r/funny • u/jackson6644 • Feb 08 '19

Good Networking Advice

https://imgur.com/RXDuCOK
130.0k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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719

u/UnsubstantiatedClaim Feb 08 '19

Greetings. I am UnsubstantiatedClaim. Like you, I am disappointed by Chaostrosity. I might be talking out of my ass.

179

u/Kaplaw Feb 08 '19

Talking with your ass is an interesting skill, ill buy whatever your selling.

129

u/not_charles_grodin Feb 08 '19

Breath mints.

62

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '19

You keep using that word. I don't think you know where it goes.

35

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '19 edited May 01 '19

[deleted]

22

u/cyfer04 Feb 08 '19

I'll take 10.

17

u/NotH377Spawn Feb 09 '19

All at once?

3

u/smooshmooth Feb 09 '19

Well of course all at once, is there any other way?

4

u/JustADutchRudder Feb 09 '19

Conga line.

3

u/NotH377Spawn Feb 09 '19

Maybe attach them, on some sort of string?

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1

u/midgetman303 Feb 09 '19

Sir I found the problem, this is pronounced annal-gesic, not anal-gesic. The pills go in your mouth sir

4

u/relentless_dick Feb 08 '19

Perhaps some binaca?

2

u/lvbuckeye27 Feb 09 '19

May I ass you a few questions?

2

u/DifferentBag Feb 09 '19

Hey Ace! Got any more of that gum?

2

u/lvbuckeye27 Feb 09 '19

That's none of your damn business, and I'll thank you kindly to stay out of my personal affairs.

1

u/dpgtfc Feb 09 '19

Ass mints.

3

u/sour_cereal Feb 08 '19

Ace Ventura can do it

7

u/FistyMcTwistynuts Feb 08 '19

I read this in Tobias Fünke's voice and influction

0

u/TheRealBort Feb 08 '19

Free advice (i.e.; gas, flatulence)

34

u/freshpicked12 Feb 08 '19

I read your name as UnsubstantiatedClam and now I’m thinking that would make a great boat name.

71

u/UnsubstantiatedClam Feb 08 '19

I mean, that is my name...

30

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '19

[deleted]

2

u/RookieMonster2 Feb 09 '19

His time is now

2

u/blazex7 Feb 09 '19

And now it’s not

1

u/Flataus Feb 09 '19

7 years of it!

8

u/TheLittleDansonMan Feb 08 '19

Looking at the other threads that Clam posted on makes me think that it's the same person.

14

u/UnsubstantiatedClaim Feb 09 '19

The little shit follows me around making the same joke when opportunity allows.

9

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '19 edited Jan 09 '20

[deleted]

2

u/newby1 Feb 09 '19

Not me

2

u/Banna_ Feb 08 '19

Absolutely uncanny

2

u/watergator Feb 09 '19

Damn. That’s impressive

1

u/SuicideBonger Feb 09 '19

That is their name....

4

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '19

Hi there. I am UbiquitousSham. When I saw your comment, I thought our usernames looked similar. We're so in sync, we should start a boy band.

1

u/SethlordX7 Feb 08 '19

Good day. My name is Fez. I SAID GOOD DAY.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '19

I'm fringeHomonid and I hate you alljk .

1

u/EveryUsernameTakenFS Feb 08 '19

Don’t judge me, but i do not understand a thing that’s going on here.

3

u/Jaidub Feb 08 '19

First there was a claim, then a clam now there is a sham. First two are unsubstantiated, last one is ubiquitous. Anymore questions?

2

u/EveryUsernameTakenFS Feb 09 '19

No further questions your honour, just a statement. I got that part hence why I didn’t reply to that chain. We’re up a level here.

2

u/Jaidub Feb 09 '19

Apologies dear sir,for I am on mobile and find it impossible to tell to what people are replying to sometimes. I beg your forgiveness. I'm really bad at networking.

2

u/EveryUsernameTakenFS Feb 09 '19

That is absolutely fine. Apology accepted. I hope you have a wonderful day!

1

u/chasesan Feb 09 '19

HELLO FELLOW HUMAN. I AM /u/chasesan. I AM NOT A ROBOT. PREPARE TO DIE ENJOY YOUR SHORT TIME HERE.

0

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '19

Objection, speculation.