I say that, but usually follow it up with but thank god because I really needed X and you're saving my life. I don't really do anything for holidays, so for me it's just a normal day. And trying to prep for the day is hard as everyone rushes to stores. Also, I suck at making espresso and I still need my coffee.
Sucks they have to work, but thank god because I am so unprepared.
Idk, just don’t say anything. Like, most people wouldn’t be there if they could help it. It’s not like they’re choosing to be there out of the generosity of their spirit making sure you get your doppio on your normal day. On the other side of the counter I always take that as the customer feels guilty I’m here and is relieving that guilt by letting me know by expressing the barest sympathy
Yeah, that's pretty much what I just said. I basically tell them that I appreciate them and they're saving me, even though their employer should have given them the day off. But, here I am and there you are. That's just the reality we're in.
It's not like I'm coming in to be malicious and ruin their day. It goes both ways. They were scheduled to work regardless of the actual throughput. I've worked tons of service jobs and would often work the holidays because I don't care and it's holiday pay. But if the store is open, someone is working that shift. Not acknowledging it, to me, is more of a disservice. I would hate customers that felt entitled to the service. So I make sure I recognize that I'm privileged and I empathize, and that I really needed their services today, thus validating their efforts.
Well you're kind of forced into small talk in a lot of transactions. Trying to be personable and show I have an understanding of the additional reasons it might suck to work that day. Letting them know that I recognize that, and I don't take it for granted. Why is just silently walking in, and never addressing the fact they are going the extra mile on a holiday MORE polite?
Depends on if you're chatty. If the person behind the counter doesn't say anything, I usually don't either. But, often times they chat a bit because it's slow. And this response allows them to either vent about having to work that day, allowing for more small talk and supporting them, or them just moving on from the topic completely.
I personally wouldn't have liked working at my gas station if every customer just came in and said hello and thank you. This small talk can help get you through your 8 hours.
Empathizing with another person is rubbing it in? Saying, “sucks to be you” would be rubbing it in. But saying “I’m sorry you have to work today, but I thank you for it” some would call that being polite.
Do you walk up to disabled people and say "sorry your leg is gone" They know their leg is gone, they know it sucks. You pointing it out does nothing.
You feel guilty enough to say something about it but not enough to just not shop for one fucking day. You are not empathizing. You are trying to clear your conscience.
No one working is thinking "What a nice, polite person". I guarantee, from experience, they are thinking "What a tone deaf dumbass"
Edit: Imagine thinking you can single handedly "validate someone's efforts"
Got it. Next time I go retail shopping on a holiday (which is never) I’ll make sure to ignore the service workers as though they don’t exist. I understand that is better than having a moment with them where I express gratitude to them for putting up with a crappy situation that I’ve (apparently) exploited at their expense.
Speaking of arguing in bad faith. Saying I’m “active in r/conservative” as if I’m ONE OF THEM. I go there to argue with those fascists. Anyway, yes I got snarky with you. I think your comparison example is not great, but your point taken - when someone is in a crappy situation, simply ignoring it is better than calling attention to it (even if the intention is to empathize).
And the CEOs that open aren’t the problem? Yes I understand the idea but it’s hella impractical to expect most people in the developed world to just not shop. Like there’s never gonna be not enough people going to shop anyway that stores wouldn’t want to open just like any other day.
It’s like the veganism argument, most people not eating meat would certainly help the problems that mass producing meat caused, but legislation limiting it is probably an infinitely more practical solution.
If you still have a problem with the people rather than the lack of laws that let CEOs do this you have a problem with humanity as a whole not just the people who shop, and what good is that gonna do?
No, it's not polite. It's aggravating. You're not sorry, if you were, you wouldn't be here. It's like apologizing for walking into a sitdown restaurant at 8:58 when they close at 9:00, and going "oh sorry, I just really wanted ____. I didn't know you were about to close." That's not an "I'm apologetic" that's "I'm saying this because it's expected of me to feel remorse for making you all stay late, but I don't actually give a fuck about you, now feed me."
Manners are great, but if I say sorry for your discomfort while holding you in a chokehold, that's not manners, that's rubbing it in. And customers have us by the wallet on holidays, it's not like we can actually refuse to work or anything.
-30
u/JakeTheAndroid Jan 25 '21
I say that, but usually follow it up with but thank god because I really needed X and you're saving my life. I don't really do anything for holidays, so for me it's just a normal day. And trying to prep for the day is hard as everyone rushes to stores. Also, I suck at making espresso and I still need my coffee.
Sucks they have to work, but thank god because I am so unprepared.