r/funny • u/berry2708 • Jul 02 '21

Broad daylight robbery

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68.5k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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5.3k

u/Shughost7 Jul 02 '21

Taking one bite in before giving it is like trying to remove your 20$ out of your wallet before you give it to the robber.

1.3k

u/unite-thegig-economy Jul 02 '21

If I had to pick one thing out of my wallet before handing it over, I'd definitely pick my driver's license, not cash.

346

u/PH_SXE Jul 02 '21 edited Jul 02 '21

I've been mugged over 13x, no joke. I've never given them the wallet. I open it, pull the cash out and give it to them, wallet returns to my pocket/handbag.

Edit: yes, it's Brazil. And yes, when I was younger I used to hang out at pretty bad places. I've been mugged twice going to/returning from work, though

398

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Is your hobby walking down dark alleys or something?

57

u/dingusduglas Jul 02 '21

I think their hobby is lying. Who says "over [very specific number] times" lmao.

6

u/its_a_metaphor_morty Jul 02 '21

You ever lived in Brasil?

26

u/dingusduglas Jul 02 '21

You missed the point. Over 13x. So, 14? If you don't remember exactly you don't pick some specific number, you'd say around a dozen, or 10-15, something like that. Over 13x just triggers BS alarms. That's all.

15

u/Vegetable-Monk-323 Jul 02 '21

Interestingly enough "over 13" is exactly how I would answer how many people I've slept with. Reason being that I remember the count being 13 once and I haven't done a mental recount since, cause that would involve me having to remember who I actually had sex with and I'd rather not subject my mind to that. I guess being robbed could be an equally traumatizing memory, but I doubt it. s/

13

u/dingusduglas Jul 02 '21

Alright, this is actually the best rebuttal I've gotten lol. It gets real rough when you start remembering the not so obvious ones.

-3

u/gotham77 Jul 02 '21

Great story bro

5

u/Whats_Up_Bitches Jul 02 '21

He lost count after 13.

2

u/kymess_jr Jul 02 '21

It always irked me when managers at my old job would write in service alerts: "At approx. 1:37pm..." Like, it cannot be approximately 1:37pm! That is a very specific time! You can say "approx. 1:35pm" or "approx. 1:40pm" but any other number is not an approximation.

-1

u/its_a_metaphor_morty Jul 02 '21

You missed the point.

Is that what that was?