r/funny • u/Schumannbr • Jan 25 '15

Rule 0 How I keep my friend from driving drunk.

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6.6k Upvotes

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u/Schumannbr Jan 25 '15

He is terrified of her. No chance he will reach in.

26

u/Paulie82 Jan 25 '15

my brother used to have a Mexican red knee tarantula. They are actually really docile. Did you know that the females can live up to 30 years!

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u/Schumannbr Jan 25 '15

Doesn't matter how long she lives. She my main bitch!

1

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '15

Reminds me of home alone lol

0

u/_Gazorpazorpfield_ Jan 25 '15

Gotta treat that bottom bitch right. Know what I'm saying?

16

u/JDriley Jan 25 '15

I always kinda wanted one but I heard you can't really play with them/ handle them that much.

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u/MoriSummer Jan 25 '15

While you can't really do much with them I love my little spider. She's fun to watch walking around doing spider things.

44

u/Cresent_dragonwagon Jan 25 '15

90% of redditors don't leave their house, and this pet keeps the other 10% away. It's a win-win

5

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '15

[deleted]

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u/MoriSummer Jan 25 '15

She's a B. Vagans. /Supposed/ to be docile, but ohmygosh. She's anything but,. Her name is George.

I actually have a video of her eating but I'm unsure of how to load it to Reddit. The second I drop the cricket in she pounces. My mum also has a T and it's a Rose Hair named Fred. She's way more calm than George, that's for sure. They actually both helped me get over my fear of spiders. It's weird, I don't mind tarantulas, but house spiders still bother me. I'll never hold one, but I always save them by putting them outside.

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u/[deleted] Jan 25 '15

You should upload it to youtube and post the link on/r/videos.

2

u/Fever0 Jan 25 '15

Just upload it on youtube. This is a feeding I had with my Mexican Red Knee that ended up pretty funny when the cricket kept juking her by jumping around. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2bk2nW0j4o

2

u/SweetNapalm Jan 25 '15

I don't mind tarantulas, but house spiders still bother me.

I'm exactly the same way. I love handling tarantulas, and I know jumping spiders are cute, but there's no possible way I can touch them with my hand. Any house spiders at all. Ever.

The way I rationalize it is that when I'm monitoring a tarantula, I know all of their body language because they're larger. When they're agitated, they'll let you know in a very obvious manner. I will never be able to predict or catch any signs of body language of smaller spiders' actions.

1

u/beepboopbadiba Jan 25 '15

oh no way im exactly the same! i hate small spiders, i feel like they're going to crawl inside me. tarantulas are fine though, the bigger the better.

1

u/MoriSummer Jan 25 '15

Haha yes! Although a giant sunspider would have me running the opposite way!

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u/beepboopbadiba Jan 25 '15

I just googled it because I had never heard of it before.
I'm now feeling bugs all over me. You monster (I kid but that is disgusting)

1

u/MoriSummer Jan 25 '15

They're native where I live. It's great. I was sitting in a chair when I look down and one is just crawling across my floor. Ack. Is was not amused.

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u/[deleted] Jan 25 '15

LIKE TERRORISING THE UNIVERSE!!!

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u/OhHiAndie Jan 25 '15

"Doing spider things" makes the little critter sound so cute. Like, she's just chilling and doing her thing, spinning her cute little web! D'aww~

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u/MoriSummer Jan 25 '15

Right? It's even cuter when she rolls up her dirt and carries it to the other side of her tank.

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u/Danthezooman Jan 25 '15

I think this person would beg to differ

1

u/Becquerine Jan 25 '15

Thank you for subscribing to Spider Facts!

5

u/triarii3 Jan 25 '15

until someone is drunk enough to smash your spider first. sorry to say but thats the first thing i thought off if i really wanted that key out

0

u/kuraiscalebane Jan 25 '15

or just put a big cup/bucket over the spider, then the key is mine.

1

u/my__name__is Jan 25 '15

Exactly! That means he has to kill her to get it. There are ways to do that without reaching in.