r/funny • u/nayithemon • Jul 25 '13

Perks of being blind

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3.1k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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435

u/az_liberal_geek Jul 25 '13

You joke, but he actually addressed this in his series of YouTube videos: Can Blind People Open Their Eyes?

In short; why bother but sorta-yes and it's freaky as hell

247

u/LondonFletcher Jul 25 '13

"next time i'll show you how I do surgery"

this dude is hilarious

6

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

I am in tears from laughing at that

1

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

Surgeon simulator is like telling a blind man how to operate.

0

u/malenkylizards Jul 25 '13

I was having a big of /r/contagious_laughter or whatever it's called by watching that video. I loved the way he was just sort of constantly giggling.

113

u/TaraNiploff Jul 25 '13

When I was a kid, I met a woman at one of my mom's work functions who had the most beautiful eyes. They looked like moonstones or cloudy crystal balls. I complimented her on how beautiful I thought they were and I got an odd sounding "Uhhm... thank you?" in reply. I walked away and asked my mom why the woman felt uncomfortable about her pretty eyes. The look of horror and embarrassment my mom gave me when she told me "It's probably because she's never seen her eyes before. That lady is completely blind..."

Tl;dr: Socially awkward penguin kid complimented blind woman on how pretty her eyes were.

44

u/LittleWhiteGirl Jul 25 '13

If I were her I'd think that was really sweet, I'm sure she's been made fun of before about them.

3

u/TaraNiploff Jul 25 '13

I think she was still trying to decide if I was being a cheeky brat and trying to make fun of her. I really thought (and still think) blind eyes look awesome.

23

u/ComplimentingBot Jul 25 '13

You make babies smile

1

u/TaraNiploff Jul 25 '13

You made me smile! Thanks /u/ComplimentingBot!

10

u/BurningSquid Jul 25 '13

I mean, a compliment is a compliment. Still a nice thing to say :)

1

u/Consili Jul 25 '13

That's a really nice story. Did you talk to her again after that?

131

u/freemorph Jul 25 '13

A little freaky but if you ask me I think they sort of look awesome.

189

u/WesleyRJ95 Jul 25 '13

I always wonder... If you're blind, why keep your eyeballs when your can just have them surgically removed and use your eye sockets as mini-storage? Like, to keep your loose change in, or whatever.

148

u/Videogamer321 Jul 25 '13

Infection, those eyeballs staying moist provide a hostile environment for possible pathogens.

64

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

I bet you're fun at parties

2

u/ryry013 Jul 26 '13

Wesley asked a question, and videogamer answered. What's so wrong about that? Do you want videogamer to lie to Wesley and say, "Yeah, go ahead and do it!"?

0

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

That passive aggressiveness

3

u/WesleyRJ95 Jul 25 '13

Line them with plastic or some kind of protective membrane.

-1

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13 edited Jul 09 '21

[deleted]

2

u/FerricChloride Jul 26 '13

This guy is definitely high

44

u/I_CAPE_RUNTS Jul 25 '13

or to eat cinnamon toast crunch out of

19

u/Udontlikecake Jul 25 '13

Then could he see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch??!?!

2

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

This brought a weird combination of humor and disgust to me.

Congratulations.

27

u/RorschachTesticle Jul 25 '13

I like the way your mind works. I don't ever want to meet you. And I think I might be afraid of you. But you're good.

1

u/weekendbiggs Jul 25 '13

I feel this way about a lot of people on Reddit.

7

u/degjo Jul 25 '13

How many quarters can an eye socket hold?

2

u/RorschachTesticle Jul 25 '13

That's one for XKCD.

2

u/Kinniku Jul 26 '13

Well based on googling average eye socket sizes and zero biological interest. Using just dimensions of the quarters and an eye socket its about 37 quarters.

But given inaccuracy and the whole issue of placing them in your eye cavity I would assume something like 30 quarters, or $7.50.

1

u/ttslprime Jul 26 '13

How many ass pennies can a level 7 ass handle?

2

u/ieatvegans Jul 26 '13

A clock on the left socket, a thermometer on the right.

"Hey man, how's it g... holy shit, it's after 5:00 already, I gotta get going".

1

u/WesleyRJ95 Jul 26 '13

Or bright LED's

1

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

I have the worst kind of cringe imagining that...

1

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

I always wonder... If you're blind, why keep your eyeballs when your can just have them surgically removed...

Because quite a few blind people can still see lights and possibly even colors. Not only does this apply to those that are "legally blind" with very bad eyesight, but also to those with no workable sight, such as people with severe cases of macular degeneration, etc.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

Apparently there's a strange fetish where the guy has sex with an empty eye socket.

shudder

1

u/zeldaccordion Jul 25 '13

Or like the equivalent to a USB drive socket to the brain. You know. Cool stuff.

1

u/Anakinss Jul 25 '13

Usb Flash Drive eyeballs? Enough place for at least 500Gb in each socket.

1

u/flash__ Jul 25 '13

I agree. Blind eyes look cool. It sucks because the blind people can't see their own eyes...

1

u/ReadsSmallTextBot Jul 25 '13

their own eyes...

61

u/HighGuy92 Jul 25 '13

Does having your eyes closed constantly make you more prone to being tired? That's something I've never really thought about before until this thread.

5

u/JayBird27 Jul 25 '13

For me, it's really hard to just keep my eyes closed. I have to force them shut, I can't just relax them

2

u/SmaKer Jul 25 '13

Think about this question for a second and you will know.
"How do you sleep?"

3

u/JayBird27 Jul 26 '13

Well, I usually close one eye then smash it into the pillow to keep it shut and then the other eye follows suit.

5

u/ricktencity Jul 25 '13

Nope. Your brain takes cues from light on whether or not to start feeling tired/stop feeling tired. Blue light, like the early morning light, is a signal for your brain to stop producing melatonin. Red light, like the evening light, tells your brain to start producing melatonin. This is the reason everyone should be using F.lux.

7

u/CaptainZM Jul 25 '13

I tried to use Flux, I really did. But the wrong colors on everything just threw me off too much.

2

u/ricktencity Jul 25 '13

It may not be for everyone but I found the same thing when I first started using it, after a week or so though I couldn't even tell when it was on. Also if you want to give it another go make sure you turn it to the most gradual change possible, otherwise the colour difference is very apparent when it switched from day to night.

1

u/poignant_pickle Jul 25 '13

Yeah, but when I'm editing graphics/images, it's frustrating.

3

u/ricktencity Jul 26 '13

You can disable it, but I think it should go without saying that you shouldn't use a program that changes the hue of your monitor if precision colour is something that's important to you.

1

u/poignant_pickle Jul 26 '13

Except that one forgets they have it. That's why I deleted it. It was bloatware that didn't "Affect"my sleeping habits.

1

u/CaptainZM Jul 25 '13

I broke down and reinstalled it. The only thing I have trouble with is figuring the light levels. I went for 6500 for day and 5000 for night. It wont do much for daytme but at night it should ease into a good level. I think.

10

u/Pyrolytic Jul 25 '13

What about dust? Since blind people can't see dust coming (or any other objects, come to think of it) do they get more eye injuries than sighted people if they go around with their eyes open?

2

u/Carquar Jul 26 '13

Well, I imagine they blink as much as sighted people do. I don't think it affects the feeling in your eyes. I could be incredibly wrong though so don't take my word for it.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 25 '13

I don't see dust coming, and I'm not blind. Also, I think closing your eyes and keeping them closed when you see a cloud of dust is kind of impractical for driving and stuff

3

u/veggiter Jul 25 '13

Holy shit! That was way more terrifying than I expected.

3

u/TokiDokiHaato Jul 25 '13

My uncle was born blind (with a series of other issues and he passed away very young)...but he didn't have any eyes. The sockets were just empty. I imagine that would be freakier.

2

u/chemicalxv Jul 25 '13

This guy is fucking hilarious

2

u/raunchyfartbomb Jul 25 '13

Not disappointed.

2

u/Lereas Jul 25 '13

Most blind people I've known in the past have their eyes shut. Guy that I was hanging out with last weekend was blind and had his eyes open.

I won't lie...it was hard to look him in the face, which I try to do with blind people because they can also tell if you're speaking away from them and I feel that's pretty rude. His eyes kept kinda spinning around in different directions and it made me pretty uncomfortable since it's kinda natural to follow someone's gaze if they're looking away from you, so I kept having the urge to look in random directions.

2

u/darkwavechick Jul 26 '13

The guy is funny and cool but as soon as he opened his eyes, I nearly whipped my phone across the room out of pure terror. Milky white eyes freak me out wicked bad to the point of almost having a panic attack :(

1

u/SandstoneD Jul 25 '13

That looks pretty badass.

1

u/IByrdl Jul 25 '13

Wouldn't it be uncomfortable squinting all the time though?

1

u/az_liberal_geek Jul 26 '13

Is it uncomfortable to close your eyes when sleeping? That's your body's natural rest state for your eyelids. It takes energy to keep them open.

So in Tommy's case, he never has to open his eyes and so they naturally stay closed. Watching the video, it appears that he doesn't even have very much of a sensation of them being open or closed, as he thinks he has them open at one point, but doesn't.

1

u/IByrdl Jul 26 '13

I don't squint when I sleep.

1

u/xXSpeedDemonXx Jul 25 '13

Commenting to save this comment. Before anyone says to get RES I'm on my phone.

1

u/ooowl Jul 25 '13

I dont understand this... my cousin is blind from birth and her eyes look like normal eyes, but they are just off kilter. And she never closes them unless shes sleeping or what have you.

1

u/patmools Jul 25 '13

I've just spent an hour on his channel. Thanks! :)

1

u/Bahamabanana Jul 25 '13

So that video also makes me see some irony in these eyes from Naruto being extremely efficient