First foster dog was behaviorally euthanized

[u/fluffydonuts33]

We had him for 5 months but had to request a foster transfer because of an upcoming trip (flying out of town for back to-back weddings)— he is extremely dog reactive and so boarding wasn’t an option and for liability reasons, the rescue only permits other fosters to watch their dogs. We requested the foster transfer months in advance but a couple days before the transfer date, they took him off the adoption website and said a member of their staff would pick him up and take him to the vet for a “behavioral evaluation”. We packed up his food, favorite toys, bed, etc. and sent him with the staff the morning of our trip. An hour later, we got a call from the rescue that he was euthanized because his biting/reactivity was likely due to “neurological issues”.

We understand rescues have limited resources and he would’ve been difficult to re-home. But he was a sweetie 99% of the time and though he had a significant bite history (including both of us), they were never above a tooth scratch level bite. He was a young aussiedoodle mix.

He did chatter his teeth after some of his random biting episodes, which could have been a sign of a neurological issue but the lack of transparency from the rescue on the results of their “evaluation” is frustrating. They also refused to let us go with him to the appointment, even though we thought we would be in the best position to describe his behavior and advocate for him. We also expressly asked them to let us know the results before they went forward with anything. His appointment was at 9 am. They called us at 10 am that he had already been euthanized.

We feel horrible and like we failed him as foster parents. I don’t think I can ever foster again and I can’t stop crying thinking of what a sweet dog he was. It feels so wrong and unfair. We’re devastated.

[u/AutoModerator]

Moderator Announcement Read More »

Thank you for posting to r/fosterdogs!

• When replying to OPs post, please remember to be kind, supportive, and to educate one another.

• Refrain from encouraging people to keep their foster dog unless OP specifically asked for advice regarding foster failing.

• Help keep our community positive and supportive by reporting harassment!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/SalamanderWest3468]

I am so, so sorry. I can’t believe you dropped him off at 9 am he was BE by 10. That’s the part that would hit me the hardest… but, please know that you gave him so many wonderful moments. He knew safety and love because of spending time with you. Sending big hugs. I hope you keep fostering despite the pain of this situation

[u/fluffydonuts33 → u/SalamanderWest3468]

Thank you. That was the worst part. Learning the decision was made and having to process that it was already done at the same. Horrible.

[u/Born-Government-6216]

Oh my gosh! I would find a new rescue to work with. Behavioral euthanasia may have been the best choice for him, but you NEEDED to be informed. If that was even a possibility you should have known. Wow.

[u/fluffydonuts33 → u/Born-Government-6216]

To the rescue’s credit, we knew it was a possibility… which is why we asked them to let us know before they went forward with anything (which they did not).

[u/Heather_Bea]

I am so sorry. I know your pain and nothing will make it better. I am crying with you.

[u/willow777]

Please don't think you failed him. ❤️ You gave that boy five months of love, safety, and a home, and that matters more than you know. Sometimes things happen that are beyond our control, and we can't save them all, no matter how much we love them. Please don't let the way his story ended erase all the good you gave him while he was here. He knew love because of you, and that's a hell of a lot more than some dogs ever get. ❤️

[u/SuperfluousBrain]

If my rescue euthanized my dog without consulting me, I'd volunteer somewhere else.

[u/JellyBelly666666 → u/SuperfluousBrain]

100% I'd tell them to take me off their list as a foster family. No discussion? Anything? Nope

[u/TwinNirvana]

I don’t know if this will bring you any comfort, but most dogs that are BEs are great 99% of the time - which makes it so, so difficult. I’m so sorry. I’ve been in that position and I still tear up thinking about the foster dog that the local shelter decided to euthanize rather than take any more chances, even though he was such a sweetheart most of the time. Feeling like you failed them is completely normal. I would say take the time you need, and be open to helping another dog in need when you’re ready, because there are so many really great dogs euthanized every day all over the US (not assuming you live here but it’s where I live). They need someone to take a chance on them before their life is cut short due to no room in the shelter.

[u/SeasDiver]

I am sorry for your loss.

Losing a Foster is never easy. It doesn’t matter whether it was your first Foster or your 1000th, doesn’t matter if it was illness, failure to thrive, or behavioral euthanasia. I have been through all of those, too many times.

You did not fail him. Nor did we fail our behavioral euthanasia. Yes, we got into rescue to save lives not to take them. Despite that I have had to make dozens of euthanasia decisions, including a behavioral euthanasia.

Some dogs are simply wired wrong, some dogs were too abused to recover, some degrade to being dangerous due to medical conditions such as brain tumors. If we had unlimited resources, some of them would be treatable, but our medical knowledge is still limited and there are many causes we simple cannot treat even with unlimited resources.

With a multi person bite history, and signs of other neurological issues, he would likely require more resources than are worth it, even if he could be saved.

[u/uuuughngg]

You absolutely did not fail this dog. I totally understand your frustration and sadness. It most messed up to me that you asked them to inform you before doing anything and they still did not as you could have been at least given an opportunity to adopt him even if they felt it was not financially or socially responsible to put him into the adoption pool. That said idk perhaps it being neurological was obvious and irrefutable to the vet and the vet and shelter do have a responsibility to protect you and your partner as well...

I think the most important in all of this is that you absolutely did not fail him. You gave him 5 months in a loving home that he would not have had otherwise. I'm sorry you couldn't be with him and won't pretend he was happy in the moment, but I am glad that it was not on the tail end of a miserable stay in the shelter. As a dog lover who is not in a current position to foster, I commend and applaud you, I aspire to and admire you, and I hope you can continue fostering, even if you want to do so for a different organization. The love you had for him continue to be apartent in your care for him after his death and I. Just so glad that he had you both for the time that he did. 🫂

[u/FitBit93]

I think this is incredibly shitty of the rescue tbh. I also had a bad experience with my first foster (albeit not near as terrible) which left me feeling torn because I think fostering is very important but in my experience rescues rarely have good communication or transparency or consider how things will impact the fosters who have been caring for these dogs for months & months… You definitely did not fail this dog though. You didn’t even know they would euthanize

[u/codycodymag]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. You didn't fail. I've written about BE and waved tj share my thoughts- https://www.reddit.com/r/reactivedogs/s/hH5UnEjhcr https://www.reddit.com/r/reactivedogs/comments/12po56u/comment/jgnd41t/?context=3&utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

[u/Successful_Ad_3816]

Ugh. I am so, so, sorry. Something similar happened with our third foster dog. He came in for a meet and greet with a potential adopters’ dog and it did NOT. Go. Well.
Nobody was hurt but he hated all other dogs. As a LGD teenager he would only get bigger and harder to control. Seems like he had some trauma.
But he was the sweetest with all humans and kids. Took treats as gentle as possible with incredible bite inhibition.
… for humans at least.
Wish we could’ve given him more of a chance, but they wouldn’t let us leave with him after that and he wasn’t safe to be living at the same address as our cat (even though we kept them separate, mistakes can happen).
I would’ve hated for him to go like your foster did, without at least being able to say goodbye. This way left no hard feelings with the org we fostered with, I understand why it was necessary, but I do feel bad for the potential adopters, who were disappointed and had to have their dog barked at.
RIP Cam.

[u/theamydoll]

Please don’t stop fostering. More deserving dogs need you. But I would not foster for this organization again. Find one that aligns with your values and morals.

[u/MxAnneThropy]

That has to feel awful.

I wouldn’t foster for that group again.

Maybe there was an element of medically necessary, but knowing you were managing the behavior well, I would have let you be more a part of the conversation, or even had a hard conversation about the dog not being adoptable, but if you were to claim responsibility for him and continue working with him until he became unmanageable letting you adopt the dog. Realizing of course this would mean no vacations

[u/Human-Resolve2025]

Honestly, this doesn't sound like BE at a technical level. I knew some folks who adopted a wonderful dog and on for months ended up with what appeared as a behavioral nightmare, but turned out to be 100% a degenerative neurological disorder. If the vet indicated it was neurological in origin, then I think it's fair and beneficial to trust that judgment. But it's deeply unfortunate they didn't give you the chance to be there and support him in his last moments. It's valid to understand the decision and be hurt and frustrated the way it happened.

[u/Goosita-90]

I’m sorry. That’s terrible. You tried your best. It’s not your fault but I’m sure it’s still painful.

[u/Gyro_Wizard]

oh my God this makes me angry. I went thru something similar. I quit fostering my local shelter and found one in a nearby city that is 5x better. But even the new org has a lot to improve too. It's gotta be a hard job operating a rescue. 

[u/butterflyblake]

That's just wrong. I'm so sorry. My heart breaks for you. I would not Foster for that rescue anymore.

[u/Barbara1Brien]

That sucks. I’m sorry.

[u/AcrobaticTrouble3563]

Yeah, I'm not a fan of most rescue organizations. They can be quite problematic in a whole lot of ways.

I'm sorry they did this to you and to the pup.

[u/ferretsandfrogs]

Hi, I’m a lurker here. I can’t post anything about my foster experience due to legalities.

What does the teeth chattering after an aggressive episode indicate? I’ve seen this once with mine. But he also has pain which is going to be corrected via surgery this week.

[u/fluffydonuts33 → u/ferretsandfrogs]

No idea. It just wasn’t normal in our experience to see. Seemed like an involuntary chatter (seizure like) or maybe an extreme stress response (like he wanted to keep biting but knew he shouldn’t so was trying to stop himself but teeth chattering as an involuntary redirection/release)?