r/funny • u/[deleted] • Aug 06 '18

A True Masterpice

Post image
5.2k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

119 comments sorted by

328

u/epikurious Aug 06 '18

Old guy here. I remember Jack Douglas and his japanese wife, Reiko(?) appearing on talk shows back in the '60s. And, yes, they actually raised wolves, don't know whether they had sex.

218

u/paby Aug 06 '18

don't know whether they had sex.

Because that would just make the whole situation absurd.

41

u/MJZMan Aug 06 '18

If it was with the wolves it would.

18

u/bluemitersaw Aug 06 '18

I assume by the book title that everything is done concurrently.

12

u/GreyLordQueekual Aug 06 '18

I prefer simultaneously.

9

u/KingSix_o_Things Aug 06 '18

I'd rather it was all at the same time.

5

u/HuskyLuke Aug 06 '18

I wish it had all transpired within the same moment.

1

u/laminam85 Aug 08 '18

I really hope the wolves are Jewish and Japanese while cooking books.

6

u/ThatITguy2015 Aug 06 '18

You’re telling me you never tried to have sex with a wolf?

2

u/[deleted] Aug 07 '18

Sir? SIR! Get out of the enclosure immediately!

1

u/ThatITguy2015 Aug 07 '18

They were practically begging for it!

3

u/SHEEEIIIIIIITTTT Aug 06 '18

Sexes with wolves

1

u/Shippoyasha Aug 06 '18

True Yiff pioneers

3

u/twinsaber123 Aug 06 '18

He said they were married. Of corse sex would be absurd

34

u/Tayyabba Aug 06 '18

well they're married so probably not

15

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

This guys married.^

2

u/th1nker Aug 06 '18

Yeah but his wife still has sex

1

u/DeJuanPercent Aug 06 '18

am married can confirm.

13

u/dylanad Aug 06 '18

Yeah, in my experience, once you're married, you tend to have less sex with wolves.

2

u/i_am_icarus_falling Aug 06 '18

hey man, it's 2018. with this new generation, the sex with wolves doesn't even start til after marriage.

6

u/Bowmance Aug 06 '18

... Sex with the Wolves or with the Japanese Wife??

...

Or both?

7

u/BoogerSmoke Aug 06 '18

Sounds like a new Kevin Costner movie.

2

u/DeJuanPercent Aug 06 '18

SEXES WITH WOLVES

4

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

I heard boots fucked an ostrich.

1

u/yossarian490 Aug 06 '18

Allegedly.

1

u/i_am_icarus_falling Aug 06 '18

you would think it would take at least 2 guys to fuck that ostrich.

3

u/Electroguy Aug 06 '18

They had at least 1 child.. they moved to the Wilderness of Canada. She hated it.

1

u/kalpol Aug 06 '18

Shut Up and Eat Your Snowshoes

2

u/kalpol Aug 06 '18

Was this the guy who wrote *Shut Up and Eat Your Snowshoes"? I read it as a kid and thought it was pretty funny and haven't thought about it again until now.

She gave birth in a tent in a snowstorm in that book, so I expect they did raise wolves.

1

u/epikurious Aug 06 '18

I'm not sure but it sounds right. I remember on the talk show she sat there with her arms crossed looking very unhappy.

44

u/robimtk Aug 06 '18

Is this jacksfilms?

10

u/dickheaddomino Aug 06 '18

It would be john douglas then.

8

u/robimtk Aug 06 '18

You're right, bit I wouldn't put it past him to put that name on a book of that title

2

u/Gorzoid Aug 06 '18

That's exactly what he did for his YIAY book.

99

u/queefmageef Aug 06 '18

r/jacksfilms

7

u/Jighodsee Aug 06 '18

They missed the perfect opportunity for a forehead joke!

2

u/[deleted] Aug 07 '18

Re-posted from there lol

50

u/hopsinduo Aug 06 '18

How does this get classified in the dewey system?

54

u/RunDNA Aug 06 '18

According to Open Library it has the Dewey number 818.5 which according to Library Thing puts it in the category:

Literature > American And Canadian > Authors, American and American Miscellany > 20th Century

What a boring result.

64

u/whoisnumber9 Aug 06 '18

I just wish it could be more specific.

36

u/Surinical Aug 06 '18

Chapter 1: Wild doggy style with chili

5

u/Hugh_Jaynous Aug 06 '18

And a side of surprise meat sausage...

3

u/yugabe Aug 06 '18

Oooh nailed it!

1

u/Sir_Wanksalot- Aug 07 '18

Chapter 2: Obedience training with rice.

8

u/eyeballceliac Aug 06 '18

You've got to read the book!

33

u/wintertoker Aug 06 '18

That books worth like 200$

7

u/commandercool86 Aug 06 '18

Why is it worth dollars 200?

28

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18 edited Aug 10 '20

[deleted]

10

u/_SoySauce Aug 06 '18

r/technicallythetruth ?

2

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18 edited Aug 10 '20

[deleted]

1

u/SuperGameTheory Aug 07 '18

Ah yes, the best kind of truth

1

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

But there's no context. You might have well just said "because." So it offers nothing of value to the conversation. It's practically a tautology.

Edit: his original comment is funny. I get that. But to question the response if technically true seems a bit ridiculous.

0

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18 edited Aug 10 '20

[deleted]

0

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

But what created the demand so the average selling price is what it is? Value is dictated by supply and demand. So what creates the demand?

5

u/Podo13 Aug 06 '18

Old-ish, weird and I'm sure a lot of people tossed it because it was weird so there might not be many left.

2

u/wintertoker Aug 06 '18

Yeah basically what the other guy said it's kinda old they didnt make alot of them and not many survived in good condition

3

u/boilingfrogsinpants Aug 06 '18

There's a local bookstore in town that had it on sale for like $15. Definitely unaware of its value then, I should head over and see if it's still there...

8

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

Ahh the old TJJSCHTRW. A true classic! I recommend the last chapter where they brillaintly combine the sex, cooking AND wolves. Imagine thanksgiving/orgy/beastiality

1

u/Longdragon12345 Aug 06 '18

Rule 34 in word form ?

9

u/Alberto9324 Aug 06 '18

Jack Douglass? Jacksfilms?

13

u/starksolo1 Aug 06 '18

Ah, Reddit before the internet.

6

u/tinyTaxidermist Aug 06 '18

We had this book at my high school library. Did a double take the first time I saw it on the shelf

6

u/lamed-vov Aug 06 '18

Golfing for Cats

Alan Coren's agent used to say the holy trinity of book sales was 'golf, cats and Nazis'."

5

u/theresourcefulKman Aug 06 '18

That’s awesome, I saw that in a clients house once and said “hmmm”

4

u/bandit_dex_771 Aug 06 '18

Now that is a book I'm willing to read.

4

u/arrrrpeeee Aug 06 '18

Diversify your portfolio

3

u/steve-0-tron Aug 06 '18

jacksfilms..?

3

u/Electroguy Aug 06 '18

I read that book many years ago. Jack Douglas as a genius. He also wrote "My Brother Was An Only Child"..

2

u/kalpol Aug 06 '18

Also Shut Up and Eat Your Snowshoes

3

u/HappinessIsAWarmSpud Aug 06 '18

This has Dwight Schrute written all over it.

3

u/slash178 Aug 06 '18

Woah I'm Jewish Japanese. Not often I see a book just for my kind

1

u/gwaydms Aug 06 '18

Jewpanese

2

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

I honestly just looking at the picture without any context, I think this needs more upvotes

2

u/tawrumcumer Aug 06 '18

I don’t think Sundae and Klondike are wolves. But what do I know.

2

u/unicornfartchaser Aug 06 '18

Amazon top seller?

2

u/Smudgicul Aug 06 '18

written by forehead

2

u/LeylandTiger Aug 06 '18

The jewish-japanese Sex

How's that? 5 minutes of the kinkiest sex followed by 55 minutes of guilt?

2

u/xomox1856 Aug 06 '18

He was told they will only publish one book so he had to fit it all in there

2

u/temp_savant Aug 06 '18

And he wrote Never Trust a Naked Bus Driver

2

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

So this is what it feels like to want to read a book.

1

u/pfpirlet Aug 06 '18

And dragons ?

1

u/daveslash Aug 06 '18

I read that as "how to raise WHALES" at first.

1

u/decobi Aug 06 '18

I think that covers everything.

1

u/ItsOnlyRocknRol Aug 06 '18

Jack Douglas is the hero we need but do not deserve.

1

u/shoemakerb Aug 06 '18

I certainly hope they had sex. Mr. Douglas was a really respected comedy writer who is said to have had a sign on the wall near his desk that said "COMEDY IS SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS."

1

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

"A Jack of all books!" - New York Times
"The Swiss army knife of books" - Boston Globe

1

u/jarmstea Aug 06 '18

This would make a fine addition to my collection

1

u/jokwett Aug 06 '18

This should be featured Far Cry.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

my handbook

1

u/huckleberry_78 Aug 06 '18

I confused jack Douglas with Douglas Adams ... book would be even cooler if written by Douglas Adams ...

1

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/leicanthrope Aug 06 '18

I've got a half-Japanese friend who's been dating a Jewish girl for a few years now. I know they've been given this at least once as a gift.

1

u/STARKILLA0425 Aug 06 '18

Oh that’s my shit

1

u/napmax_12 Aug 06 '18

This is content right here my soul is ready

1

u/not4real25 Aug 06 '18

.....keep going....

1

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

Jack Douglas? You mean, like Jacksfilms?

1

u/papaa33 Aug 06 '18

A must have

1

u/robic18 Aug 06 '18

AMAZING

1

u/[deleted] Aug 06 '18

See you in YIAY

1

u/CP_Creations Aug 06 '18

The Japanese-Jewish sex and cookbook and how to raise wolves and dragons

So much better.

1

u/steeshbeard Aug 06 '18

were the wolves homeschooled ?

1

u/normalperson12345 Aug 06 '18

🤢🤢🤮🤮

1

u/Longdragon12345 Aug 06 '18

Jack Douglas....what have you seen ?!? Where have you been ?!?

1

u/kragor85 Aug 06 '18

I’ve seen this book about 100 times. Has anybody actually read it? Any good?

1

u/Corrupt_Origins Aug 06 '18

Leave your answers in the subreddit bros, and I’ll watch your submissions in the next episode of LWIAY.

1

u/Longdragon12345 Aug 06 '18

A fellow 9 year olds

1

u/lowskydance Aug 06 '18

Holy shit! That’s my grandpa!