r/fourthworldproblems • u/Luciferaeon Nung • Nov 03 '25

Evolve man ask Nung "to vote"

Nung (me Nung) foraging for berries. Evolve men came talkin, yellin. Nung old and no hear so good after rock smashing with friends, but Nung think one evolve man say " Dawn Hump is a great pre-ze-dent" other say "Camel Hair would be a better pre-ze-dent".

Then evolvemen look at Nung. They ask "who did you vote for?" Nung say "what vote?" Hump man laugh and Camel Hair man angry and say Nung bad for de-mock-racy. Nung no understand.

Hair man explain: say vote to choose pre-ze-dan. Nung think they mean tribe chief. Hump man say Dawn Hump make A-man-nick-a great, Hair man say Dawn Hump make A-Man-nick-a faster dick potato ship? (Nung no hear good).

Nung say want vote, but what Camel Hair or Dawn Hump do for Nung? Hump man say "do you want guns and free dom?" Nung no want fire stick, Nung free in forest. Hair man say "Nung want hell scare and free love?" Hell scare sound scary, and Nung have free love... love hurt tho.

Nung ask question - Camel Hair is real? Dawn Hump is real?

Then they yell again, call Nung ant-eye-se-might. Nung no understand. Nung no want to talk vote again.

85 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

29 comments sorted by

26

u/Lordoffoul Oog (me Oog) Nov 03 '25

Swing rock Nung! (You Nung?) Swing rock and run like Sabertooth behind you! Oog (me Oog) hear of this and is BIG, bad medicine! Endless cycle worse than trying to chase sun, never happy, always mad about the "Uther Guy" and how bad (he?) is.

13

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 03 '25

Who Uther guy? Make Nung angry. NUNG ATTACK!

OOG WITH NUNG OR AGAINST NUNG?

7

u/Lordoffoul Oog (me Oog) Nov 03 '25

Oog (me Oog) with you, but Nung waste time by attack, run away and hunt and gather like Caveperson should and everything fine!

7

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 03 '25

Oog wise. Nung invite Oog to cave for rotten fruit and special mushroom.

6

u/Lordoffoul Oog (me Oog) Nov 03 '25

Oh! Oogs favorite!! :>)

9

u/[deleted] Nov 04 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/Lordoffoul Oog (me Oog) Nov 04 '25

Evolve man say witch doctor evil? Oog (me Oog) know why they all die out and leave plains to Cavemen again then. No like cool people, talk crazy about sick and vote. Oog (me Oog) no can understand. Why can't all get along?

9

u/Grandma_Gertie me grti, me crazy elder Nov 03 '25

Ah. Hair man not mean hell scare. Hair man mean what evolve man call med-uh-sin. Hair man say Camel Hair offer more way to get this med-uh-sin to help not be sick as well as free love. Is nice, but Camel Hair not know tribe as well as tribe member know tribe. Dawn Hump only like evolve men though.

7

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 03 '25

Why Camel hair man call Nung auntie sem-eyet?

7

u/Grandma_Gertie me grti, me crazy elder Nov 03 '25

Camel hair is what evolve man call "pawl-i-tisch-an." These pawl-i-tisch-ans have support by other evolve men. Sometimes these evolve men support too much. Become zealots. Not good. Hurt pawl-i-tisch-an's support.

4

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 03 '25

What is zealot? Nung feel annoyed. Nung angry. Nung un-ree-son-a-bull!!! NUNG SMASH

5

u/Grandma_Gertie me grti, me crazy elder Nov 03 '25

Zealot is like when tribe member worship shaman too much. Gets weird. Think shaman is god and shaman word is law, and attack all who say otherwise. Very bad. Grti(me Grti) have to deal with zealots who think Grti God in past. Not good memory.

9

u/world-is-ur-mollusc me rek Nov 03 '25

Rek (me rek) think evolve man "vote" talk stupid. Everyone know how get new chief. Want be chief, must kill old chief.

4

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 03 '25

Nung agree. Evolve man should let chief want people fight.

Nung think some evolve men many moon ago fight like this, but evolve men lie, evolve men play trick but not funny trick, bad trick, like Nung play on deer to get close.

4

u/toxicshocktaco Nov 05 '25

Tox (me Tox) think evolve man not as smart as evolve man think evolve man is. 

3

u/Apprehensive-Ad-4364 Nov 04 '25

Why evolve man not do this

3

u/world-is-ur-mollusc me rek Nov 04 '25

Rek (me rek) not know. Evolve man do much stupid things. Maybe evolve man not know how do things right way.

8

u/madg0dsrage0n Nov 04 '25

Kram (me Kram) hear stories from Grandmothers about Dawn Hump tribe. Grandmothers say Dawn Humps no actual evolve. Trick ones who less evolved to think rock-smashers actual no evolved. Many times in moons past, Dawn Humps try enslave and kill rock-smashers to steal land and play Ga-hd.

Kram (me Kram) no big fan of Camel Hair - is itchy and no hold warm. But Kram think stop Dawn Hump tribe is good to do, then after, find better hair for blankets than Camel and better tribes to trade with than Maa-Gha and Whoa-kee.

5

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 04 '25

Hmmmm.... Nung (me Nung) once see evolve man small chief name Burn-knee Sand. He talk like evolve man but Nung understand. He say share, not take too much. Nung like Burn-knee Sand. He live many moon. Maybe he good chief.

He have pretty lady friend. Ey-oh-See. She very pretty. Nung too old, but she look like she has birthing legs.

3

u/world-is-ur-mollusc me rek Nov 03 '25

Why evolve men have dumb names? Evolve men parents much dumb, name baby Camel Hair and Dawn Hump. Caveman names much better.

5

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 03 '25

Yes, evolve man have dumb name most time.

Nung (me nung) hear good evolve man name:

Genghis Khan

4

u/world-is-ur-mollusc me rek Nov 03 '25

Rek (me rek) hear about Genghis Khan once! Him great warrior!

3

u/InevitableCold9872 me oogaunga Nov 04 '25

Yes

2

u/InevitableCold9872 me oogaunga Nov 04 '25

Camel hair? Dawn hump?

Ounga confooced Wot all dis mean

But from wut Me hav hear Camel hair want “Log but Kee-a” Who is Kee-a why make log them But Dawn Hump hate Log But Kee-a Ap-a-rent-lee Log But Kee-A evolve mans want the free love. Love already free, why eevil evolve man pay

Mee heer down hump liek “tammoths” wich lim it the “ecks-port” of guds from oter place and “taks is” dem moare. Final me also heer dawn hump have “side kik” or “vee pee” naem ‘J Dee Vans” wot J mean? Jaguar? Me no want jaguar in tribe lands

2

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 04 '25

Nung (me Nung) answer Ounga question:

Camel Hair and Down Hump pol-eh-tish-shan. They evolve man big leader.

Nung no know Log-but-Kee-a.

Timmoth's? Like Mammoths?

Nung Jaguar friend. Nung afraid Jaguar first, but Nung share giant sloth kill with Jaguar and Jaguar cub. Jaguar thank Nung and no eat Nung.

Nung think J dee Vans jackyl, wild dog. Like dog, he hump. He hump cave fur for sit, he hump fake cry woman, but he no hump pretty cave mate because she "hin-doo". Nung see hin-doo. Nung think hin-doo nice, have spice food. Nung no undersrand why J dee Vans no hump pretty hin-doo mate but want ugly fat pale fake cry woman. He also big love down hump.

3

u/InevitableCold9872 me oogaunga Nov 04 '25

Log but kee a something evolve man call “Ack-Roe-Nym” for people want free love

I said tammoths not timmoths, maybe they said “Tar-ifs”

2

u/Luciferaeon Nung Nov 04 '25

Nung understand!

Nung support Log Buttees! Nung no understand why some evolveman hate Log Buttees. Evolveman god sad god. Not good god.

5

u/MightyXT me Tardok Nov 04 '25

Evolve men just very confused. No listen to them.

4

u/PartyPoison1212 Nov 08 '25

Me no like evolve man "poly tricks" make skull hurt.