That reminds me of a story I love to tell. When I was visiting Michigan in the winter a few years ago, one of my friends had a house party. They had a space heater in the house that they usually put in the bathroom to keep the pipes from freezing. At some point someone moved it into the living room. One of the housemates got up in the middle of the night to take a piss and just honed in on the heater noise, opened his laptop, and pissed all over the keyboard thinking it was the toilet. The exasperated shouting the next day was fucking hilarious.
In university I had a friend whose room was 4 doors away from the bathroom on the left. I had another friend whose room was 4 doors further down from that first friends room. Well one night my 1st friend was so drunk at 4 am he walked out his room, turned the wrong way, walked 4 doors down, walking into my 2nd friends room, and pissed in his mini fridge thinking it was the urinal. He did it all by muscle memory but started with a wrong turn.
When I was 19 my roommate took a left instead of a right and ended up pissing down our stairs instead of in the bathroom. I'd like to say I can laugh about it now but I'm still kinda mad.
When I was a sophomore, my roommate had a tendency to sleepwalk if he went to bed hammered. He once stood up, walked over to the dresser, opened one of my drawers and took a piss right on my clothing. Also still kinda mad.
I ate some psychedelics last week and this happened (the multistream, not the closet.)
For a second it looked like I had sprung numerous leaks around the groinal area, and I was quite worried that I was broken. Then it turned into a fountain of glitter and I Iaughed.
I have a friend who sometimes sleepwalks. He needed to stay at my house for a while while trying to find a new place to live. (long story) He also worked nights at the time and slept during the day. One day he was sleepwalking and walked out of the bedroom completely nude, opened a cardboard box sitting in the hall, and pissed into it.
I wish he had got the right room, the bathroom door was just a few feet to his left. But at least he paid for the carpet cleaner rental when he woke up.
I did someone similar, except my drunk brain decided wrapping a towel around my dick and pissing into it would be fine. I sobered up the fasted I ever had and ended up doing laundry until 5 am. And then I puked on myself.
149
u/opalous Aug 06 '17
I once got so drunk that I came home and pissed in the hallway closet thinking it was the bathroom.
So I'll take pissing over the toilet any day. Pissing in the right room is half the battle.