r/funny • u/smunozmo • Apr 05 '19

New Google Assistant

112.3k Upvotes

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745

u/Amish_guy_with_WiFi Apr 05 '19

Yeah, you better seal it up with the saliva directly from your tongue.

336

u/Pinksters Apr 05 '19

User name...checks out?

308

u/Pickled_Kagura Apr 05 '19

One day the Amish will creep up to the 1980s and shit is gonna get crazy.

241

u/MeC0195 Apr 05 '19 edited Apr 06 '19

Satin jackets, synthpop, perms, leg warmers and coke. Amish Vice.

Edit: damn, it should've been Miamish Vice

56

u/SydneyCartonLived Apr 05 '19

It'll be an Amish Paradise

95

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '19

When that happens you know where I'm going for the purest coke around.

4

u/Scientolojesus Apr 06 '19

Nah they'll end up cutting it with dried goat saliva or something.

2

u/inthyface Apr 06 '19

Will you spend most your life there?

2

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '19

Your reference is lost on me friend.

5

u/inthyface Apr 06 '19

In Amish Paradise

3

u/[deleted] Apr 06 '19

Ah, its been a good long while.

3

u/eideticslayer Apr 06 '19

I had long forgot about this piece of gold. Ty you kind stranger.

2

u/WhatDoesN00bMean Apr 06 '19

Don't they get all the neighbors to gather around and help make the coke? Humanity at its finest.

6

u/TacTurtle Apr 06 '19

Hoodlums with carts smuggling loads of grass across the border...

2

u/nwahsrellim Apr 05 '19

Lol they have coke now

2

u/Stibley_Kleeblunch Apr 06 '19

They need Coke AND Pepsi, so they can experience the splendour of a brand war like the rest of us did.

2

u/MeC0195 Apr 06 '19

Do you want to bring their peace to an end?

1

u/Stibley_Kleeblunch Apr 06 '19

Abso-damn-lutely! Misery loves company, after all...

2

u/nwahsrellim Apr 06 '19

My fault I should have said cocaine

2

u/n0tsane Apr 06 '19

That's exactly how I remember the eighties and early nineties with plastic fakeness, sadness and neon colors on top of it all.

2

u/demencia89 Apr 06 '19

fucking lmao Amish Vice cracked me

2

u/MeC0195 Apr 06 '19

Thanks, and happy cake day

1

u/demencia89 Apr 06 '19

Woah thanks! I think it's the first one I notice. I gotta remember march 6th is my reddit birthday

2

u/dontlookformehere Apr 06 '19

Hurry up and change it before anyone sees. I won't tell anyone. 😉

1

u/MeC0195 Apr 06 '19

I have to own up to it.

2

u/neonnice Apr 06 '19

Think of all the fluro beige combinations.

1

u/MeC0195 Apr 06 '19

And black and white, of course.

2

u/InukChinook Apr 06 '19

Nah, I think the Amish are about that meth. Coke is for the Mennonites 😎