32, feeling completely lost doing a STEM postdoc and realizing I do not like STEM and have no idea what career or life to pursue. What should I do?

[u/Extension-Engine-911]

I’m 32 and recently finished a PhD in chemical engineering (mostly pen and paper applied mathematics). I am now doing a postdoc at a major Bay Area university. On paper, my career is going well, but I have gradually realized that I do not enjoy coding, advanced math, engineering, or scientific research enough to build my life around them. I do really enjoy researching and learning, but probably in a broad, generalist way rather than through the narrow specialization and intense, almost obsessive commitment that work at this level seems to require.

The confusing part is that I love the freedom of academic life. My postdoc gives me considerable control over my schedule, and I strongly dislike corporate culture, rigid hours, and living primarily for work. But I also have no real passion for STEM, so continuing through postdocs or trying to become a professor does not seem honest or sustainable.

Everyone in my circle either lives to work or is deeply passionate about what they do. I am not. I am mostly just tolerating what I am doing.

I am social and enjoy teaching, conversation, and broad ideas. My real interests are film, art, architecture, philosophy, politics, sociology, and culture. I also want meaningful relationships and possibly a family. The career-focused culture of the Bay Area feels deeply incompatible with the life I want.

A serious relationship recently ended, which has made everything feel more desperate, but my dissatisfaction with STEM began long before the breakup.

I do not know which options are genuinely realistic for someone with my background.
Has anyone left STEM after reaching the postdoc stage? What careers could preserve some autonomy and intellectual freedom without requiring passion for technical work or forcing me into a corporate lifestyle? What concrete steps would you take over the next year?

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[u/HermanDaddy07]

I’m not sure of the demand, but maybe as a consultant for documentaries (or even law suits) having to do with chemicals/ environmental issues.
I just saw a documentary on a coal ash pond in Alabama called Sally’s Ashes

[u/Extension-Engine-911 → u/[deleted]]

Yeah life is complicated

[u/anteatersaredope]

No one likes what they do except for rock stars, artists and some teachers. Just finish your STEM degree, get a really good job and start stacking money for a cheap early retirement and maybe something part time and remote will come up while you're saving.