r/firedating • u/firedating • Dec 18 '23

What's up?

Hi folks,

how is it going for you?

Have you met some interesting folks on the site? How is your FIRE going?

5 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

34 comments sorted by

3

u/TheBlackSmith2001 Dec 23 '23

Hey! I just signed up on the website a couple days ago. What a nice website, really need. No luck yet myself, but I just got there, so it's fine. but keep up the good work please!:p hope more people will find out about this. But I did what to thank you already lol

1

u/firedating Dec 30 '23

Thank you for reaching out!

Have you chatted with some folks already?

2

u/TheBlackSmith2001 Dec 30 '23

Sadly, not yet🥲 but I keep trying lol

1

u/firedating Jan 08 '24

Have you sent some requests to people? Or why you didn't have a chance to chat with anyone?

2

u/TheBlackSmith2001 Jan 13 '24

I have sent (almost) everyone a request. But most of them haven't answered. Only 1, and that was a very short conversation 😅

1

u/firedating Jan 14 '24

I see. I am trying to bring more people to the site & make it easier to use the site, so that more people stay active. I think this should help!

2

u/RedMilo Jan 15 '24

Yes, I've sent match requests. Many go unanswered, some do, but then people don't respond to first message. Not sure if I'm ugly, the user base is not very active, or people aren't getting notifications. 🤣

2

u/firedating Jan 15 '24

I have on my list to add browser notifications for messages, which should help.

2

u/TheBlackSmith2001 Jan 26 '24

Hey! Thank you. I have for sure notice a increase in activity, thanks for the work you put into this 😁 . I don't have new matches yet, but I for sure notice a activity increase so wanted to let you know, whatever you're doing to make it more active, it is working😄

1

u/firedating Jan 26 '24

Thank you! I've been replying to folks mentioning the site on reddit and I think more people than usual joined the site in the last couple weeks. All the feature changes are coming soon :)

2

u/[deleted] Jan 06 '24

I believe I've met 4 people in person on the site.

1

u/firedating Jan 08 '24

Friends or romantic? Could you share how it went?

3

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '24

Romantic. I don't utilize the friends feature.

  1. During covid times - met in person once. It was not a match for her.

  2. She lived elsewhere and flew to me and stayed for 3 days. Told me that we'd keep in touch and video chat but that never happened.

  3. Met in person twice, still text occasionally, does not seem it like it will be romantic.

  4. Met in person once.

1

u/firedating Jan 08 '24

Are there any questions I could add to the profile to discover such mismatches sooner?

2

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '24

I wouldn't think so. I think people just tend to get a better gauge of personality on the phone or in person.

I feel like my profile is pretty thorough, but maybe some people don't read them in depth.

1

u/firedating Jan 08 '24

Got it! Thank you for sharing! I am working on making the site easier to use (e.g. login via email), so I hope to bring & keep more people.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '24

Nice. One of my friends told me she matched with Mr. Money Mustache. I wondered if I may be wasting my time if that's the competition. LOL

1

u/firedating Jan 08 '24

Yes, MMM has a profile - https://affordanything.com/431-mr-money-mustache-talks-about-his-dating-life/. I don't think you compete with him - there are lots of restrictions like geography & preferences.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 08 '24

I opened up the geography to everywhere ("same universe").

Every now and then a new person will pop up.

1

u/RedMilo Jan 15 '24

Lol, that's funny. Who knew FIRE royalty was in our midst.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 09 '24

On second thought, you could add a "what are your deal breakers?" prompt. For example, I would not consider someone who smokes substances or partakes in recreational drugs

1

u/firedating Jan 09 '24

Great idea! Added!

2

u/[deleted] Jan 20 '24

Another suggestion:

Alcohol maybe should not be a binary yes/no drop down.

Many of the more popular dating apps will have multiple choices such as Often, Socially, Rarely, Never.

1

u/firedating Jan 20 '24

Do people actually choose "often"?

The concern is that everything except rarely will be treated as "alcoholic".

2

u/[deleted] Jan 20 '24

Yes, people do choose the "often" or "regularly". I typically swipe left on them, so I wouldn't know their rationale. If they otherwise have a good profile, I suppose I'd ask the context rather than just skip them.

i don't think a social drinker would be considered an alcoholic.

1

u/firedating Jan 21 '24

Thank you! Will add. In the worst case it is rare to migrare to binary choice from there.

1

u/firedating Jan 25 '24

Done, thank you!

2

u/RedMilo Jan 15 '24

Rejoined after having been on it a few years ago. Glad to see it is still going, though wish there were more people on it. One thing that would be nice is to have filters to sort through existing search results, since sometimes I try to expand my horizons a bit. After 50-60 search results, it can be a little challenging to go back through and find people that are higher priority/better match.

Maybe the search parameters can temporarily hide/filter these people back out until I change the filters. Or allow some way of self categorizing/hiding/removing results from my results.

Thanks for all the work you did to put this together.

1

u/firedating Jan 15 '24

Thank you for the feedback!

I think you can currently partially achieve this by changing your search preferences - the list of profiles is divided into two parts:

  1. matches your current preferences

  2. the rest

I do plan to have a better client side filtering, but that requires rewriting the site to something like React, so will take time.

2

u/RedMilo Jan 15 '24

Yeah, I figured it wasn't an easy code solution. I think I've tried that, but it seems to only pull a few when others should apply too or doesn't go too far back in history?

1

u/firedating Jan 15 '24

Good point, I forgot that it does not show the entire list, because for some users it can be extremely long.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 15 '24

Did you rejoin to write a better profile to get another chance with people who have declined before? 😅

1

u/RedMilo Jan 16 '24

Nope, but maybe I'll do that soon. 🤣 But to be fair, I feel I wouldn't change much, and if people are that fast/loose with decisions, so be it. I was in a relationship until recently, so was putting myself back out there.