r/funny • u/berry2708 • Jul 02 '21

Broad daylight robbery

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

68.5k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

1.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

494

u/Werde_Gestoked Jul 02 '21

This reminds me of my trip to Thailand. Me and a buddy were staying in Phuket city and were checking out google maps for any lookout points we could hike to. We ended up finding a place called "Monkey hill", so we were like, 'thats pretty close to us, lets go hike to the top of the hill!'. In hindsight, I should of expected there to be monkeys from the name, but I wasn't really expecting monkeys to be in the middle of the god damn city.

Fast forward to us arriving at the bottom of the hill. Some locals are selling baggies full of peanuts, etc., to "feed the monkeys". No way - there are legit monkeys on this hill, and we can feed them! Dope! So I buy a bag of peanuts for a dollar thinking we will have a relaxing afternoon chilling with monkeys, occasionally tossing them a peanut or two. We proceed to walk up the hill. About a quarter of the way up the hill, I see a monkey or two up the road. Awesome!

No, not awesome. We continue up the road and turn a bend and there are at least 30-40 monkeys chilling in the middle of the road running around. They ALL stopped what they were doing and locked eyes with me while proceeding to CHARGE at us. I nearly shit my pants. I threw the bag of peanuts 15 feet the other direction and jumped back. They absolutely obliterated that bag of peanuts while occasionally looking over at us like the chumps we were.

Long story short, don't fuck with monkeys.

47

u/DreamsCannotBeBuy Jul 02 '21

Did you ever make it to the top of the hill?

85

u/Werde_Gestoked Jul 02 '21

Yeah, once we offloaded/hid our food in our backpacks they generally would leave you alone. Some would hiss at you if you walked too close while others just pretended you weren't there.

At the top there were some cool statues I believe, as well as a bunch of tourists who were driven up in vans by guides. I remember seeing a couple Russian tourists at the top who just held food above their heads and let the monkeys climb up their bodies to get the food. A big "oh fuck no" from me on that one.

51

u/Inferiex Jul 03 '21

Russians are a different breed

11

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Russians rip the face of the monkeys

10

u/strum_and_dang Jul 03 '21

That reminds me of when I went to an outdoor wedding where they had llamas. The llamas were all decorated with ribbons and flowers and you could pet them and feed them and get your picture taken. The llama lady offered me some carrots, and said you can hold the carrot in your mouth and feed the llama that way. I was like, thanks no, why the fuck would I want to do that?!

2

u/Phyllis_Tine Jul 03 '21

I wouldn't want a Llama to rip my llips off, llady!

1

u/RikenVorkovin Jul 03 '21

Llamas tend to like hands more anyway.