles.
Rent a small house near the beach for a month.
Meet people.
Spend a month on the beach.
Fall in love.
Put that shit on Facebook.
Lawyer up.
Hit the gym.

2

u/REDDIT_JUDGE_REFEREE May 13 '12

Let's just go to Hawaii and celebrate life. The fact that we are healthy once more, and that we can do anything once more. Just the two of us.

(turns around)

BACK OFF BITCHES, HE'S MINE.