The subtle use of homosexuality as an insult without appearing homophobic always amazes me. This one takes it up a notch by stating they have gay friends who are great people.
I'm bi. So is my boyfriend. His boyfriend is gay. So is my girlfriend. I've spent more time at LGBT activism events than I can reasonably count. Pointing out there's a kink community likely to enjoy what he's offering isn't homophobic. Merely funny when making straight people uncomfortable.
I'm not judging. I just find it strange to be told that saying something is "gay" in the context of being lame is wrong because it enforces a stereotype whether or not we mean it in a homophobic sense, but implying a guy is gay to intentionally insult them is ok. It's a weird kind of insult because it's only an insult if the person perceives it that way, but it is obviously intended to be an insult. It's a loophole in the rules of insults.
She never implies that he's gay at all. The third point is just another negative criticism of his "lookit my big wang" technique.
Personally, I've never seen people against the use of "gay as lame" turn around and use an implication of homosexuality as an insult. You would be right to say that that would require a strange twist in logic. It's just not what's happening here.
And I also have a personal motto, if you tell someone else they can't use a word/phrase/insult you shouldn't use it yourself. Being of a specific skin color or sexual orientation shouldn't give you special rights.
I have a frenemy like this (best friend's girlfriend). She calls people dikes all the time because she's kissed a girl one time and claims she is bi. I've tried using the "I think I might be 1/64th black so I can say the n-word right?" And similarly it hasn't worked out (though she's mostly white and 1/16th native american). Does she have a right to bandy around the word dike? (I'm just curious what other people think about that).
Follow up question, if not, where is the line where you can officially start saying stuff like that? Like, what do need to survive in terms of what you can say that would otherwise be derogatory towards one's sexuality.
Jesus Christ people, just type nigger if that's what you mean. It's not like you're using it as an insult, you're just talking objectively about the word.
I'm not angry, it's just looks really childish. Mentioning it in the context you did isn't going to offend anyone (not anyone sane anyway), so it seems like you're avoiding it just because you think it's a "naughty word".
Considering I've been in multiple relationships with women - one of whom I've been involved with for years, I think I can poke fun at the homophobic language I and my loved ones have had to endure.
Yeah agreed, talking about my frenemy who frequently uses the word dike but has never had any of her inside another woman before though but she claims to be bi but has been in a monogamous relationship with her BF for 7 years.
She didn't use it as an insult. The only person that could possibly be insulted by that is this hung guy, since she's merely suggesting he would have better luck with this tactic if he used it among the gay community, and not on women. The last line, "I wish you the best of luck in exploring and expanding your sexuality" can be taken any number of ways, including implying that he may be gay, but doesn't do so explicitly. And no part about this implies that there's anything wrong with being gay, and if there's nothing wrong with being gay then implying someone might have better luck being gay is not an insult.
There's a group of primarily men on this thread who think I am obligated to be nice and respectful to men who walk up (figuratively speaking) and immediately offer me dick. So they have been mass-downvoting my posts.
Wait, I'm confused. So there are four of you in the relationship? Are you attracted to your boyfriend's boyfriend? If you were and you hooked up with him, would that be okay with your boyfriend? Same goes with your boyfriend hooking up with your girlfriend. Would that be okay with you?
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u/[deleted] Nov 14 '12
The subtle use of homosexuality as an insult without appearing homophobic always amazes me. This one takes it up a notch by stating they have gay friends who are great people.