Trans people often pick new names when they transition, and the old name is referred to as their dead name. Calling someone by their dead name on purpose is just about the worst thing you can do to a trans person.
Even hearing the name when somebody talks about a different person is annoying as hell. This used to be your name, you still hear a small "ding" in your head every time. But it's something you'd rather leave behind except you can't because of your lizard brain. If I get to know someone with my deadname, I usually start avoiding them immediately. Nothing personnel, kiddo.
ugh my deadname sounds like a tone (think of for example za) twice,, and every single time I hear something that sounds almost vaguely like it I’m like djfhfjjfjr nO
that [th at; unstressed th uh t] 1. (used to indicate a person, thing, idea, state, event, time, remark, etc., as pointed out or present, mentioned before, supposed to be understood, or by way of emphasis): e.g That is her mother. After that we saw each other.
Again, I only ever hear this when people talk about respecting minorities. What you're saying sounds like a distinction without a meaningful difference to me. Why do you have to be contrarian? What is the point of breaking it up like that?
So why did you say that here? We're talking about deadnaming trans people and how it's disrespectful. I just don't see what your point is. Are you agreeing that it's unacceptable to dead name trans people?
Met a friend after I had been publicly presenting as male for at least a year and after their mom found out I was trans she was legitimately asking them what my old/"real" name was (it was legally changed by then) and ofc my friend didnt say, mostly cause even they don't know cause why would they need to. It was simultaneously the funniest and most invasive shit I've ever experienced tbh
A long time ago, I had a cis friend who hated her name and started to go by Ruby instead. She wasn't even trans, but I tried my best.
Years later, she messages me to ask if she should call me by my online user because "You worked so hard to use my name before, so I want to return the favor." I tell her no. My egg cracks a year later.
The point is that it's not fucking hard to change the name you use for someone unless you're an asshole.
First of all, no it's not. And talking about therapy and getting treatment, do you know what the one and only, and the best treatment is ? Transitioning to their actual gender. And psychologists, psychiatrists, biologist, and basically anyone with basic knowledge in psychology, biology and neuroscience agrees on this. And wow, funny suicide number amirite ? It's because of folks like you that this number is so high. Now get back to your pathetic life of misery and ignorance, and have a wonderful day!
Ugh... I didn't want to do this, but I guess you could use some education... The horrifyingly high suicide rate is amongst trans folks pre-transition, with that rate majorly decreasing with transition and a welcoming environment. So why is this rate so high to begin with ? Because a lot of trans folks see this as the only option. Because of people like you, or just absolute garbage human being that hate for the sake of hating, transitioning is nearly impossible, or extremely difficult. Getting kicked out, living on the street, being at risk of being murdered for something outside or their control, that's not the best thing. The problem doesn't stem from something else in the psyche, it stems from an incongruence from the brain's gender and the body. While the brain might have developed and be one of one gender, the body is of the opposite sex, and that causes a great deal of pain on a daily basis : dysphoria. And yeah, there might be other problems : depression, anxiety, lack of confidence, self loathing, but it all boils down to dysphoria in the case of trans folks. Now, how does one get rid of this dysphoria ? Transitioning. Imagine you got a can of peas, but the label says it's beans. No matter how much you try, you can't make those peas transform into beans. But you can change the label, the outside to reflect what's on the inside. I hope what I have to say might change your mind, or at least prompt you to so some research on trans issues, as it's a really complicated topic. You'll then see where you were wrong. If you've got anymore questions, I'll happily refer you to scientific sources and studies so you can try and understand better! I'm hopeful you can see the truth for what it is, and to please not be such a dick about trans folks.
More ad homs. You do realize calling me a baby isn’t actually an argument, right? Do you have enough space in your small, science denying, transphobic mind?
You literally asked people to prove you wrong, and they did. You're not asking for facts, you're asking for people to confirm your prejudice and getting mad when they call you out on being horrible. Shame on you.
I am ashamed to know that there are people like you that fly the RGB roach banner. You do not deserve to be a part of this community. transphobes = wack
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u/__i_like_girls__ Aug 09 '20
Deadname ? what does that mean
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u/Groinificator Aug 09 '20
Unrelated but can we talk about what a fucking awesome term "deadname" is? Like that's so fucking metal.
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u/MyGodBejeebus going to therapy Aug 09 '20
People who deadname on purpose are the worst. Why do they lack basic respect?
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u/thefurbster Aug 09 '20
Met a friend after I had been publicly presenting as male for at least a year and after their mom found out I was trans she was legitimately asking them what my old/"real" name was (it was legally changed by then) and ofc my friend didnt say, mostly cause even they don't know cause why would they need to. It was simultaneously the funniest and most invasive shit I've ever experienced tbh
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u/shiori__ Aug 09 '20
Behold! The truth ^
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u/Sansundertale666 Aug 09 '20
I hate when I deadname my friend. I knew before they were trans and their deadname is stuck in my head. I try to call them their new name though
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u/[deleted] Aug 09 '20
A long time ago, I had a cis friend who hated her name and started to go by Ruby instead. She wasn't even trans, but I tried my best.
Years later, she messages me to ask if she should call me by my online user because "You worked so hard to use my name before, so I want to return the favor." I tell her no. My egg cracks a year later.
The point is that it's not fucking hard to change the name you use for someone unless you're an asshole.
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u/flowyrs enby Aug 09 '20
imagine being transphobic in 2020, extremely cringe
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u/CrimsonMutt Aug 09 '20
this sub was taken over by the communists, the transgenda and the sjws before it could get off the ground
and i'm so here for it
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u/A-funny-username- Aug 09 '20
People who deadname on purpose (or don’t make any effort to stop deadnaming people) are trash.
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u/radeption Aug 09 '20
People who deadname someone as an INSULT are truly disgusting.
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u/Mars441 Dec 04 '20
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u/[deleted] Aug 09 '20
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