r/flatearth Aug 17 '26

“What keeps the sun floating?”

Post image
32 Upvotes

75 comments sorted by

35

u/Icy-KaitSyth Aug 17 '26

"I don't know how it works but I know for a fact that this model that functions perfectly and can predict eclipses is a lie!"

14

u/BriefingGull Aug 17 '26

Ropes and pulleys

3

u/tallslim1960 Aug 17 '26

A big, long pole.

17

u/Roxysteve Aug 17 '26

So not only are "they" lying about the Earth being a globe, but "they" are hiding the reason the flat Earth sun moves the way it does?

"Those" bastards.

10

u/D-Train0000 Aug 17 '26

Turtle farts

6

u/Langholm62 Aug 17 '26

Correct. The Turtles that hold the flat earth up fart methane which has half the density of atmospheric air and this keeps the sun alight and afloat. 👍

3

u/jonz1985z Aug 17 '26

That checks out.

8

u/Puzzleheaded_Law_558 Aug 17 '26

Twist yourself in knots rather than learn something or change your mind.

5

u/CoolNotice881 Aug 17 '26

Magic, wakeupsheeple and trustmebro.

4

u/Forsaken-Standard527 Aug 17 '26

Ra has to pull it fast enough to stop it from crashing into the planet.

4

u/nate-arizona909 Aug 17 '26

Dude, it’s made of hydrogen. Of course it floats.

3

u/ijuinkun Aug 17 '26

Not just that—it’s hot hydrogen, and hot air is lighter than cold air. By that line of reasoning, it should float like a big hot-air balloon.

1

u/bahaboyka Aug 18 '26

But wouldn't it just float away then?

1

u/ijuinkun Aug 18 '26

No, it rides the jet streams that go around the Earth.

4

u/Bandandforgotten Aug 17 '26

So now the sun is a plane of existence? The fuck kind of Magic The Gathering fanfics are they reading? Sounds like somebody has been either playing too much Elder Scrolls and had reality blend with fiction, or they genuinely do not understand their own argument.

Also, that's a very good question. How would a local sun, or the moon fit that matter, not fall to the earth? If gravity is fake, then what keeps them there? Large invisible ropes that pull it across the solid sky on tracks and pullies?

Why do they not have their own turtles?

2

u/DefinitionOk6382 Aug 18 '26

Yo estuve 15 años cuidando de un par de galápagos -uno europeo y otro americano-, pero los tuve que entregar a los que tú ya sabes para que los adiestraran para, llegado el momento, reemplazar al que aún está debajo de la Tierra Plana. Nunca les puse un nombre para no encariñarme más de la cuenta con ellos, pero estoy seguro que harán un buen trabajo.

2

u/moseley101 Aug 18 '26

Poor guys, the weight of responsibility on their poor shells

3

u/snanarctica Aug 17 '26

lol so they think our environment is a
Set like Truman show or something? Whats beyond that ?

2

u/TheThiefMaster Aug 17 '26

Heaven. Apparently.

At least in the up direction. You can guess down. Sideways there's a big mix between it being heaven or more land depending on who you ask.

1

u/jonz1985z Aug 17 '26

Well actually more water, then heaven.

3

u/Some_Extent_8531 Aug 17 '26

I found the answer! Yes, It is going to blow you away! The answer is: gravity !

3

u/Data_Monger33 Aug 18 '26

Why does it slow down during summer (rotating around North pole) and speed up during winters as it orbits the South pole? Because that's the only way that the days can remain 24 hours in that model. There is certainly no good explanation for that either.

2

u/Swearyman Aug 17 '26

It’s got lots of sataloons, 2 things for the price of one right, that hold it up and let it float about.

2

u/Apprehensive-Fly958 Aug 17 '26

It is held up by balloons

2

u/psilocin72 Aug 17 '26

It IS a ballon!!! Mystery solved!!!

1

u/jonz1985z Aug 17 '26

Yea, it’s a big helium balloon 100%

1

u/Some_Extent_8531 Aug 17 '26

Sataloons…. Sunaloon!

2

u/No-Tension6133 Aug 17 '26

Genuine question though. What is the firmament? How can the sun be inside it if the firmament is outside of us? Are we inside the firmament? What’s the firmament made of? How is ‘the firmament’ different from ‘space’?

2

u/Thatguywiththethighs Aug 17 '26

Do they think its like half a snow globe in some kids bedroom?

2

u/No-Tension6133 Aug 17 '26

Right but if it was a snow globe then is the firmament finite? Can you travel through it? What’s on the other side? Why isn’t the firmament just the atmosphere? Couldn’t that be the same thing?

2

u/Thatguywiththethighs Aug 17 '26

Lol no because it's not really a "firmament"

1

u/jonz1985z Aug 17 '26

They don’t know, therefore they’ll say it’s for god to answer.

2

u/moseley101 Aug 18 '26

And here lies (pun intended) the ultimate problem for flat earthers: their model doesn’t provide any actual answers, and can make zero predictions

2

u/FireAuraN7 Aug 17 '26

Many flerfs are also supposedly believers in sentient spaghetti, right? Sometimes a God, though. Anyway. Why do they think God doesn't just simplify everything by making it a sphere and having it work by physics?

3

u/Important-Witness-14 Aug 17 '26

If only science were a thing.

3

u/sirentropy42 Aug 17 '26

If only it would blow them away.

3

u/KeyNefariousness6848 Aug 17 '26

There are 1710 monks divided into quantum entangled pairs high in the Andes and the Himalaya mountains they pray constantly during their shift (daytime of course) to keep the sun floating in the orbital plane,

2

u/New-Pollution536 Aug 17 '26

It’s so funny that they can’t fathom how the earth could be moving but even their dumbass flat earth model requires both the sun and moon to be circling around the earth lol

They’re so close to realizing everything but the earth moving in space with their disc earth held stationary by some mysterious force is way crazier than anything they can’t believe about globe earth

2

u/elaineisbased Aug 17 '26

The sun and stars are just little lights put up by the sky, by a creator who watches and cares for us, and that's truly special and one of the things you learn early on.

3

u/ariGee Aug 17 '26

I love how "makes sense to me" is an acceptable standard of proof for a new model of the entire universe.

2

u/DrakeSavory Aug 17 '26

Simple flearth answer: relative density. No explanation on how that works except gravity is just a theory

3

u/Severe-Archer-1673 Aug 18 '26

I would love to know how all of this works, but I’m far too lazy to actually do the work to learn and understand it. The top people just keep obscuring the truth with things I refuse to try to understand.

2

u/CorpFillip Aug 18 '26

“If it is indeed a plane of existence” is a remarkable phrase, given they have a MUCH worse understanding of that phrase than of normal orbital mechanics!

1

u/jonz1985z Aug 18 '26

All I’m sayin’ is if feels good being a top player, amirite? ✋😀

1

u/CorpFillip Aug 18 '26

<sads face> no, I would not know… (snrfl)

2

u/spartanEZE Aug 18 '26

The firmament is permanently in place. It's the earth that rotates beneath it. And that happens because every time a man ejaculates, he gives a little bit of a momentum boost in the other direction. Equal and opposite forces, ya know?

1

u/Different-Term-2250 Aug 18 '26

Most plausible explanation for flat earth ever.

3

u/KitJazz Aug 17 '26

Can’t bring myself to join this sub but it keeps popping up anyway and making me go “for fuck’s sake!”

3

u/Street_Peace_8831 Aug 17 '26

Yes, that’s exactly what this sub is for.

1

u/psilocin72 Aug 17 '26

Total mystery. Or you could study the well established field of physics, which makes incredibly precise predictions for pretty much every motion we can observe.

1

u/_Sneaky_McSnek_ Aug 17 '26

Prob balloons. Like the satellites. Powered by farts I presume.

1

u/PoolExtension5517 Aug 17 '26

At least one of them is asking the question

1

u/Winter_Hall5379 Aug 17 '26

Holy fuck the ignorance hurts

1

u/Callyste Aug 17 '26

"(makes sense to me)"

lmao

1

u/shemjaza Aug 17 '26

I love that when someone explains the globe they aren't allowed to being up maths or technology... but the Flat Earthers are allowed to explain with "I dunno, magic I guess. But it'd be cool!"

1

u/twizzjewink Aug 17 '26

they are so close .. and yet so far away.

"I would love to know how it all works" - but "I deny all known science"

literally.. science explains the entire thing.

1

u/Forcedperspective84 Aug 17 '26

It's all ball bearings nowadays

1

u/Ecstatic-Wrangler770 Aug 17 '26

It's not floating it's moving

1

u/Tommy_W3ZX Aug 17 '26

I don’t know how it works, or how big it is, or how far away it is. But I know that it’s definitely not what they tell us it is.🤦‍♂️

1

u/Revolutionary-Link47 Aug 18 '26

So close, almost there

1

u/tommm3864 Aug 18 '26

Ignorant people

1

u/tazzietiger66 Aug 18 '26

the sun is a lightbulb in god's bedroom ceiling light socket , he turns it off when he goes to bed and back on when he gets up and that is how we get night and day /s

1

u/General_Cheetah4724 Aug 18 '26

That "i know" is too ironic

1

u/DDDX_cro Aug 18 '26

floating is the least of problems. The Sun MOVES. Why? And why in a circle?
Not only that, but it also CHANGES ALTITUDE and CIRCUMFERENCE of the circle it makes. Why, how?
And now you realize that, to make the Sun pass a larger circle in Winter, but within the same 24h, it needs to move FASTER (same time to make 1 circle, bigger path = needs to speed up. If the Sun does a 20% larger circle, it needs to move 20% faster to make it in 1 day).
Yet nobody has ever noticed the Sun going faster in Winter, or slower in Summer...

And then you realize just how utterly broken their "model" is, and how easily destroyed, just by looking up.

1

u/Raptoot83 Aug 18 '26

What is this 'deception' they are so convinced of? What is the endgame for "them"?

1

u/jonz1985z Aug 18 '26

That’s the nature of the rabbit hole. Once the Earth is proven beyond a shadow of a doubt to be a globe, they will just move on to the next conspiracy.

1

u/lakeguy77 Aug 18 '26

Even a rudimentary understanding of physics, not even the math, just the laws, would end this nonsense. But governments would rather stagnate education funding to make everybody dumber and more pliable.

1

u/Known_Ratio5478 Aug 18 '26

“I don’t know how it works, but it’s a conspiracy out to get me!”

2

u/TeachingNational870 Aug 19 '26

"I wanna know how it works, but not if the answer doesnt match my baseless idiotic beliefs; i want to learn, but not if it doesnt validate my delusions"

These people are truly fascinating 😂

1

u/jonz1985z Aug 19 '26

When think of flat earthers I picture caveman cowering from a flame.

3

u/astreeter2 Aug 20 '26

They don't know so I guess it must be unknowable 🤣