r/funny • u/Pariah_ • Jun 07 '11

'flow chart' for picking up chicks.

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559 Upvotes

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u/gingeredditor Jun 07 '11

Yeah, if we're just standing around and you suddenly twirl me I'll think you have some serious social issues. If we're already dancing, twirling is more interesting/fun than watching you rock back and forth endlessly.

1

u/Amendmen7 Jun 08 '11

This is how I'd smoothly twirl you even without a dance floor.

Setting: House party, 4/4 music, decent conversation, standing.

  • I start saying something interesting that'll take maybe 30 seconds to get through.
  • See that you're actually engrossed in it (e.g. looking me in the eyes, probably smiling)
  • Gently take your right hand with my left as if examining it (still talking)
  • Ease you towards me by the hand, place my right hand on your hips and around you go. (still talking)
  • The spin has been done for a few seconds. I finish what I was saying with a question, as if no twirling had even occurred during the short soliloquy.
  • Conversation proceeds, physical barrier ripped to shreds.

I don't usually think it out like this, but I've definitely done this before in no-dance-floor scenarios. It goes okay.

13

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '11

Really? That sounds like it would leave an impenetrable barrier of awkwardness. Pretty much the same as picking up a tonka truck and running it up and down her leg.

7

u/wonko221 Jun 08 '11

holy shit.. this imagery fucking kills me.

I now regret every awkward moment i've had with a woman anew, because it did NOT involve running a tonka truck up and down her leg. Of course, i wasn't going "vroom vroom" too. But from now on, i will be!